Home Uncategorized I Am Not a Stay at Home Mom

I Am Not a Stay at Home Mom

by Kelly Crawford

Ann Voskamp has awed me yet again…using my favorite words, “you become what you think”, which has monumental significance for understanding our role in life, especially as moms.

Do yourself a favor and read it…don’t forget to let me know your thoughts, though!

“How does an engaged, vibrant, passionate woman forever vanquish the nagging, satanic lies that she is nothing more than a stay at home Mom?

Get Perspective: Hold a sleeping babe in your arms, mouth agape and warm breath drifting, and stand before a map of this world. Which would you rather have? Paris, New York, Tokyo, London——or this flesh lying against yours, this one made in the image and likeness of the very Divine? This world is going to burn up, cinders for the universe….but your child is a soul without end, forever and ever existence. The world has pitifully, laughably little to offer in comparison to this holy opportunity to raise up a child.”

Read Ann Voskamp’s A Strange Disappearance

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Terry @ Breathing Grace November 10, 2008 - 12:29 pm

Powerful! What more could I say? It wouldn’t do the post justice.

authenticallyme November 10, 2008 - 1:10 pm

i LOVE being a stay at home mom. Luckily, I have never struggled too much with feeling less ‘accomplished’ due to choosing to not work outside the home. I really cherish and feel blessed to have the opportunity. I dont look at the issue as black and white as most here might, but at the same time, count each day AWESOME that i can be home with and for my kids….

Leslie November 10, 2008 - 3:58 pm

Wow………tears came to my eyes. May I raise my daughter to be a “future Soul Sculptor for the King of the Universe.”

I passed this on to 3 young moms today. Thank you Kelly.

How are you feeling after your cold/flu bug?

Mrs. Lady Sofia November 10, 2008 - 4:09 pm

I like the perspective of Ann’s article, “A Strange Disappearance” regarding mothers who raise their children full-time (including home schooling) without having a worldly career. I have actually never thought of mothering in the sense of working for The King (e.g., God). I think it’s a very inspiring article to help mothers with young children continue their work without being tempted into “career land,” but to go where God has called them.

This article also gives something for this childless woman (me) ( who is still trying to undue all the damage I learned through feminist view points) to think about regarding motherhood and children.

Melanie November 10, 2008 - 4:11 pm

I just recently found Ann’s blog through yours. Her writings leave me in awe. This one just sent chills all over and left me in tears.

Katherine November 10, 2008 - 4:57 pm

I had the priveledge of voting for GC over at the Homeschool Blog Awards today! Best of Luck!

Word Warrior November 10, 2008 - 5:18 pm


Thank you! I didn’t even know I had been nominated!

Katherine November 10, 2008 - 8:20 pm

You need to write a post about it with a link to it. I know there are a lot of your faithful readers who would love to put a vote in for you, you know, ’cause your so awesome, and all….

Civilla November 10, 2008 - 9:05 pm

That was one awesome post. I have been a stay-at-home wife for about 30 years, even before I had children. People have thought that I was lazy or maybe a nut case. The worst was having people feel sorry for me. I hated the, “What do you do all day?” I would say, “The stuff I didn’t have time to do when I worked.” (When I was a young wife, I worked, and then I felt convicted a couple of years after I was saved, and decided to stay home.) Anyway, an awesome post.

Shannan November 10, 2008 - 10:30 pm

i wish i could be so excited about kids… my hubby and i recently had what i’d acall a pregnancy ‘scare,’ and he (the hubby) made it clear that he would prefer i had an abortion, as we are not ‘ready’ for kids yet. i admit, it would be nice to be able to embrace the idea of just having a baby. luckily, i wasn’t pregnant, just a wayward cyst. but if i had been, i shudder to think what might have been. i’m just not the mom type i guess.

SuzeQ November 11, 2008 - 8:32 am

Amazing! I think I will post it on my wall.
Lord Bless!

Mother of Dog November 11, 2008 - 1:17 pm

You know, if women had NEVER decided to have careers, there would be no discoveries or contributions by:

Marie Currie
Amelia Earhart
Maya Lin
Sally Ride
Florence Nightingale

The list goes on and on. Not everyone is called to be a wife and mother exclusively. As a feminist, I support ALL choices – to work or to stay home. 🙂 Both are important and a personal decision, in my opinion.

Terry @ Breathing Grace November 11, 2008 - 2:16 pm

~Amelia Earhart- No children
~Sally Ride- Single, No children
~Florence Nightingale- Single, No Children (felt called of God to be a nurse)
~Marie Curie- Worked WITH her husband
~Maya Lin- Artist (can be done from just about anywhere.)

For the record, based on my reading of 1 Corinthians 7, it IS a perfectly valid life calling for a woman NOT to marry and have children. Feel free to correct me if I’m wrong. However, I believe that Scripture is clear in this regard: if we are called to wife and motherhood, home is to be our first priority. Period. And a woman can impact the world by raising up children who make a mark on the world that cannot be erased, or by supporting her husband. And if we are so blessed, a la Ruth Bell Graham, for instance, maybe we might even get to do something ourselves after our children are grown- write books, minister to women on a large scale, etc. My point is that we MUST NOT believe the lies that we can do it all at once and do any of it well. Our children are falling away because we are so busy allowing our lives to be driven by our own purposes or looking for our best life now. We have to set biblical priorities and leave our legacies to be written by the Lord.

Mother of Dog November 11, 2008 - 2:38 pm

Well, I don’t know. I guess I respectfully disagree. My friend was raised by a mother who was a state Congresswoman. She’s still very close to her, and claims she was the best mother ever. She’s a great success in the world herself – has published books in addition to raising children. I don’t think her children suffer because she teaches creative writing at the college level. Her husband fully supports her career. As to other great women who were great mothers, here are a couple:

Opera singer Beverly Sills – mother of two special needs children

Madeline Albright

So – nothing is across the board, in my opinion. Some men are more nurturing than women. To each her own. 🙂

I will say that I disagree with any feminists who make women feel badly about staying home with their children. The choice is theirs.

Word Warrior November 11, 2008 - 2:53 pm


A point you are missing, and may possibly be foreign to you if you’re not a Christian, is that we don’t measure what we can or can’t do by what is possible, or what “I” want to do.

We hold God’s Word as standard, and believe women were created to be helpers to their husbands–as a family, we each have a perfect role, already ordained by God.

The irony being, that those women who do embrace such mandates from Scripture, not purposely setting out to change the world, experience freedom, joy and usually opportunities to “impact the world” much larger than a woman following her own path.

Through obedience to God her freedom and mammoth-sized impact is found.

Mother of Dog November 11, 2008 - 2:57 pm

I do realize that, and no I’m not a Christian. I absolutely respect your views. I’m simply sharing mine. 🙂

Anonymous November 12, 2008 - 9:41 am

Dear Mother of Dog,
Thank you so much for your respect to others while disagreeing!!! So kind ,the value of others even if on different pages. I just wanted to let you know that I appritiate that about you. tammy

Elizabeth November 19, 2008 - 10:02 am

It was an inspiring article. I do believe that there is great power and contentment in doing whatever we do as for the Lord. It does change one’s perspective.


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