I’ll be using a lot of the content written here (there’s a LOT of evergreen content) and converting the posts into podcast for your listening ease. But if you have any specific questions/topics you’d like to hear me address, PLEASE let me know! I may even include a “reader question” on a regular basis.
I aim to publish a new podcast every week, perhaps even bi-weekly.
Let me know what you think and I’m open to any suggestions in the future!
You may have noticed it’s been a while between the last post in the Narcissist Series and this one. It’s because this is so hard for me to write and also, not everyone will agree with me. This subject has caused a good deal of pain and dissension in the church, so I don’t enter this discussion lightly. Nor do I claim to have the authoritative answer. I don’t. I’m using my experience dealing with narcissists, my experience counseling people in narcissistic relationships, many hours of reading and researching authorities on the subject (counselors, pastors, etc.), seeking the Lord and trying to put all that together to write these posts.
As an aside, there are a few random facts to note:
So the question: What to do if you’re married to a narcissist? (If you are in a different relationship with a narcissist–not marriage, there are different answers/approaches, none of them easy. Each one has it’s own, difficult road.)
First, the really awful news about this is narcissist rarely (that’s being generous) change. I’ve read countless articles by psychologists and counselors in all types of environments and hands-down, they agree with this statement.
As I mentioned in the last post, a person claiming to be a Christian but committing consistent, emotional abuse is, in fact, not a Christian by definition, regardless of his claims. One must display the fruit of Christianity (repentant over sin at the very least) to be a Christian. So if you think you are married to a narcissist, you must face the reality that you are dealing with an unrepentant sinner, but worse, doesn’t see his sin, and therefore doesn’t see his need for a Savior.
Because of the very nature of this trait, that they can’t see their wrong, so they rarely see their need for change.
At this point, I wish there was something I could say to soften this harsh blow. I don’t have anything. I don’t understand it and I wish I did. It seems like they could be reasoned with or that they could understand rational explanations. But they can’t.
IMPORTANT (Update): A common problem is that a woman is not believed (by family or church) when she tells others about her abuser. (And be warned: it is also very common for the abuser to play the victim. I’ve seen it done and done very well. In this case the wife was the narcissist and convinced others her husband was the abuser.) I think often, in the spirit of respect and submission she doesn’t share with anyone about her husband’s behavior because she wants to honor his reputation. Then when everything hits the fan and she speaks up, others find it unbelievable. She may even have bragged about what a great husband and father he is on social media (a tactic of reverse-psychology, maybe?)
My suggestion is to share with someone, even several others, and do not keep the abuse hidden. At least if you decide to leave, there will be a “trail” of efforts you made to preserve your marriage and your support group will not be so hard to convince.
There are really only 2 options, a possible, difficult third. The first is to get a divorce. Some churches and Christian counselors believe that divorce is only acceptable for a Christian if there is infidelity in marriage. They cite Scriptures like “God hates divorce” (Malachi 2:16) to strengthen their counsel. This verse is grossly misunderstood when used to pressure a woman to stay in an abusive relationship (it actually is explaining the opposite of what it is sometimes used for).
How do I know? Because the verse is written specifically to men who were abandoning their wives, which in that culture, meant almost certain destitution for them. God was angry because husbands were mistreating and being unfaithful to their wives and leaving them without protection. It goes on to say that the man “who hates and divorces his wife does violence to the one he should protect.”
The whole passage is about God’s anger toward men who treat their wives unlovingly and do not protect them. He was seeking justice for these oppressed women. How could God say in the same breath, “But if you leave your abusive husband that’s not OK.”
That’s the tip of the iceberg when it comes to God’s thought toward those who are being oppressed or hurt by those in authority. Do some research about how God feels about the mistreatment of the weak, poor, needy, oppressed, abused.
Another verse that allows for biblical separation but is often misunderstood is 1 Corinthians 7:15. Here is a snippet of explanation about it but if you want to read the entire article, click here.
“When applying 1 Corinthians 7:15, the key question is not “Who walked out?” but “Who caused the separation?” Would it be sensible to say that David was the sinful rebellious one when he left Saul’s court? No, he left because of Saul’s abuse. David left, but Saul was the cause of his leaving. If we translate the word chorizo as “separate” we see this more clearly: if the unbeliever separates, let him separate. The unbeliever is doing the separating; the believer is commanded to let it be done. This tells the believing spouse (and the church) to allow the marriage to be over, because the unbeliever has destroyed the covenant. It permits the victim of abuse to take out a legal divorce. Let there be chorizo = let there be separation = let there be legal divorce, because the word chorizo means both separation and divorce.”
What God hates more than even divorce, is abuse. Mistreatment of others, especially by those in authority over people they are meant to protect. I feel confident saying that it is biblically acceptable to seek a divorce from an abusive spouse, once all measures have been taken to bring them to repentance.
Even in simple passages in Proverbs addressing the “fool,” or the “mocker” (biblical terms for narcissist) we often read passages such as, “Drive out the mocker and out goes strife. Quarrels and insults are ended.”
Furthermore, God Himself divorced His unfaithful bride. (Jeremiah 3:8)
It is very important that if you consider divorcing your spouse that you have a plan–a back-up support system and safety plan in place. Narcissists can be dangerous, especially when their power and control unravels. Hopefully your church would be that safe place, but if not, find one that is, or confide in family and friends who can help you.
This option is difficult but not impossible. I know women living with abusive husbands and have been for many years. Leaving is very hard. Sometimes it feels impossible. Without a strong support group, especially, turning your life upside down, finding yourself financially responsible and in every other way responsible, feels overwhelming. Some people never get to the breaking point where they are willing to give up these necessities/comforts.
If you choose to stay it is imperative that you educate yourself with how the mind of your spouse works. You can pray and hope and believe, and I don’t discredit that spirit of faith. But as I mentioned before, the difficulty with this specific type of person is that they don’t see a need for change, therefore change rarely happens. They believe they are right and everyone else is in need of correction. They thrive in feeling power and control.
A “good wife” tries to be kinder, more reasonable, more agreeable more, more, more. And it’s never enough. It never will be. To live in this situation and survive, I think it’s wise to study “how to live with a narcissist” which involves learning how to set hard boundaries, coming to the harsh reality that you will not receive from your spouse what you want (love, affection, real companionship, empathy) and finding your ultimate peace and joy in the Lord. He must be enough.
It’s a tragic death of a dream, if you will, and the sooner you come to term with that, the better. You must find joy in other things, not your marriage.
This is a terribly painful road and you will need friends and family who understand and can support and encourage you.
Separation. This would be for the person who cannot believe that the Bible allows for divorce–an infinite separation (which will likely end up with your spouse divorcing you ). I’m throwing this out there because, as I said, I don’t have all the answers. I believe with all my heart that God would far rather see his beloved free from an abusive spouse than to maintain a sanction of ceremony for appearance sake. That’s not the way I see him operating in Scripture.
I can’t emphasize enough the importance of seeking out the counsel of someone who understands this type of abuse. If not, you may end up in counseling where you abuser manipulates and turns you into the perpetrator. Be clear and concise when describing your situation to others. Even though you may be confused, it is important to paint a picture of what is happening in your home.
Often the wife has been taught to protect her husband’s reputation under the guise of submission. We are never called to hide a person’s abuse. Ever. This is not a case of looking over his weaknesses. This is calling out an oppressor. (If, in fact, he fits the description I’ve described in these post–consistent, manipulative behavior that seeks to bring pain, shame and blame, refusing to own the hurt, etc.). Bring it to light and it loses its power.
I pray you will find some help and encouragement from these posts. I would love to hear your thoughts.
Fifteen years Nineteen years ago we married, mainly because we were infatuated with each other and thought it would be cool to get to share a house. God’s direction and miraculous grace on those two wayward young people cannot be measured, as I ponder the depth and growth of our love–he’s my husband, my teacher, my best friend.
Marriages are built, not fallen into. They are tended, not run on autopilot. You must intentionally spend time growing marriage. The years are made of weeks, the weeks days, and the days moments. And what happens in those moments is what a marriage becomes.
I’ve learned a lot in the last fifteen years, mostly about myself and how much a good marriage depends on our choices. But there’s a disclaimer: My husband is a rock star. You know, not in the literal sense, just that he makes marriage easy and I think he’s awesome. He hardly ever, ever, ever gets mad at me. That’s worth a gold medal. He listens to me and takes to heart my thoughts, feelings and opinions. He likes to make me happy. He serves me and never keeps score. (He isn’t perfect, but you know that, because he is human.) And even with a man like that, a marriage could easily falter and break under the weight of daily cares and careless neglect. I can still find things to complain about–we all can, because we’re human and sinful and selfish.
Two big things I’ve learned in my fifteen years:
1. Expectations will destroy your marriage or at least make it miserable.
2. Choosing to see the best in your spouse makes all the difference.
We see those with whom we live under a microscope (too bad we don’t see ourselves that way enough). Marriage is work because it requires us to keep liking a person even though we know all his faults and even though we are more familiar with him than anyone. (Why does “familiarity too often breed contempt”?)
But that should be just the sweetness of marriage: the intimacy to know a person and be known, and still be unconditionally loved. Because a person who can love another person, despite faults and humanness, is a person who has chosen to live in forgiveness, loving as he wishes to be loved.
And the person receiving full acceptance and love, despite shortcomings, is a person who has found a safe reprieve from everything harsh and scary in the world.
And what if we were more careful with the gift of a spouse? What if we smiled at him like we smile at our friends? Like we are glad when he comes home? What if we picked up his clothes gratefully, remembering how painful it would be if tomorrow there were no clothes because there was no husband? What if we found little ways to make his life easier or more fun? What if we didn’t complain so much about what we don’t have or what needs to be fixed and just expressed gratitude for the good things? What if we remembered to joke around, play pranks and in general, lighten up? What if we really worked on making him enjoy being with us, looking forward to us?
Here’s the part that hurts to write: I’m learning it, but I’m still not good at living it. I still create expectations and allow myself disappointment if they’re not met; I can still be so quick to point out his faults when there are ten of mine own staring me in the face. I am often far too careless, taking his gentleness and goodness for granted.
I’m learning from him. Because he loves without expectation and he forgives as if it’s the first offense. He pretends to be blind to my faults and that is amazing to me.
Surely it’s close.
Thank you, my beloved, for putting flesh on real love for me.
In no particular order, instead of making new year’s resolutions, I’ve been working on a list of simple things I’m doing to make this year better. I am a simple girl, I love simple changes and I don’t want to feel overwhelmed by resolutions I know I can’t won’t keep.
There’s nothing like aging that will make you pay a bit more attention to your health.
Turmeric is top of the list. Have you people read about this miraculous wonder-spice? You should. It would be easier for me to list all the health benefits it doesn’t have than the ones it does. Aids weight loss, helps with depression and enhances mood, relieves pain better than ibuprofen, anti-inflammatory (excellent for arthritis and other disease caused by inflammation), fights cancer, prevents stroke and Alzheimer’s, detoxifies the liver…and I could keep going. Go get some (that’s my very own brand) and take it every day for the rest of your (obviously) long life. I’m pumped.
Water. Ah it’s so simple to drink more water, isn’t it? No. No it’s not simple for me. Ironically, water is about the only beverage I drink besides coffee but unless I’m thirsty I just don’t want it. Nevertheless, I believe in the importance of it so I’m keeping a pitcher in the fridge, a cup beside me, and I’m just trying to take a few sips every few minutes. I’ll report back.
I already take the following supplements, but not as consistently as I should, so I’m tightening up there:
GABA, HTP-5, Fish Oil-Omega-3, Vitamin C, Vitamin D, Vitamin B-Complex
Starting the day with more fervent prayer. I admit this is a weak area for me, even though the Lord has given me plenty to drive me to my knees. We moms are so busy it’s easy to feel like we don’t have time to pray, when really, we don’t have time not to pray. Why do I forget, “the fervent prayers of the righteous avails much..” I need much availing in my life. And we need to remember (and believe) that the Lord seeks out those whose faith is great in order to reward them. Don’t believe me? “And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.” Whatever you are facing in your life, commit with me to believing the promises of God, and wrestling with Him in prayer until He answers you. Face him boldly and ask repeatedly. It is your privilege to appeal to the Holy of Holies and we need to believe that He is a rewarder of those who seek him earnestly.
Sorry about the title, but Stop Being a Butthole Wife will give you a new perspective on treating your husband with respect and kindness. Who’s in with me? “Father deliver us from our critical spirits!”
Whether it’s listening to my 3 year-old or pausing for an elderly friend, life is short and what matters most is that we are fully present with the people in our lives today. Time is fleeting and as my second child has just left the nest, nothing reminds me so brutally of that fact. Hug them tighter, slow down, take your eyes off the screen, study the details of their faces, just sit and talk and head toward the end of your life without the regret of rushing and the despair of distraction.
Boil life down to one statement for a Christian, and I think it’s this: We exist to bring glory to God. And since each of us has been given a gift or several, that’s where we best accomplish our earthly mission. So I’m asking myself, what is my gift, and how can I use it–not as the world would say I should use it–but how can I really use it, every day, to bring glory to my Creator? Finding that, I believe, brings us joy unspeakable.
So here is to growing in 2017. To feeling our best, intentional living and a rock-solid faith that keeps us moveless and drops the jaws of the world around us.
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Visit our new Etsy Shop!
Also new this year is my Etsy shop! We opened at Christmas with strong sales (thanks to many of you!) and it’s still a work in progress but you’ll love our cute, personalized cutting boards, especially perfect for gifts! I’d love if you stop by! In fact, here’s a coupon code for 15% off any order: thankyougift
Sometimes I need to give myself a good old-fashioned “talkin’ to” and you may as well eaves drop ’cause this is gonna be good.
I find it easy to talk about this or that virtue of being a Christian–“be kindly affectionate to one another…”, “in lowliness of mind, let each consider others better than himself…”, and that bit about how the whole sum of the gospel is found in loving God and your neighbor–until it comes down to the hard part of doing it with our closest neighbors.
That would be my husband and children.
We think the “love your neighbor” part sounds beautiful because we have no trouble smiling at the cashier–that neighbor who hasn’t rubbed against us all day–and calling that love. Or the friend who calls when we put on our sweetest voice and offer to go the extra mile without even a harrumph.
“Do I love them with the Jesus-love of doing? Kneeling down and washing grimy, proverbial feet. Without any feeling of martyrdom.”
The ones who live with me? I don’t mean “Do I love them?”, of course I love them! Infinitely and intensely. But love is more than an emotional state or a feeling. Do I love them with the Jesus-love of doing? Kneeling down and washing grimy, proverbial feet. Without any feeling of martyrdom.
Do I turn the other cheek and give more than is asked of me–gladly?
Do I speak those things which are edifying, building up and giving grace to those who hear it?
Do I extend the kindness of the Lord to my family each day? Painting for them the picture of Christ? (“We are His Body.”)
We are put in families, I believe, to learn the very gritty essence of why Christ died. We are put here to have our dross removed, to see our sin in all its fullness only to drive us deeper into our Savior’s love.
Here are our neighbors and here we get the chance to obey Him to our core, in our realness. And He gives us grace to do that every step.
I want to love my neighbors as myself. But it starts here if at all.
“He giveth more grace when the burdens grow greater…”
I received a letter from a reader who was really broken about how her past had affected her marriage. I agonized with her because I felt every pain she expressed. Although she explained that she was technically a virgin when she married, she had far crossed the line of intimacy with previous boyfriends.
Harmless? That’s what our culture would have us believe. But those women willing to be honest admit that God never intended for us to be intimate with anyone other than our spouses. It was for our good that He designed this arrangement, and when we disregard it, we bring heaps of pain upon ourselves and our families.
I prayed a lot about that letter and felt that sharing a post on this subject might be helpful as I’m guessing there are thousands of women experiencing heartache because of past baggage.
Here are some random consequences I have found to be true of women who talk about this issue:
I believe this is one of the biggest problems with many marriages, and here’s why:
Men simply derive a large part of their bond to their wives through a loving, intimate relationship–particularly when the wife desires her husband.
When there is a breach in this area, there is a HUGE breach. It is so important for us to understand this! Men feel about intimacy (sex) as we feel about communication and relationship. It is crucial to their closeness to us and feeling loved by us.
Don’t listen to the stereotypical ideas about men in this area. Yes, they were made to desire sex, and there is nothing bad about that. It is their language. We must treat it as important to them as their loving us in our language.
I believe the recreational dating system (where most of us fell prey to these premature, intimate relationships) has single-handedly done the most harm to marriages. And for that reason, I believe it behooves us to stop at nothing to preserve the emotional and physical purity of our children–even the willingness to be persecuted by those who expect our children to participate in recreational dating.
If you did not enter into marriage whole and pure, it’s not the end of the world, but you have some work to do–we have some work to do. And I don’t believe it’s an easy fix. It most certainly starts with repentance, prayer and a deep desire for God to heal what is broken. And although He is a healer, often a scar must remain. Sin produces consequences.
Renewing our minds is a crucial next step for restoration. We must remind ourselves of the facts I mentioned above, and frankly, CHOOSE to love our husbands in this way, even if we don’t feel like it.
Our emotional state is closely tied to our physical state, which is why we’re having this problem to begin with…REPROGRAM.
Feeding the mind, renewing the mind with truth, choosing to think about our marital relationships as the most important one on earth, and being willing to lay aside our hang-ups may be the only route to take.
He doesn’t always feel like expressing romance, affection or attention to us, but he does it because he loves us. Let our response be the same if it has to be. Purpose to CHOOSE love…in his language.
P.S. I just feel like there are so many women reading this who are hurting, and desperately seeking to be freed in this area. If you have had victories over past hurts, we’d love to hear you share your insight or advice…it would be fine to post anonymously on this one.
A couple I know very well are getting a divorce after almost 3 decades of marriage. The husband discovered she was having an affair.
I am heart-broken. They are heart-broken. Everyone who knows them is heart-broken. They were professing believers.
Every time I hear another story like this one, my first thoughts are, “How?” “Why?”
And every story is different. But in this story, and many like it, the wife admits her husband was good to her, but just “didn’t meet all of her emotional needs.” I don’t know the statistics, but I’m guessing this is the most likely reason (excuse) given by women for having affairs.
I know there are struggles and nightmares only the women in those situations can imagine. This post isn’t meant to discourage that woman. I’m specifically talking here about a normal marriage where a husband is loving the best way he knows how.
We are missing one, big, blaring thing:
Our husbands are not meant to, able to, or equipped to meet all our emotional needs and we need to stop expecting them to.
If we were honest, what we really want in our husbands is another woman. You know, a person who instinctively knows when something is wrong, or senses when we’re “off” and probes at our hearts to try to find the reason. Someone sensitive and intuitive and responsive. Yes, that’s a wonderful thing, but it doesn’t come naturally to our men (not most anyway) and that doesn’t mean they are failures at being a husband, thus giving us justification to go have our needs met somewhere else.
And here’s a news flash: whatever need your husband isn’t meeting will likely not be met by the new guy either after the thrill of a taboo rendezvous wears off.
Yes, husbands are commanded to be gentle and kind, even laying down their lives for us. (I’m not trying to gloss over his responsibility or justify his abdication. But my audience isn’t men, so that leaves me with addressing the other side.) Sometimes though, that’s not enough. And in that case, we are not looking to Christ to fulfill what only He can.
I want to challenge myself and you: we cannot let familiarity with our husbands become a catalyst for discontentment. To say “He [the new guy] gives me attention my husband doesn’t” is to state an obvious fact of life. We are all probably more courteous to the guy/girl next to us in the checkout line if a conversation develops. We smile at strangers and put on our best for others. We’re generally nicer and more attentive to people with whom we do not share a life. That’s a given.
The comfort of being one flesh with your spouse cannot be displaced by the heightened enjoyment of another’s attention.
And another thing…
I think that if we spent more time BEING what our spouse needs instead of pining away for what we think we need, we may just find him becoming more attentive and loving.
My earnest prayer for you is to cherish your marriage and if you find yourself dissatisfied and struggling, seek help and counsel, making restoration a top priority. Divorce is tragic and it cannot take place without ripping people apart. God is able to heal and restore and renew the love and commitment made before Him. I pray that we will fight for our marriages with a tenacity that holds on when everything else says to let go.
I am going through a growing time, to put it mildly, where the Lord has used several circumstances in my life to bring me to the end of myself, which, though it feels like an awful place to be (especially for a control freak), it’s actually the ONLY safe place to be. The only place where Christ can reign paramount. The only place where His power has freedom to rule.
Can I encourage you, that when you feel hopeless, that might be the beginning of real Hope.
And while the statement above may seem unrelated to the links below, I have been greatly encouraged, as I go through Nancy Leigh Demoss and Mary Kassian’s “Interior Design” series. Each part is short–just 20 minutes or so, but what it does for me is help transform my mind by renewal (Romans 12) and I am not sure there is anything more important for busy moms and wives to do to stay focused and potent as followers of Christ.
I LOVE this series, and I’m watching them with my girls. (As a caveat, there is some talk about sexual immorality in the “Virtue” segment, which I think is an important topic, even with younger girls, right now.)
Do yourself a favor, set aside a few minutes a day, and be renewed in your walk as a woman of God. This is where our faith is put into shoe leather. I pray you will join me as we intentionally pursue the glory of God in our lives.It is the reason we exist.
Part 1: Discernment
Part2: Honor
Part 3: Affection
Part 4: Discipline
Part 5: Virtue
Part 6: Responsibility
Part 7: Benevolence
Part 8: Disposition
Part 9: Legacy
Part 10: Beauty
A man approaching retirement called the retirement office to inquire about his pension. Afterward, he was asked if his wife worked.
“She’s worked all her life making me happy”, he replied. “Yes sir, but has she earned money to receive her pension?” “When we got married we agreed on an arrangement”, he said. “I would earn the living, and she would make the living worthwhile”.
“Make the living worthwhile.”
Have we forgotten the very essence of that? Have we forgotten to live for someone else, that doing so IS what makes a living worthwhile?
The Lord has really been working in my heart a lot lately about my role as a wife. If I could sum up what I believe makes a happy, time-proof marriage, it would be this:
Live to make your spouse’s life better.
Our natural response may be,“Why should I do that when he doesn’t do that for me?”
And we are so unwilling to take our eyes off of his faults, look at our own shortcomings, and realize we may be a large part of the reason he doesn’t respond to us the way we think he should.
My duty as a wife, and more importantly as a Christian is to be a “living sacrifice”, not as concerned with what I’m getting, than what I can give.
Do you want a joyful home? Be joyful.
Do you want a tender husband? Be tender.
Work on becoming the woman with whom your husband feels MOST secure–even with his greatest weaknesses (boy that’s a hard one!)
He has the whole world to make him feel inadequate, tired, unaccomplished or weak.
If he has one place to go, one person who will guard his reputation, his feelings, his manhood, one person who will make his living worthwhile, that man will run to that place…to that person…he will cherish it and will never leave.
Note: This morning, ironically, after I reposted this article, I ran across the article, Tolkien Speaks: The Secret to a Happy Marriage, in which is written: “What did Tolkien have that many marriages do not? How did he make it work? The answer is simple: He understood that real love involves self-denial.”
“These are virtues that will literally change your outward appearance!”
Our culture has lost its understanding of what makes a woman beautiful and strong. As the egalitarianism increases, the distinctions between the sexes have decreased–and it’s much more than appearance.
This quote by Dabney has caused me to ponder deeply the essence of the female gender, and I think it is astounding how subtly we have let the two sexes almost merge, and, in fact, fight against every shred of effort to keep them gloriously separated!
“…the hot glare of publicity will deflower her delicacy and sweetness…unsexed and denaturalized, shorn of the true glory of her femininity, will appear to men as a feeble hybrid manikin dwarf, with all the defects and none of the strength of the male. Instead of being the dear object of his chivalrous affection, she becomes his importunate rival, despised without being feared!”
God has allowed our own ignorance and covetous hearts to give us exactly the opposite of the thing we strive so vehemently for–worth and value.
The more the feminist agenda is realized, the more women have actually been devalued.
God’s design cannot be improved upon. When will we learn that? Men and women are created much like a seat belt. Both parts equally important, but the whole thing rendered useless if they are each unwilling to embrace their created differences.
Part of that perfect design of woman is the “glory of her femininity.” Some of us think–“Oh, that means wearing a dress.” Well, it could, or you could be just as masculine in a dress. It has much more to do with your understanding and cultivating the inner virtues of the heart; those virtues God has planted to separate you and equip you for your distinct role.
This series will look at about 15 virtues specific to women, mentioned in Scripture, and we’ll discuss what they mean and how we can cultivate those in our own lives. These are virtues that will literally change your outward appearance! And while some of these may be present simply as a result of being a child of God, more often they must be practiced and deliberately improved.
I am guilty of spending far too much time, money and energy trying to improve my outward appearance. And while I believe we are to present ourselves in a pleasant and beautiful way, it is useless if we are not allowing God to beautify our hearts.
So, get ready for your makeover.
Follow these links for the 9-part series!
Make-over: Clothed in Strength and Honor
Make-over: But I’m Not Meek & Quiet!
Make-over: Teacher of Good Things
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