“With the sole care of so large a family, the religious instruction in the home was not so thoroughly doctrinal as in some households of today, but the mother instructed her children in the true religion of the heart that seeks first God and His righteousness;
“It was also one of the irrevocable laws of her home that no fault-finding or complaining of neighbors or friends would be tolerated. The mother thus implanted in the children a spirit of independence as well as charity; and even those whose neglect was most inexcusable never heard directly or indirectly one word of complaint from the little family in their want and adversity. Dwight Moody was not the only Yankee boy who could look back on that combination of charity for others with inflexible independence for one’s self that has made the New England character what it is.”
Dwight L. Moody
8 comments
I seem to have completely missed the boat on the no fault finding area. Could you give me advice on how this should look in real life. For example my girls look up to their older girl cousin, they are all Christians, the cousin became pregnant at age 14 and has made poor choice after poor choice much of it advice from her also Christian mother. My girls had this cousin on a pedestal and I continue to point out the errors and how they impact her life , I think if I was not critical and pointed out these cause and effect situations my girls would have continued in happily in holding her up as a role model. We do love her and pray for her and welcome her when she visits but my girls know the trouble her choices bring on herself and her family, I am not sure they would catch this on their own at young ages especially as she is beautiful and has attractive clothing and lots of handsome boyfriends.Believe me I was no saint either but seeing it played out in front of their eyes must make more impact than the stories of “mother back in the OLDEN days”.Advice if you want ,I am willing to hear it.
I think it is so important to teach our children to be responsible and not to play the blame game.
Karen, I feel for your position. I’ve got the same problem with a step- daughter. It got so bad that she is not allowed around our younger children until she gets her life staightened out. She does “what works for her” even knowing what a bad decision it is. It is a hard road but we have to protect these young children’s hearts.
You can teach compassion and intercessional prayer while still maintaining your distance. I most definitely would not allow her to be alone with my young children.
Through Biblical teaching my children can read the book of Proverbs and see her bad choices from scripture. We don’t condemn but we also see the truth of the situation. Our prayer is that one day she will come to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ and repent.
Blessings.
Well I haven’t kept her away from my children I don’t feel led to do that at all, I just always make a comment to my girls when I see the cause and effect so that they see it, yet I don’t feel comfortable using her as an “example” even as I do . I probably need to memorize a couple bible verses and leave off names. Or I need to just shut up. My girls tend to see her life like a romantic tragedy.
I’d definitly discourage the romantic tradegy thing. Romancing sin just makes is easier to accept.
I don’t use her as an example but my childen know enough of the situation to see it themselves. They know what their Daddy thinks about it as well as what I think. I think knowing what Daddy thinks has had more of an impact than anything else. Does your husband ever speak to them about their cousins bad decisions?
Karen,
I think the “no fault-finding” that is spoken of Mrs. Moody is not the same as helping our children distinguish between right and wrong. And yet, we can look on those (family or not) with compassion, praying for their salvation and loving them, and still recognizing that a life lived apart from God will have apparent consequences. It’s a delicate balance, to be sure, requiring our wisdom at every turn. I think we all deal with these circumstances.
Thank you !
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