I was so very humbled when my friend, Kathy, who filmed my natural birth, sent this to me and asked me to post it. God’s tender mercies and the unraveling of the sweetest gifts keep being revealed to me day by day.
“I felt like I was on the outside looking in. My job was to take pictures and video. I have had four babies and they were all born c-section, 2 of them I was not even awake for, so I was pretty excited and nervous to be able to be in the room while Kelly endured so much pain and Ellia made her grand entrance. Although seeing this gift from God come into the world was one of the highlights of my life, there are so many other things I learned as I walked through this with Kelly and Aaron.
First– I’ve always been blessed and somewhat envious of the love and support of Kelly’s parents (and her brother). They are a part of her everyday life; few people have that. Not only are they close, but her parents are Godly people who share basically the same world view as Kelly and her family. What a blessing this is!
It was beautiful to watch her mom and dad stay the whole time she labored and birthed. They were attentive to her needs, and her poor mother who is so tenderhearted could hardly stand the pain Kelly was suffering. I don’t think she ever sat back and relaxed any…it was a long night! Her dad was a strong, yet kind, presence. The fact that her parents are actually married and there together is something that most of us do not have. The fact that they shared in her joy of *another* child is over the top! Towards the end of the video watch her dad’s face as he looks at his new granddaughter! Look at her mom’s face as she is glowing over Ellia in the warmer. It was just beautiful! Few families experience this!
Second- Aaron’s steadfast love and support! Oh my!!! (Aaron is a lot like my husband.) Aaron was right there every step of the way. When the labor heated up he rarely sat down. He was constantly massaging Kelly, heating her rice pack, walking with her, whispering words of encouragement for 15 hours! He was very, very strong, confident and calm! When Kelly was entertaining thoughts of meds he gently reminded her not to give in, although he hated to see her pain. He knew she’d regret giving in; he helped her push through those temptations. Aaron was so strong and gentle. He was a true servant to his wife through this and took command when he needed to (informing the nurses what they needed).
At one point during the night Aaron led all of us in prayer for Kelly. A few hours later he asked Kelly’s dad to pray…oh my!!!!! I about lost it then. How beautiful and MIGHTY it is to have a husband and father love you and come before the throne of God on your behalf… I cannot even find the words for this. This brings me to tears more than Ellia’s birth does.
When I left the hospital the next morning I was overwhelmed with gratefulness. And to be completely honest I had some jealously; jealously of the Godly love and dedication of her family. Kelly’s family is not perfect, they have issues, just as we all have. Even though her parents may not be 100% on the same page with her and Aaron on every issue, they do seek after righteousness, and the Crawford family reaps the rewards of that!
Some may say, “Well that’s good if you have a *kind* husband, or loving parents that are still married”. But do you know why she has that? Because her parents sought after God and desired to obey Him. They have lived their lives to honor God. Thus the blessings have been poured out on their children. This is how it should be. Even though they have their struggles and shortcomings, they press on to live a Biblical life!
People are critical of patriarchy (dare I utter THAT word here), but I think it is because they don’t see it being lived out in a Biblical manner. There are patriarchs that are not Godly, that rule with an iron fist, but this is not the way God ordained it. A true patriarch leads, yet serves; he protects and provides, yet loves with gentleness and kindness. This is God’s way!!!
So most of us do not have this heritage, but that does not excuse us from walking the path of righteousness. We have got to break generations of ungodliness, starting with baby steps in obedience now. Many women do not have a husband like Kelly’s or mine, but that does not give an excuse to disobey God’s commands. Yes, Kelly has much wisdom, but that is because of her Godly heritage, her diligence to search out God’s word and GOD’S GRACE!
It wasn’t just Kelly laboring, we were all right there with her. And although we did not feel her pain, we did share in her love for God and a desire to bring forth a Godly generation, to fill the earth and subdue it for Christ’s sake!”
A very humbled and grateful friend,
Kathy Brodock
20 comments
Perfectly said!
Yes, Kelly certainly is blessed. The video was very touching to watch.
I was raised by a single dad (and my grandmother) back in the 50’s! My mother has not been a part of my life since I was 7. None were Christians. I went to Catholic school with the nuns for 7 years, who taught me right from wrong. I was married at 17, and a year after our marriage, we started attending Bible churches, and eventually were saved in our late 20’s. Going to a Bible church is the best thing we ever did.
It is great to start teaching our children Biblical principles from the time they are young.
Thank you for sharing, Kathy. I’m blessed and encouraged by your insights.
Yes, perfectly said!
Oooh, that was a beautiful post!
Hurrah! for loving and supportive family and Hurrah! for Biblical patriarchy. 🙂
OK… STOP IT!!! BOTH OF YOU!!! 😀 You have me crying AGAIN! :’-)
“People are critical of patriarchy (dare I utter THAT word here), but I think it is because they don’t see it being lived out in a Biblical manner. There are patriarchs that are not Godly, that rule with an iron fist, but this is not the way God ordained it. A true patriarch leads, yet serves; he protects and provides, yet loves with gentleness and kindness. This is God’s way!!!”
So true, and it is so evident from yesterday’s video…. Aaron’s tender touch and Mr. L’s (Kelly’s dad) sweet gentleness!
Thank you for that, Kelly.
One of the greatest blessings in my life is that I have that heritage. My parents have been faithfully serving God ever since before I was born. And they worked hard to pass Biblical values on to their children. I pray that God will help us to carry that on and continue to bless future generations with a godly heritage.
Kathy,
Thank you so much for what you’ve shared. I can relate to what you are saying about having your husband and father approaching the throne of grace on your behalf. That always touches me deeply and brings tears to my eyes.
One of the greatest blessings in my life is that my parents have always been faithful and worked hard to pass that godly heritage on to their children. It is my prayer that God will give us grace and wisdom, and that the fruit of our labors will bring him glory in future family generations.
‘We have got to break generations of ungodliness, starting with baby steps in obedience now’. That statement jumped out of the page for me. I have a Christian heritage, my husband does not, saved at 18 on a beach mission, we thought he was the only Christian in his family for generations. My daughter loves researching family history and found another Christian… many generations ago.. a famous Maori chief who was converted to Christianity. We do wonder what happened and why his descendants never, as far as we know, walked in faith. This lesson from our past has spurred us on to pass on our legacy of faith and trusting in God to our children and the generations yet to be born. We cannot change the past but we can as Kathy states start now and impact the present and the future for the glory of God.
I have just watched your video Kelli… so very special. I’m still in awe as I am expecting my seventh baby in December. A very active baby who was very much awake and moving as I sat and watched! Just reminding me that the wondrous journey of pregnancy, labour, birth, motherhood and family continues!
Amen! Thank you for sharing, Kathy! blessings, jen in al
My husband and I are “first generation” Christians trying to raise a first generation family seeking Jesus. I think the foundation that your family has laid is invaluable and I wish we had that same foundation. Some days I wish I could rely on my parents to guide me. I praise God for your parents obedience and your hubby!!
I don’t believe that patriarchy is THE way, or the only way, in God’s plan. If people focused more on obeying the One perfect Man instead of many imperfect ones and men understood that spirituality is about serving and loving rather than hierarchy, we wouldn’t have to worry about abuse to begin with. I will not have to, because I know what to look for.
Kelly, you are indeed blessed with your husband.
Jennifer,
Be careful…abuse is not the fault of a biblical teaching. Teaching patriarchy (and in the true sense of the meaning, it IS a concise biblical teaching) doesn’t allow or excuse abuse. And just because men abuse it, doesn’t mean we must stop teaching it. No more than we would tell people to stop eating because there are some who are prone to gluttony.
We have to teach the right things–all the time. Those who abuse it are in need of rebuke, counsel, discipline–whatever. But we don’t change the teaching of God’s Word.
Jennifer,
One more note…we aren’t commanded to obey “many imperfect men” according to Scripture; We are commanded to *submit* to only our husbands. And even when they’re imperfect, it matters not. Our submission to them IS obedience to the One perfect God. We simply CAN’T obey God unless we, well, obey Him by doing what He says! And one of those things is submitting to our husbands.
I believe in submission, but not in the hierarchal sort. We also disagree in what the Bible teaches regarding patriarchy. *shrugs* Thanks for the explanation and the time you took to type it.
Jennifer,
Not to be argumentative, because I think modern churches are hurting families by not teaching truth. But what do you believe the Bible teaches?
I Corinthians 11:3
But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.
Genesis 3:6 (God Speaking)
Unto the woman he said, …. and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.
1. Ephesians 5:22
Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.
2. Ephesians 5:24
Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
3. Colossians 3:18
Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
Since Ephesians 5:24 says “Now as the church submits to Christ”. So my question is if we are to submit as the church submits to Christ, wouldn’t that mean a pretty strong submission since Christ is over the church. Or do you think the church is on the same hierarchal sort of level as Christ?
Hi there, Kim. If you want a more in-depth explanation of my beliefs, or to discuss them, I might just email you since I don’t want a debate here. To answer this question, “Or do you think the church is on the same hierarchal sort of level as Christ?”
I don’t believe that HUSBANDS are on that same level. Comparing husbands to God is playing with fire: God is perfect and non-erring, while husbands are..so the opposite. Without absolute obedience to the all-perfect Christ, the church will be and has been lost and corrupt; you simply can’t make an absolute comparison between wives and churches and/or husbands and God. I believe submission is to be mutual, out of love, and that the command for husbands to die for their wives is not simply a literal command which will probably never happen in one’s lifetime, but a command for husbands to die TO themselves for their wives; heavy submission indeed. Whether you believe submission is mutual or not basically depends on whether you think God’s command for husbands involves or could be defined as submission; I definitely do.
On a last note, many see this Scripture as a command to Eve: “and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.”
I don’t see this as a command, but a prediction: God was warning Eve that Adam, now being a sinful husband, would want to sinfully dominate Eve, and she in her weakness would desire this dominance. Please know, I’m not trying to change anyone’s mind here, partly because I know it’d mostly be fruitless; I’m just explaining my position.
Jennifer,
I hope I didn’t compare husbands to God… and if it came across that way I apologize.
I was just pointing out Scripture’s own comparison. Forgive my capital letters, I am really not trying to scream; it’s just the only way I know how to add emphasis.
Scripture (Ephesians 5:24) says:
Now AS THE CHURCH submits to Christ, SO ALSO wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
What I was saying is that since Scripture itself says it that way, shouldn’t we take that pretty seriously? It seems pretty clear to me.
Also, I need to point out that I have a very sweet, godly husband who sacrifices for me every day and loves me! If I need to bring up something that is bothering me, I have no problem doing it. I just do it respectfully (no nagging, no dominance, no bossing)… because of what Scripture says. My guy really appreciates that, and loves me all the more.
He doesn’t boss me around either. 🙂
http://www.loveandrespect.com/content/crazy_cycle_videoStream.php
“I hope I didn’t compare husbands to God… and if it came across that way I apologize”
Oh, not at all! I didn’t mean to give that impression; sorry. I just know that some people have done this, even unintionally. You sound like you have a beautiful marriage, and that’s always what happens when love and God are the priorities in one, whether it’s complimentarian or not.
Kelly, your explanation about God’s Word and the submission it teaches IS a perfect example of how Christian spouses should live; even if we disagree on certain specifics, I do know that submission is a command. Thank you both, ladies, for your wise conversation 🙂
Beautifully and sweetly written.
I do not come from a Godly family, in fact I am the first Believer in my family, but I’m so excited to be breaking out of generations of sin and rebellion from the Lord, to have been given a husband (and in-laws) who love the Lord and can speak into our lives, and to be starting my own family, raising them in God’s ways. Even if we didn’t grow up with it, we can still offer that blessing to our kids, that it may be passed down through future generations.