pregnancy/birth control

This subject, from the angle I’m writing, could really be separated into two categories: the birth control industry and accompanying mindset, and the careful, prayerful fertility life of a couple.

While I may have my personal practices and opinions about fertility, I’m not posting about this matter to convince every couple that they should never ever space their children or consider certain, unique situations in their lives. That is not the aim here.

But rather, that people would think about their fertility in a light perhaps they never have before. The BC industry has a destructive, anti-life agenda. There is a plethora of proof for that.

And since they have crusaded for so long to brainwash the masses, I believe with all my heart that Christians need to be talking about a different angle. We need to be speaking about the sacredness of life, and Who is really in control, etc.

Let couples make their personal decisions before the Lord with fear and trembling. But not until their thinking is right…”and how will they know unless someone tells them?”

(Addendum)

The last comment “unless someone tells them” is not meant to imply that I’m trying to assert my personal opinions about BC. The thing I’m referring to that they need to be “told” is the basic, undeniable truth about the sacredness of life. “For YOU have formed my inward parts…I will praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” From Psalm 139

Not an opinion…just truth.

Inevitably a hot topic. When I post about this topic, it really makes me think deeply. Sometimes I let doubt creep in, because I am so passionate about it, and I would hate to be passionate about something that doesn’t matter. Sometimes I think, “Maybe God doesn’t really have an opinion about this at all. Maybe He has left it completely up to us to decide.”

And then another thought…

God not have an opinion? You mean, indifference toward life? What am I? A Life? Does He have an opinion about me? Was it such a strong one that He sent His only Son to be a ransom for my soul? My immortal, eternal soul?

Life…immortal…eternal…HEAVY.

Do I really believe God doesn’t have an opinion about the way we handle life? Do I count a fertilized egg as a scientific blimp that I *forgot* to prevent? Do I consider a baby in my womb another “decision” to make…or avoid?

Or do I look at life as eternal, immortal–the way God looks at it. And if I see life for what it is, doesn’t that change drastically the way I handle it? Think about it? Treat it?

It’s time to revisit this topic…it is such a deep affliction to me when I see the world’s attitude toward children. And not just children, but toward our smug ability to “control” them. (The very word “control” reminding me of using pesticides or something.)

And I think this is why I’m so black and white about birth control. I really don’t mean to be. I really try to stick to the positive side of the issue…and only talk about the blessing of children through God’s eyes.

I know all the side roads…”what about a mother’s health?” and “I have this friend that had as many children as God gave her, and she died with the last one and left her husband with 17 to raise”…and the other 1 in a million such stories. But those stories don’t justify the much worse dilemma: our culture’s hatred of children.

Here’s the crux: when someone calls me in tears expecting her third child, and I ask, “why are you crying” and she tells me of the mistreatment from friends and coworkers and how “out of control” it all feels, and how her world seems upside down, what am I left to conclude about the supposed “neutral” issue of birth control?

I know not every situation is as extreme. But think with me honestly…if birth control is neutral, just an option, why are most women made to feel like they’ve grown two heads if they have more than 2 children? Or if they somehow were so “irresponsible” to let one slip by? WHY???

How can we embrace the right, and the necessity, and the “privilege” of preventing children on one hand, but still be completely delighted for those who would accept more than 2 children from God on the other? Or be thrilled to learn we are expecting, even though we were trying to prevent it? The two seem diametrically opposed.

I know a few people who are not there. I have friends who have personally chosen to stop having children, who, (at least to my face 😉 are so excited for us when we announce we’re expecting. I’m so grateful for those friends.

But that isn’t the reception I’m running into in most places, INCLUDING the church. And it’s not the stories I’m hearing from others.

I just want to stand on the roof and say:

“WE DON’T MAKE BABIES!!! WE CAN ONLY PREVENT LIFE. IT IS GOD WHO CREATES LIFE. GOD SAW FIT THAT A WOMAN SHOULD GENERALLY HAVE SEVERAL CHILDREN IN HER LIFETIME. GOD DECIDED THAT SOMEWHERE AROUND THE AGE OF 45 WAS A GOOD TIME TO STOP.”

And here’s where we are…we are SO arrogant that because we CAN prevent children, that because we think we are in complete control of our lives, no one gives God even a smidgen of glory when He overrides our decision and blesses us anyway! We stomp and fuss and say “it’s not fair” about the greatest gift a human can receive.

How did we get here?

This is important…I think it’s worth the reading and pondering 🙂

Everything’s connected…that’s my theory about how the universe operates. I think the scientific explanation says something like “for every action there is an opposite an equal reaction”…or maybe that isn’t it at all, but I vaguely remember something like that from Science class 🙂

Why do I “harp” about things like birth control, women in the work force, and other issues related to feminism? Why am I willing to go against the current so regularly? Believe it or not, it’s not just a way I get my kicks.

In my finite understanding of the world around me, I see an ever-changing, perpetually moving current of thought, action and consequence. And for whatever negative situation is at hand at the moment, it can be chased back to a diverting from God’s prescribed laws for living.

In other words, for every negative consequence we experience now, somewhere, at some point, it can be traced back to wrong thinking, wrong choices or wrong behavior, measured by God’s standards.

That’s what makes the issue of birth control so tricky to me. Someone has asked, “do you think it is a sin to prevent children”…I can’t answer “yes” to that. But I can see principles from Scripture that indicate that the common practice of preventing children can lead to a multitude of problems, both personally, and corporately as a society.

So, when someone says “if birth control is not a sin, why don’t you leave everyone alone and let them make a personal decision”…I struggle with that. Because I see it as a personal decision only for a moment; and then I see how that personal decision quickly blossoms into a societal problem.

Example:

God set forth tons of laws for His people in the OT. Laws like, if your house has mold on it, wash it with water, but if the mold spreads to a certain degree, burn the house down.

There are many like that one…how to handle disputes over lost cattle, what to do if someone strikes a woman…etc.

Seems a bit tedious. AND, not observing that law did not constitute sin exactly. But the implications from not practicing that part of the cleansing ritual had a huge impact on the people–and could even cause death. And those implications spread as more and more people failed to observe it.

The laws were for their good; if they did not obey them, they only hurt themselves.

I think of this issue of BC a little like that…principles have been set forth (in the mere law of nature, if nowhere else), and God’s Word is full of the confirmation of His design to give His people children. The actual failure to accept children may not be a sin; but the implications could bring curses that multiply the more widely the practice of preventing children spreads.

A wise, older gentleman and I were talking the other day; he accurately pointed out that the downfall of our nation was at hand, because, in a nutshell, our land was full of foreigners who worship other gods. We have ceased to be a Christian nation because we allow that worship of other gods. And we have become a “tolerant” people, refusing to protect the name of our one true God.

Newsflash: God is not tolerant. Not even a little bit. The one thing that He became outraged at the fastest was following after other gods.

Now bear with me as I connect the dots…

The gentleman went on to say that one of the reasons for the streaming in of these pagan cultures is that Americans have an insatiable appetite for “stuff”. So much so, that the entire culture is driven by consumerism. We want, we buy, and businesses become greedy and begin to export cheaper goods from foreign nations, changing our relationships with them, etc. (I’m no expert in foreign affairs, I’m just giving a very sketchy outline.)

At the root of it all, he said, is “the love of money”. That’s the root of the evil, just as was predicted from Scripture.

Immediately, my mind connected another dot. Maybe, just maybe, when God commanded us to be fruitful and multiply, there were many protective elements, for our good, wrapped up in the command.

Maybe, unlike the “how can you afford more children” quip, God knew that a house full of children might divert our attention some from such a materialistic lifestyle. That being wealthy could become a curse, and being stretched a little thin sometimes might not be a bad thing.

Maybe large families would be prone to successful industry, changing the whole dynamics of the commercialized world.

Maybe having more children would protect the economy by preventing 2-household incomes.

Maybe there are all kinds of implications! And just maybe, this one area that we have taken away from God has proven to be disastrous in ways we are not even aware.

Connecting the dots is so important to affecting the way we live our lives. We have to look ahead to where we want to go, in order to determine now how we should live.

These are the things I lie awake at night and think about…therefore, I blog.

This Sunday, our family will be celebrating Mallory’s seventh birthday.Her birth is not only the celebration of her life, but of every child that has been born after her. We celebrate seven years with four more babies than we had planned.

Before Mallory was even a thought, Ken and I had “decided” that two children was enough. Two kids is a good round number. They would be assured of plenty of parental attention. Whenever we were out and about,we could each keep tabs on one child. They would each have a playmate. We thought this was the best thing for our family. A family of four. Perfect. Or so we thought. So, we were prepared for life as a family of four.

Enter Mallory.

Months of morning sickness, the thought of another horrendous hospital birth, an over-crowded floating home on a lake, more mouths to feed on a very small income . . .what is God thinking??? Does He not know our situation?

Realization sets in. He knows better than we do?! How arrogant of us to think that we know better than Almighty God. Of course He can provide for every child He creates.

Of course He can give Ken and I strength and wisdom to parent every child He gives us. Of course. How could we believe any different? How merciful He is to override our plans to limit our family size! Our minds have been transformed. We know, WE KNOW, that every child is a GIFT from God. We ask Him for more children because they are blessings, the very best blessings He bestows upon us. And God is faithful. Not only has He shown us time and time again how much He cares for our family by providing for every need and nearly every want, He also continues to gently guide our thinking and conform us to the image of His Son.

We are so thankful that God had other plans. We are so grateful that He allowed us to see the audacity of our own limited thinking.We are so amazed that He continues to entrust these incredible children into our hands.We are awed by the grace He provides as He daily trains us to be parents.We are humbled by the enormous responsibility we have to not only train our children, but to train them to train their own children, who will in turn train their children to serve the Lord. We are inspired by the beauty of our children’s blossoming character and the future of Christianity that they represent. This world NEEDS our children. This world NEEDS your children.

As I sit here in tears thanking God for His mercy upon me, for His goodness in giving such abundant blessings to us, I also pray that He will continue to give Ken and I the grace to raise these beautiful children to be powerhouses in this world — that they will be bright lights in this ever-darkening place. Thank you, Lord, for Mallory. Thank you for this child that has literally transformed our family for generations to come. Because of her, we will raise an ARMY for the Lord. And thank you for Abby, for Madison, for Gabriel, for Marjorie, for Emmele, and for all of those blessings yet to come. We are richly, richly blessed!

This may end up being a hodge-podge of thoughts….I have recently heard about some things going on in Europe, from different sources, though all are related and may indicate a trend that our country is headed for if we don’t fight.

And of course, in my opinion, feminism is at the root. Feminism, and every other “ism” that Satan himself is the author of.

A missionary from Europe spoke at our church about the eminent take-over of Islam in Europe over the next few years. Do you know why? Because Islamics reproduce the way they were created to, and Europeans don’t. Now there’s a novel idea!

And get this…it was reported that an American missionary asked an Islamic man why they had so many children. His reply? “Because we believe in God.” What do you think of that?

The missionary concluded by saying, “It really comes down to one simple thing: the one with the most babies wins!” Is it any wonder? Aren’t God’s plans always right? When we start altering things, based on our own personal “wisdom”, we inadvertently change the course of mankind. WOW.

Another tragedy going on in Europe is the hostility toward homeschoolers, particularly in Germany. Many of you have been aware, I’m sure, of families over there undergoing persecution for their choice to homeschool.

Currently, there is a family, the Neubonners, who have just had their personal and business banking accounts FROZEN BY THE GOVERNMENT because they didn’t pay penalty fines imposed on them for refusing to send their sons to the state school. Isn’t it ironic that the government is “so concerned with the welfare of these boys” that they could care less whether they starve to death, as long as they’re being indoctrinated by the state?! You can read their story HERE.

But the worst part of it all is that in the past, Europe is about 10 years ahead of the US in every area…art, entertainment, fashion, and culture. Can you see the writing on the wall?

There is a reason my blog name is WORD WARRIOR. My birth name, Kelly, means “warrior”. For those of you who believe that a child’s name has a bearing on the kind of person he becomes, it rings true in my case. I struggle constantly with desiring a quiet and gentle spirit, and yet feeling this warrior-type spirit within me. I’ve asked the Lord to help me be the quiet and gentle woman His word describes, and yet use whatever this passion within me is for His glory. This blog, I think, is part of the result of that prayer.

I hope, in some way, to be able to use words, since that is what the Lord has given me, to fight against the gates of hell in this nation. I hope I stir others up to fight…as women, in whatever realm He gives us. Most of you are mothers…and isn’t it a blessed hope for our nation that we have been given the incredible opportunity to “assist God in a miracle” by giving birth? And isn’t it wonderfully true that “the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world”?

Europe is about to experience the truth of that reality.

Here is Mandy’s choice of topic for debate…

What I want to know is why female family members get so upset that my husband and I are having lots of children (and only three as of now!). We don’t give them the cold shoulder because they chose to have only one and have a career instead! That really gets to me. I don’t ever say anything negative to them or anyone else about their choice, but I get eye rolls and anger when announcing a new pregnancy and the silent treatment. It really hurts me.