The poetic charges in his book, The Family, by JR Miller often seem out of reach to me. And yet they draw me. I can read only a bit at a time, and though convicted by my own shortcomings, I am yet spurred to recognize this honor and power I have as a wife and to keep determined to let God polish me as He sees fit, submitting to Him and giving all that I have to walk in obedience each day.
“It is a high honor for a woman to be chosen from among all womankind to be the wife of a good and true man. She is lifted up to be a crowned queen. Her husband’s manly love laid at her feet exalts her to the throne of his life. Great power is placed in her hands. Sacred dispositions are reposed in her keeping. Will she wear her crown beneficently? Will she fill her realm with beauty and with blessing? Or will she fail in her holy trust? Only her married life can be the answer.
A woman may well pause before she gives her hand in marriage, and inquire whether he is worthy to whom she is asked to surrender so much; whether he can bring true happiness to her life; whether he can meet the cravings of her nature for love and for companionship; whether he is worthy to be lifted to the highest place in her heart and honored as a husband should be honored. She must ask these questions for her own sake, else the dream may fade with the bridal wreath, and she may learn, when too late, that he for whom she has left all and to whom she has given all is not worthy of the sacred trust, and has no power to fill her life with happiness, to wake her heart’s chords to touch her soul’s depths.
But the question should be turned and asked from the other side. Can she be a true wife to win who asks for her hand? Is she worthy of the love that is laid at her feet? Can she be a blessing to the life of him who would lift her to the throne of his heart? Will he find in her all the beauty, all the tender loveliness, all the rich qualities of nature, all the deep sympathy and companionship, all the strengthful, uplifting love, all the sources of joy and help, which he seems now to see in her?
Surely it is proper for her to question her own soul for him while she bids him question his soul for her.” -JR Miller
Part 2: A Wife’s Part: Part 2–What is the True Ideal?
Part 3: A Wife’s Part: Part 3–What is a Faithful Wife?
Part 4: A Wife’s Part: Part 4-The Good Wife is a Good Housekeeper
12 comments
May we all aspire to such a beautiful standard. I want to bless my husband and be the helpmeet he needs. I know my heart and I cannot, in my own strength, do it. But, praise be to God, He can do it through me!
sounds like a very good book 🙂
That IS poetic!
That’s exactly how I feel about the book! I love it, but I can only read a little bit at a time b/c I need to take it all in. So much meat in so few words. Excellent book!
beautiful! words like these are definitely inspiring. they call us to a standard higher than the world’s, and even our own – they call us to His standard!
This IS a great quote, and one that our culture of domineering women would do well to hear over and over.
And I just thanked my husband today for treating me like a queen. Being a wife is not always easy but it is an honor.
JR Miller’s work – this book in particular – is heart-warming and inspiring. For those interested in reading an abridged version of this 1882 classic, formerly titled “Home Making,” it can be found online here: http://opensourcegospel.blogspot.com/p/marriage-and-family.html
After having read this, I have no doubt many of you will buy the hard copy Kelly has linked.
this passage and questions should be in every premarital counseling.
Really excellent points!
“and though convicted by my own shortcomings, I am yet spurred to recognize this honor and power I have as a wife ”
I love your thoughts here. I feel the same way as I study the Proverbs 31 women. We can be defeated by her “perfection,” or we can dive into our job of perfecting ourselves after Christ and realize that God has giving us a great example to LEAD us, not defeat us. Thanks for sharing.
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