If you have a large family, you know one of the challenges is answering people for the “odd” decision you’ve made to allow God to give you more than two children. And I submit to you, that this is just one of many areas where we can live deliberately, and use the incredible opportunity right in front of us to “shine” in the world.
Based on something Dr. Baucham said in the sermon I posted yesterday, I came up with an answer that I’m going to start using when someone questions me. Devising an answer isn’t boastful or self-righteous; it is a duty to be able to “give an answer for the hope that is within us”. Thinking through situations and having an answer for why we live the way we live is a good thing.
The most common question that is often difficult to answer is “Do you want anymore [children]?”
Voddie Baucham quoted God’s command for the children of Israel while they were slaves in another country. Here’s what He told them:
“Build houses and dwell in them; plant gardens and eat their fruit. Take wives and have sons and daughters; and take wives for your sons and give your daughters to husbands, so that they may bear sons and daughters–that you may be increased there, and not diminished.” Jer.29:5,6
I’ve taken what Baucham says he and his wife say to people who ask about their large family(they now adopt), tweaked it a little, and have come up with a truthful answer that I challenge you to use as well. So, to the question. “Do you want any more?” Or, “Are you going to have anymore?” I am going to begin answering:
“We are going to have, teach, train, love, disciple and launch as many children from our home for the glory of God that we can before we die.”
Simply put, we’re in spiritual warfare, and one of the main weapons God has given His people is more children (arrows). What kind of warrior do we want to be?
Why else would God be constantly admonishing His people to “have more children, and teach them about Me”? Why did he specifically command His people to marry and have children, and so on? Because He wanted His own people to multiply and take dominion!
I’ve actually heard Christians accusing other Christians in a demeaning way for “seeing how many children they can have”. Well? I think that’s an excellent practice given the implications of Scripture! That is, if you understand WHY you are having children–as a dominion-taker. If you don’t want to, OK. But that should make you an even bigger cheerleader for those who do! We’re on the same team, remember? And by God’s economy, more is better!
Dr. Baucham jokingly explained how he wanted as many arrows as possible, as would any warrior in his right mind. “Never mind where I’m going to put them….I’ll find a place–just give me more arrows!”
13 comments
I’m really enjoying the videos of Voddie – he def. has wisdom. I typically don’t watch long talks, but his I made the time for (both part 1 and 2) and thoroughly enjoyed it! Thank you for posting that.
I’ve never heard it put that way! Here I am…cheering you guys with big families on….and hoping to join you one day! (I have found having husband on board to be important!)
What a wonderfully put answer! Thank you!! We only have three “arrows” right now, but we’re already starting to get the “are you done yet?” questions… and I haven’t known how to answer it gracefully, so thank you for such a beautiful and concise answer!
I agree with what you and Dr voddie said after watch the whole video I have more respect of Dr. Voddie I mean I HEARD he was good but now I KNOW he’s good he really get’s me thinking and I like that my church never gets to the depths of things it just makes you “feel good”…I wish more churches preached like Dr. Voddie’s church.
http://www.adlynmorrison.blogspot.com/
Lol I have a seven month old son and am pregnant at 21 weeks with at least one girl. When people hear it’s a girl they say “oh well you’re all done already then”. You should see their eyes when we tell them that the midwife thinks it’s twin girls and also that we want as many as we can get.
To add to my previous comment…my husband works in a school and has had the teachers actually slap him for making his “poor” wife pregnant again so quickly. People are so rude about our joy. They are also trying to tell us that precious little twins are a curse.
I sat down with a family from our church last night just to get to know them (I’m the new Children/Family Pastor). They have just had their first child (who, incidentally, is beautiful!) and found it “refreshing” (to use their word) to hear their pastor talking about how I’d like to have more children even though our seventh is due in a few weeks. They said they weren’t accustomed to hearing pastors talk that way.
It was both sad and encouraging, eh?
Hatushili
I love this post…it really puts a beautiful spin on having a large family and it is good for my husband and I to think about as we await our second child in 4 months. We’ve started out young and I see now reason why we will not be able to have a large family!
As I’ve said before, I love your convictions and boldness and your blog is actually really helping me feel more confident in having Christ-like boldness as I write on my blog! Thank you!:)
Our family was invited to a home-schooler get-together once. We were not home-schoolers and had two children. Apparently these people were quiver-full people. We were amused at how they one-upped each other on how many children they had: “You only have four children?? That’s all??!!” Actually, it was amusing until they started talking about getting guns and taking over the goverment. We got out of there fast and called the FBI when we got home!
We went to a home-schoolers get-together once. (We were not home-schoolers, and only have two children). Apparently, all of these people were quiver-full people, and I was amused as they one-upped each other on how many children they had: “You have four children…that all??!!”
I definitely agree we want as many as God will bless us with, however couldn’t you take it too far?
I wouldn’t want to accidentally encourage someone to go on a mission to have the most children possible in a lifetime. As you know you can stop breastfeeding (God’s perfect baby milk)too soon causing your fertility to come back prematurely. I do not know many families who do this, at least not intentionally, but I do know of a few. Isn’t this practice a form of birth control? Taking your family size out of the control of the Lord’s?
If you nourish babies by offering the best of what God has to offer then you should get that perfect number. Right?
If we claim we want the most possible, we should consider fertility drugs so we may produce multiples at each birthing. (I am using a ridiculous example to prove the point.)
Maybe be should say we want God’s perfect number of arrows for our quiver and we are allowing Him to decide.
I just don’t want to misrepresent large families by leading others to believe they are on a birthing binge.
Love this blog!
Misty,
Of course…I think it’s just as much “controlling” to try to manipulate your body, etc. in attempts to have more children. Our philosophy is simply allowing God to be sovereign. I don’t even think about it. Meaning, I don’t keep up with cycles, I don’t have a magic age when I stop nursing, etc.
I will make an interesting note here though…go back and read (I think Leviticus?) God’s laws regarding resuming relations after a woman’s cycle. She is “unclean” for he duration, and seven days after. They are allowed to resume on the 14th day of the month. Guess when that usually falls? The day of ovulation. *Smile*
I am trying to locate the sermon from this? Could you point me in the direction?