Author

Kelly Crawford

Hello! I’m Kelly and I’m glad you’re here. I’m a wife and mom, just like you. I get it. I know how hard the days can be, and how you might feel like you’re spinning your wheels or that no one sees or appreciates your work.

Ode to The Virus

by Kelly Crawford February 26, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

4th Victim…

Male. 4 years-old.

Blond hair, blue eyes.

Last seen at 1 a.m. vomiting from the couch while his mother tries to catch it with trash can…repeat every 30 minutes.

Ode to the Virus

I don’t like you,just so you know,

Let’s get that squared away…

You barged in here–unwelcome guest,

Unpacked your bags to stay.

Our laundry is ridiculous–

Blankets, towels and sheets,

You figured out just how to make sure

No one gets to sleep!

Or worse, you tease me with an hour

Make me think we’re done,

And then–you’re favorite time of night–

Vomit hits at one!

Fevers, chills, no appetite,

You’ve got ’em up your sleeve,

I’ve had about all I can take,

Now pack your bags and leave!

February 26, 2009 6 comments

pregnancy/birth control

Birth Without Violence…A Compelling Read

by Kelly Crawford February 26, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

While I’ve had a lot of time to sit and hold babies, I’ve read through a short book my friend, Jennie, loaned me. No doubt many of you have heard of it? It is “Birth Without Violence” by Frederick LeBoyer.

The book is a paradox all its own. Simply written–almost poetically written, about a simple subject, yet so profound and compelling all at the same time.

It almost slaps you in the face and says, “of course…this should be instinctive”.

In a very small nutshell, Dr. LeBoyer suggests that we traumatize babies at their birth, possibly inflicting life-long consequences, all because we assume the baby doesn’t remember or that his entrance into life doesn’t matter. Then he gives the practical picture of how he believes babies should be born. The changes in procedure are relatively small and certainly simple, and yet have such huge implications, according to LeBoyer.

Admittedly, some of what he says is a little extreme to me. And yet, one must give him the benefit of the doubt, because there is so much truth there too, and the burden of proof lies with his opponents.

His revelation about the physiological intrusion of cutting the umbilicus too early was particularly riveting.

I’ll let you decide…if you want to read it, I found an on-line version. It really only takes an hour or so to read–and easy to grasp the message if only skimmed. Here is the link: Birth Without Violence

I would LOVE to discuss this with others as it has rather captured my thoughts since reading it. One can see why so many are opposed to hospital births after reading such thoughts.

It has changed, even further, what we intend to request in our birth plan…pray they don’t think I’m a kook.

February 26, 2009 28 comments

large families motherhood/family/parenting

Sickness on the House

by Kelly Crawford February 24, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

I try not to whine but…

What’s worse than the “throw-up virus” in a large family?

The throw-up flu, I suppose–especially when three little ones have it at the same time!

This is our morning–after virtually neither of us slept because we had these two in our rooms suffering from coughs, fevers, etc. Kyla was up all night, and then, right about the time they got settled (it was daylight by then) and we drifted off into what felt like our first bit of real sleep,

Avi made it to our room before she threw up–and woke the two littles 😉

OK, so maybe I don’t try too hard not to whine.

“Here ya go, Kelly, a chance to live out that ‘giving all of yourself” you’ve been bloggin’ about.”

Careful what you say.

I am thankful for opportunities to die to my flesh, just not at the moment they arrive 😉

We thought it was the stomach bug, but after the first sickie came down with fever, bad cough and feeling miserable for more than a day, we decided it’s probably the flu.

For the record, we just had the stomach virus less than a month ago. If I had blogged about that, you would have found out that my seven-year-old, who gets terrified when she gets sick, didn’t throw up in the boat-sized container I strategically placed by her bed…oh no, she threw up right on top of her sister’s head who sleeps below her in the trundle. Great 2-in-the morning fun!

For a family our size, the stomach bug means quarantine for like a year. It’s at least a month-long cabin-fever sentence. It’s really hard to describe unless you’ve attended 2 or 3 at a time, all throwing up, some crying, some running around spraying Lysol and opening windows–and you know that it will strike again, and again, and again, until it’s run the whole gamut of people who live here.

One time, Aaron, I AND Bria, the oldest, were deathly sick with some awful virus at the same time–literally unable to move. I remember just lying there praying, “Lord keep them safe”, while the 6-year old in charge at the time handed out rounds of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

If I ever DID choose a bad reason for having large families, this would be it.

Today has consisted of little more than holding babies–sometimes two at a time, trying desperately to distract them, praying, and wishing I could take their place. It’s an ironic combination of motherly bliss and exhaustion.

I write this blog in my pajamas…the ones I was wearing when I got up this morning.

I asked Avi if I could hold her…she said in the weakest voice, “No, I don’t want you to get sick”.

This is as much misery for a mother as the ones who are sick, I think. But I am ALWAYS brought to gratitude when we get sick…that it is temporary. And my heart aches for those who are struggling with chronic or terminal illness with no end in sight.

This, too, shall pass.

P.S. My darling husband handed me some money tonight after supper and said, “You and Bria run into town for dessert–y’all need a break.” He is the true servant in our family.

February 24, 2009 37 comments

motherhood/family/parenting political public school

They’ve Banned Tag–Yes, the Game–Because Kids Were Chasing Each Other

by Kelly Crawford February 23, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

Love Glenn Beck…can’t help it. Yeah, I know he’s Mormon. He’s also smart, he’s got a backbone and a brain. A rarity among media-types these days. I’ve copied and pasted a few of my favorite pieces from him for posts here and there. I’m so glad he’s still allowed on prime time television.

This radio show transcript is just too funny, and sad, all at the same time. The last paragraph is the best.

GLENN: Colorado schools have banned tag on its playgrounds. I’m having a hard time with this one. For as evil as I think tag is, you know, I worked tirelessly to make sure we didn’t do dodge ball. Dodge ball, they are throwing a ball at you. How are you expected to survive, you know? Red Rover, Red Rover, send so-and-so right over? I was never picked. It lowered my self-esteem. I mean, he was always the last guy. Red Rover, Red Rover, send anybody but Glenn over. Can you check in the classroom, see if there’s anybody doing their homework. Where’s Arnold? Can you call Arnold’s mom, see if he can come out to play because we definitely don’t want anybody — we don’t want anybody named Glenn to come right over. Oh, it’s tragic. So hopefully we can get Red Rover, Red Rover banned as well.

A Colorado school has banned tag because some children complained that they were being chased.

Just a second. I’m sorry. I just want to — they’re playing tag. Tag, tag, tag… tag, and they were being chased. Well, what will they think of next? Now kids are chasing each other during tag. My gosh, what’s next. One of the assistant principals of the Discovery Canyon school — may I ask, please tell me, Colorado, that’s called Discovery Canyon that that’s the town or the area? It’s not like, hi, welcome to Discovery Canyon School; you can discover all kinds of things. Doesn’t that just sound politically correct?

She says that the running games will still be allowed as long as you don’t chase each other. May I ask you a question? When you were in the third grade, isn’t that pretty much what you did all day? When you would go out and you’d play on the playground, you’d chase each other? Right now Cheyenne just learned how to walk and every day I look down at my — I look down at my webcam and for, like, an hour all they’re doing around the house is chasing each other around our — we have this enormous coffee table in our living room, and all they’re doing is chasing each other around the coffee table. That’s what happens with kids. That’s what they do. And I don’t know if you’ve missed the — well, I haven’t seen tag’s rules in quite some time, but isn’t that it? They chase you? You try to outrun them so you’re not it and then when you are it, you chase somebody?

Here’s an idea. Kids, if you don’t want to be chased, stop running. Then they’ll tag you. Then you chase them! That way they can have their attorneys call your parents and sue you for chasing them as opposed to your attorneys suing them for chasing you. It’s incredible.

Two parents have complained about the ban on tag but most parents and children didn’t object, the assistant principal said. Yeah. You know why? That’s because they’re all dead now. They’re all just, their souls have been sucked out of them. They just might as well, they’re in their house now and they see on the news… “Oh, looks like they’ve banned tag” and they’re just sitting in their living room, of course we ban tag; I mean, why not ban tag. Kids are being chased. Honey, do we have anything in the house that I can overdose on?

I mean, that’s what’s happening to us! We’re not complaining anymore because we know it won’t make a difference! We’re sheep. Banning tag.

February 23, 2009 41 comments

christian living motherhood/family/parenting

A Mother’s Life: The Profoundest of Classrooms

by Kelly Crawford February 23, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

“I will spend myself to the last ebb for you; you may give me praise or give me blame, it will make no difference…When we realize that Jesus Christ has served us to the end of our meanness, our selfishness, and sin, nothing that we meet with from others can exhaust our determination to serve men for His sake.” -Oswald Chambers

Aaron read this devotion from “My Utmost for His Highest” this morning, and oh the sting of the realization that servant hood is so completely counter to my nature.

And yet I know that my greatest job on earth is to press into my children, like a mold, the image of Christ, and that image, in a word, is SERVANT.

That’s what He came for–to serve, to be spent, and to lay down His life. And that is what He asks from us. That is why the world hates Him so; because in our flesh, this is detestable. Being “abased” as Paul said he was willing to do, is not en vogue.

Because we live in a culture that SCREAMS the antithesis of Jesus’s teachings–in a culture that says, “Look out for you“, raising children to be servants takes all the more intensity of effort.

We must fight against our own tendencies to pamper and coddle them, and keep the goal fixed in place–raising up real warriors for Christ means raising servants who are willing to empty themselves for others, without any expectations–the greatest irony of human nature.

So mothers, does your job feel menial–the scrubbing of toilets, the wiping of noses, the changing of diapers? If you will only perform these tasks with humility, tenderness and contentment, your life has become the profoundest of classrooms, and your children will become the wisest of students.

February 23, 2009 13 comments

humor motherhood/family/parenting pregnancy/birth control

My One-of-a-Kind Birthing Plan ;-)

by Kelly Crawford February 20, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

As we continue to lean toward a natural childbirth (details in THIS post), I’ve been fairly concerned with the hospital staff’s cooperation. Not that I’ve ever felt the nurses at our hospital are necessarily against it, but I know that typical hospital protocol is not that friendly to natural child birth.

AND, I’m guessing that opposition to our choices are not going to be well-received while I’m in the throes of labor *SMILE*, so I’ve been thinking about how best to head off any contention from the beginning.

I had a brilliant idea in my sleep (that’s where my best thinking occurs 😉 Instead of my first thoughts of a detailed, firmly-stated birthing plan which might likely be lumped in with all the other “Oh great, one of those again” plans, I decided to write a light-hearted, rhyming plan! Is that not a great idea?

So, here’s what I’ve come up with so far:

Our Birth Plan

I’ve given birth to seven babes, and six were here with you,
But now it’s time for number eight and we’re trying something new!

I’ve always been an epi girl, love that needle-man!
But natural is my choice this time, so here’s my birthing plan!

I’ll need your comfort and support, I’m glad to give birth here,
But I prefer no needles or machines to interfere.

(Unless of course, though very rare, a problem does arise,
at which point, if we’re informed, we’ll gladly heed advice.)

We’re eager to embrace this journey as the Lord intends,
and ask for freedom as my body leads us to the end.

The end of the beginning, for this precious girl or boy,
We say a great big “THANK YOU” for sharing in our joy!

P.S. No copyright infringement exists; feel free to use it if you wish!
P.S.S. I reserve the right to change my mind about the natural thing despite my cute plan 😉

February 20, 2009 35 comments

marriage

How Can a Wife Cope with an Unbelieving Husband?

by Kelly Crawford February 19, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

I have had more than 3 or 4 readers who have asked me virtually the same, difficult question:

“How do you train your children and homeschool with an unsaved husband?”

And I would imagine that these ladies represent a large group of women out there.

I’ll be honest…my heart breaks for the women who have to ask this question, and I’m not sure I have many answers. But this blog receives quite a bit of traffic, and just maybe, in God’s providence, this is a place where desperate questions of the heart can meet answers from those who have walked the same path.

Just maybe, the Lord has put you here for “such a time as this” to encourage and help other women–more I’m sure than even the 3 or 4 I’ve heard from–as they labor down this lonely, terrifying road.

As I think and pray for answers, of course the familiar Scripture comes to mind about “winning the unbelieving husband without a word, with a meek and quiet spirit”. I’ve always thought this must be the hardest thing in the world to do, and yet it is the wisdom of Scripture.

It’s hard enough sometimes to be a cheerful wife when your husband is “on board”. But I would imagine cheerfulness would be a tremendous testimony to an unbelieving husband. (Debi Pearl’s book Created to Be His Helpmeet talks a lot about the importance of that.)

I believe few things to be of more importance than a praying wife. Really, probably most of us don’t pray enough. But the wife of an unbeliever must rely so much more heavily on the Spirit in order to maintain peace and contentment. “The fervent prayers of the righteous availeth much.”

May Lemke, the mother of the severely handicapped child in the book “May’s Boy”, said of her son’s miracle…”I bugged God all my life…I guess He finally gave in.”

This may not be accurate theology, but she emphasized how she prayed fervently for what she wanted and refused to give up until her prayers were answered. I think there is a lot of merit in that kind of praying.

I would ask two things of you…

If you have wisdom for these dear ladies, would you please share it? And secondly, would you commit (as I will) to pray more, not only for our own families, but would you lift these sisters, their husbands and their families up too?

February 19, 2009 50 comments

frugal living/saving money

Thrifty Thursday Thoughts…

by Kelly Crawford February 19, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

“The heart of her husband safely trusts in her…” Prov. 31:11

This verse carries over into very practical areas of our lives, including how we handle the family’s income.

I’ve been compiling a group of recipes/tips for baking from scratch and saving money in the kitchen, and I hope it evolves into an ebook soon 😉

Many women had little experience in the kitchen growing up and are rather impaired, through no fault of their own, when it comes to being resourceful and preparing delicious yet economical meals.

Making a white sauce.

One simple tip I learned years ago was how to make a white sauce; some call it a “roux” which can take the place of canned soup. Any recipe that calls for canned soup (which is full of MSG) can be substituted with the versatile rue.

I start with a stick of butter, melt it in a skillet and then add about 2 Tbls. of flour. Stir the flour around until it gets lumpy and then add chicken broth or milk, depending on what kind of sauce you want. (Adding milk basically makes gravy.)

This is the basic base, but you can add many things for flavoring and variety. Onions, garlic, mushrooms, wine, and sour cream are some things I add from time to time. (I saute the onions, garlic and mushrooms in the butter before adding other ingredients.)

You can also use heavy cream or half and half instead of milk, or make the base without even using the flour (I would use the cream or sour cream) and just cook until it thickens.

This sauce can be poured over chicken, pasta or rice for a delicious meal. Experiment with it and you’ll see how easy it is to adjust and use in dishes!

For the Valentine’s banquet we hosted last week, we made Chicken Marsala, using a variety of this sauce. My friend’s recipe included using butter and olive oil to saute garlic and mushrooms. Then I added Marsala wine, and then some heavy cream and sour cream.

Seventy-five pieces of chicken in Marsala sauce!

I found that cooking my chicken and pouring the sauce over it to marinate overnight produced the most flavorful results. Yummy! We served it with mashed potatoes, but you can serve it with pasta or rice too.

Let me know if you have a creative version or meal using white sauce!

February 19, 2009 21 comments

motherhood/family/parenting pregnancy/birth control

So, What Do You Think of Natural Childbirth?

by Kelly Crawford February 17, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

Here’s my big announcement…

I’m thinking of going natural with this delivery (I hear gasps from those who know me).

I know you natural girls will find this amusing, but I am an epidural-lovin’ girl..always have been. When the doctor says, “Call me when you’re on your way to the hospital“, I’m like, “Don’t worry about calling the doctor…is the anesthesiologist on stand-by?”

But, if I am anything, I am a woman who doesn’t want to make blind choices, just because someone else does something, or just because it’s considered “normal” or culturally acceptable. I question. I study. I dig. I pray. I research.

But this is one area I admit to which I haven’t given this kind of attention. So, I’ll just say I’m on a journey to learn all I can. And at the end of it, regardless of our decision, I want to be able to say that I am making a thoroughly thought-out choice that I can back up.

Daja, from Gombojav tribe has been so gracious to post a great series on natural childbirth after my challenge to her to “convince me”.

Daja is a doula and child-birth instructor, and when I was desperately wanting to induce labor with my last child, she was so sweet to give me all kinds of ideas about how to do that naturally, though I’ve never met her ! (Don’t you just love that about blog world?)

I’m open to any and all opinions you have, whether you are a natural girl or one not ashamed to say you love drugs 😉

By the way, in my state, midwives only practice “undercover” and they are few and far between. They are not covered, legally, so a home-birth is more difficult, though not impossible.

I will also add, that even though we’re considering natural childbirth, we really love our “vacation” at the hospital, as my husband calls it. Two days of television, food and being waited on…it’s hard to beat. So we’re not leaning toward the home-birth experience, just a physically natural one.

I’m also anticipating the obstacles I know I’ll face in a hospital if I do go natural…I’m already put out at all the unnecessary protocol at the hospital, and little by little, we have managed to reduce that with each birth.

So, there ya go! My friends Kathy and Robin caught wind of my thoughts (actually, I’m begging Robin to “go first”) and have decided it would be the ultimate coolness to do a virtual, live video for the blog, LOL! At least there would be no turning back, huh?

February 17, 2009 75 comments

marriage

Is He a Hero to Everyone But You?

by Kelly Crawford February 16, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

“Seems I’m a hero to everyone but my wife…”

That was one of the lines from the movie Fireproof–perhaps a line that could encapsulate what so many marriages suffer.

I have been guilty. I struggle with appreciating my husband when there is so much to appreciate!

So many men find that others look up to them, appreciate them, respect them, think they’re talented and enjoy being with them, only to come home and feel unappreciated, not talented, not welcomed and disrespected.

It’s the only thing they really want–to be respected and appreciated. And it’s what wives often find the hardest to give.

Just like the movie, so many people wake up one day to find that things *suddenly* aren’t working. But, “it’s a slow fade…people never crumble in a day.”

Ladies, we can fireproof our marriages if we simply commit to appreciating our husbands. Try some lightheartedness, some forgiveness–the kind that overlooks a habit or weakness.

He wants to be your hero. And if he’s not, he’ll slowly shut down. Our families are worth losing all of ourselves to keep. Be his biggest fan!

On Valentine’s Day, we outfitted the banquet room connected to our house with a movie screen (my husband was brilliant 😉

With the help of a great team of youth from our church, we catered and served a romantic, candlelight dinner to around 54 of our friends and then watched Fireproof. I wish we had taken pictures of the dinner! At serving time, we were so busy it slipped my mind!

Here are the few pictures we thought to snap before dinner–there were so many hands on deck, I wish I had gotten more pictures.

It was so much fun, and I pray a blessing to everyone as much as it was to us. If you haven’t seen the movie, I highly recommend it, again! We may even purchase some to give away.

February 16, 2009 22 comments

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