Home working moms Homemaker vs.Career—Sin or Suggestion?

Homemaker vs.Career—Sin or Suggestion?

by Kelly Crawford

Rebekah asked a very good and probing question…do the passages in I Tim. 5:14 and Titus 2 teach us that working outside the home is a sin? I wanted to get your opinions before I answered. PLEASE read these passages before you reply…and make your reply in reference to the verses.

“I have a question….

You said in a comment you left someone, that you don’t believe that the Scriptures say it’s a sin to not be a homemaker. Reading this left me with some concern, and with a question that I hope you will answer when you find the time.

Before I ask the question, I would like to point out some things from the 2 above mentioned passages (I Timothy 5:14, Titus 2:2-4). These passages teach that if these women are not homemakers, then the Word of God will be blasphemed. As Christians, it is clearly a sin to do anything that would cause God or His Word to be blasphemed, reviled, put down, etc. Therefore, this passage is teaching clearly that it is a sin to not be a homemaker. Secondly, in these passages, women are admonished or commanded to be homemakers. They are not given this possibility, or told that this would be the wisest plan for them. Rather, they are commanded. If we disobey the Lord’s commands, then we are in sin.

We have to keep our hermenuetic(method of interpreting Scripture) the same, no matter what passage we come to. I think it’s pretty clear in these passages that not being a homemaker is a sin(because it’s directly disobeying a command, and not being a homemaker would bring dishonor to God’s Word, His name, etc.).

Therefore, my question is this: how can you rectify what you said about not thinking the Scriptures say that it’s a sin to work outside the home, with the fact of what the above passages are teaching?”

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41 comments

Brenda May 6, 2008 - 12:25 pm

OK, I’m gonna go re-read these passages before I comment. Looking forward to this!

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Terry @ Breathing Grace May 6, 2008 - 1:42 pm

I have read and re-read these pasages as I have been challenged on my own blog about my belief that WIVES are to be keepers at home first and foremost. Still I went back and read them again. My answer is still the same: It is not necessarily a sin for a woman to work outside the home. I don’t think it’s the best thing, but I will not go so far as to call it a sin.

First off, in both passages, there is the mention of a husband. And as sad as it is, because of our backwards culture and lax church teachings, the reality is that many women will go through a large portion of their lives unmarried. Some will never marry at all. It’s simply the sad truth.

Second, which is the greater command: keep the home, or submit to the husband? I say that it’s submit to the husband. And there are many husbands (Christian and non alike) who believe the best way that their wives can be a helper suitable for them is to help relieve some of the financial burden, i.e., WORK! And many men are willing to eat takeout a few nights a week and do a load of laundry in exchange for the extra money. Now we can admonish women to make better choices when choosing a husband and all of that but many people don’t come to a saving knowledge of Christ until their adult years when they are already married and entrenched in the two income lifestyle, with all the debt and financial bondage that entails. Does God’s grace not apply to them in this situation?

I think your recent post, Kelly, that addressed the way we think about things is key. It was wonderfully written and full of compassion as well as truth, just like the heart of God. Our heart motivations do matter. I believe with all my heart that women (and wives in particular) are to be homemakers. I believe that when the husband provides and the wife manages the home there is a beautiful and godly picture of interdependency and is the ultimate example for a Christian family. But in a fallen world where the grace of God is in abundance for those who seek it, I refuse to with hold it from people in various situations because I believe that God measures our hearts first.

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Tamsin May 6, 2008 - 2:03 pm

This was great – it made me go back to all the verses I thought I knew well & examine them thoroughly!

I think (still young, so I don’t see my opinions as especially wise or trustworthy yet) that I agree with Terry: wives should look first to their homes. After that, I can’t find any specific prohibitation – and of course, Mrs. Proverbs31 had several profitable lines of work.

I look forward to the discussion on this!

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Miss Rebekah Ann S. May 6, 2008 - 2:23 pm

Thank you for this post, Mrs. Crawford. I look forward to hearing what you have to say.

Terry,

You’re right. It is referring to wives. However, we can’t necessarily go so far as to say that she’s only required or commanded to be a homemaker as long as there’s a husband in the picture(i.e. she’s not divorced, etc.). Because, if we said that, then we would have to use that hermeneutic with all parts of Titus 2:5, and say that she only has to love her husband if she has children, and she only needs to be good if she’s a homemaker, and she only needs to be discreet and chaste if she has a husband and children, etc. And of course, that kind of method of interpreting Scripture would get us into all kinds of trouble, and is of course very wrong! Some things that are really interesting that I would like to point out are the following: single daughters are to remain under the roof,provision and protection of their father until they are given in marriage(I’m currently writing a really long 4 part article series on this very subject), married women are to be homemakers, young widows are to marry and keep the house, and according to 1 Timothy 5, older widows are to be cared for as well(by their family members or the church) , since they don’t have the provision of their husbands anymore. It appears to me that the Lord is trying to tell us something: ladies, remain at home-not out in the workforce! I find it really interesting that the Scriptures show that at every point in a Christian woman’s life, she is to be provided for to where she will have no need to go into the workforce. It appears to me that the Lord is trying to keep these ladies out of the workforce at all costs! Also, Proverbs 7:11 says, “She was loud and rebellious, her feet would not stay at home.” Now, obviously this passage is referring to the crafty harlot, and I’m obviously by NO MEANS saying or trying to imply that women who work outside the home are all harlots. That would be absurd. But I do find this verse very interesting as well. I think it sort of links to Titus 2:5, because in that passage, women are commanded to be discreet homemakers. But this Proverbs passage says that this woman was loud(not discreet!) and rebellious and that her feet would simply not stay at home. This verse shows those characteristics to be bad things. Now, obviously, I don’t take this passage to the extreme that some attempt to, by trying to imply that a woman must never set foot outside her home. That’s a perpostrous idea! But, I do think this verse is very noteworthy and thought-provoking.

Of course, God’s grace applies to them in that situation that you described. But that doesn’t mean that that woman shouldn’t be doing everything in her power to come home. I understand that there are families where 2 incomes are needed(or at least, thought to be needed-there are many times when families obey the Lord with the husband only going out to work, and the Lord richly, richly blesses them, despite the low income). In those cases, a woman needs to look into having a home business. The Prov. 31 woman did just that, and that extra money on the side really blessed that family and allowed her to, in turn, bless the poor and needy. There’s absolutely no reason for us to think that if a family needs a little extra $, that that wife has to automatically run out into the workforce. In fact, the woman who runs out into the workforce rather than conducting a home business, in the long run will probably be making less money, for you have to take into account day care expenses, transportation, wardrobe for the job, etc. etc.-expenses that a home business operator would not have. I do agree that submitting to your husband is of huge importance. But here’s something else that’s interesting: they are linked together in this Titus 2 passage! It appears that one does not have precedence over the other(at least in this passage)-they’re both hugely important, and if either area is not obeyed, blaspheming of God’s Word will result. There’s something else that we have to take into account and that is this:We are to obey God rather than man(Acts 5:29). Of course, at the same time, 1 Peter 3 commands women to submit to their husbands-even if those husbands to not obey the Word. In this situation, I would say that the Christian woman must pray like she’s never prayed before! 🙂 With God ALL things are possible, and so it’s very likely that her prayers would cause that man’s beliefs and desires to turn around.

I agree with what you said, Terry, in your last paragraph. Women in those situations who feel like they’re stuck in the workforce need to be ministered to, loved, and prayed for! We need to help them out in some way, so that they can come back home.

I just really have a hard time when people say that they fully believe that women are to be homemakers, but then they say that it’s not necessarily a sin to not be one. In both of these passages that were mentioned, I find it interesting that the Lord caused His Word to be written in such a way that in both instances, the command to be a homemaker is there followed by: so that the Word of God be not blasphemed, or so that the adversary will not speak reproachfully. I think the Lord’s trying to tell us something. It’s disobedience to not follow and live out our Lord’s commands, and when we disobey this specific command, His Word will be blasphemed. For a Christian to cause God’s Word to be blasphemed is a huge offense!

Terry, I hope that in responding to your comment, I didn’t come across as arguementative or disrespectful to you. Obviously, you are older than I am, and so I have the responsibility of being respectful to the utmost. If I came across sounding disrespectful, please accept my apology in advance!

Have a blessed day.

In Christ,
Rebekah Ann

http://www.byhisgraceandforhisglory.blogspot.com

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Miss Rebekah Ann S. May 6, 2008 - 2:24 pm

Tamsin,

You’re exactly right! This woman had numerous home businesses. It’s amazing that she found the time to do all that she did! 🙂

Blessings,
Rebekah

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Miss Rebekah Ann S. May 6, 2008 - 2:29 pm

Many women (both Christian and non-Christian) say things such as, “As long as her home doesn’t fall by the wayside, then she is free to work outside the home”, or “Her first priority should be her home, but she can work outside of it as well”. First of all if you work outside the home, your home/family may very well fall by the wayside, for there’s just not time in the day to do all of those things! Something would fall by the wayside-either the outside job, her family, the cleanliness of her home, her health, her ministry, etc. etc. Secondly, if all the Scriptures said on this subject was that a woman’s home must be taken care of and should be her first priority, then I would say: “You know what? Do whatever you want. If you want to work outside the home, go right ahead, just make sure that you focus on your home a lot as well”. But that’s not what the Scriptures leave us with! They specifically command a Christian woman to be a keeper at home(or worker at home, or a manager of the home, or homemaker, depending on the version of the Bible you’re reading :)).

In Him,
Rebekah

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Terry @ Breathing Grace May 6, 2008 - 2:52 pm

So Rebekah, my question is this, if a woman is submitting to her husband by working, is she in sin? Particularly in light of the 1 Peter verse that admonishes wives to obey even their unbelieving husbands? In addition, what of women whose fathers have abandoned them or were raised in single parent homes?

I am not disagreeing with you, believe it or not. It’s just that I am intimately acquainted with women in every situation I just described and more. They love the Lord and wish with all their hearts they had the ideal situation (a loving father, a husband willing and/or able to provide, a church that would extend itself to help). But what if that’s not a reality for them at this stage of their lives?

It’s true that the word indeed has provisions in place for a woman at every stage of her life. But all of those provisions assume that the necessary supports are in place for the need to be met.

My question for you is this: can you see where we would have to allow for the grace of God in instances where the ideal is not possible? And would our God really punish a young woman raised in the foster care system who suddenly finds herself on her own at 18? Or the woman who comes to know him at age 38 and has no knowledge of the verses we are speaking about?

I know that there are plenty of families on the two income track who know the Lord and know better. They could choose to obey this directive and don’t, for materialistic reasons. In those cases, you are absolutely right! I’m simply pointing out that there are cases where people are doing their best, from the integrity of their hearts, and we MUST extend the grace of God in those cases, because I believe He does. We must beware of religious dogmatism, and know that we are all in the process of becoming more like Christ. We are in different stages of the journey and some people start off from places we can’t even begin to imagine.

The greatest commandment is “love the Lord with all your heart and your neighbor as yourself”, not “thou shalt be a homemaker.”

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Terry @ Breathing Grace May 6, 2008 - 3:08 pm

Oh by the way, Rebekah, I totally agree ith you that its best for a woman to find ways to generate income frome within the home. If she MUST earn money, I feel that this is the most Biblical way. I am simply addressing the truth that many women come to Christ from a myriad of backgrounds and situations, and they won’t be able to jump into the role of homekeeper overnight. But they are no less heavenbound!

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Mrs W May 6, 2008 - 3:10 pm

Women staying at home is God’s perfect plan for women. However, due to sin, not everything functions the way God purposed it originally. We can still strive to do it the way God wanted it, but I believe it is more important for a woman to submit to her husband than refuse even in this area.

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Word Warrior May 6, 2008 - 3:36 pm

I would only agree that “it’s more important to submit to your husband than to be a keeper” if we established that it is not an issue of sin–the very question we’re addressing.

In issues of sin, I believe a woman is to defer to her obedience to God before her husband’s. (For example, if he asked her to commit an immoral act, she would be free to disobey her husband in order to obey God’s explicit command against immorality.)

The question remains, then, “is being a keeper at home an explicit command, or a suggestion”?

Another question…does the fact that we are “fallen” negate commands from Scripture?

What about the command “do not look upon a woman to lust after her”?

Is a man freed from this command by contending that because our culture is so fallen and full of pornography it is impossible for him to obey it?

I think Rebekah is right that we have to have our hermenuetics straight! I’m still thinking…

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Lindsay S. May 6, 2008 - 3:48 pm

This is a great post and I am learning a whole lot!

My response/question to Terry is this:

You are correct that we are all in different stages of our life and, prayerfully, all growing daily in our walks with Christ. I also know that we live in reality, a culture that has no true concept of God. But…if the 18 year old and the 38 year old were presented with God’s Truth of women being keepers at home, would they earnestly pray and ask the Lord to provide for them and trust Him to do so? Or, would they deem their circumstances as “impossible” and go out and find a job when things began to be beyond their control?

Remember the widow and the oil in II Kings 4:1-7. Talk about life being beyond her control! But…God provided! Not only to pay off her debt to the tax collectors and keep her 2 sons from becoming slaves, but God provided enough for her and her 2 sons to live off of!!

I completely agree with Rebekah. We MUST, as Christians, take God at His Word and trust Him to provide. “The effectual, fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much”.

We must allow God to “show Himself strong on behalf of those whose hearts are loyal to Him.” II Chron. 16:9a

If we “faint in the day of adversity our strength is small.” Prov. 24:10

“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1

Do we, as Christian women, have “the faith to trust what we cannot see?” If we don’t have faith the He will provide, we cannot be pleasing to Him.

“For without faith, it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of them who diligently seek Him.” Hebrews 11:6

We MUST trust in the Lord God who will provide.

Lindsay S.

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Terry @ Breathing Grace May 6, 2008 - 3:55 pm

As I read the last comment my mind went to Matthew chapter 12 when Jesus’ disciples began to pluck the heads of grain on the Sabbath and the pharisees condemned them. Jesus reminded them of David and his hungry soldiers eating the show bread in the temple even though it was not lawful for them to eat it.

And I think about Deborah leading the Israelites into battle with Barak. Women didn’t then and don’t now belong in battle but God give Israel the victory.

And I think about Jesus pardoning the woman caught in adultery even though the law said she should be stoned.

There are numerous instances in the Bible where God extends grace to us in our fallen states and honors the integrity of our hearts toward Him.

Is this an excuse for sin? Heaven forbid! We are to do all we can to walk upright before God and obey His commands. But we must, like our God, extend grace and be slow to condemn one of His children when they operate in the integrity of their hearts before Him and are making every effort to obey, even if circumstances mean they sometimes fall short.

Okay, Kelly, I’m done. You won’t hear from me anymore today! 😉

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Word Warrior May 6, 2008 - 4:17 pm

John McArthur, who doesn’t explicity say that working outside the home is a sin, does have this to say:

“A woman who is a mother obviously has primary responsibility in the home and would therefore not be free to pursue outside employment to the detriment of the home. In fact, from a parental perspective it is difficult to see how a mother could possibly do all that needs to be done in the home with the upbringing of children, hospitality, care of the needy, and work for the Lord (cf. 1 Timothy 5:3-14) and still work in an outside job. Indeed, any wife who fulfills God’s priorities in her life and home will be a busy lady. However, her children and her husband will rise up and call her blessed, and a woman who fears the LORD shall be praised.” (Proverbs 31:28,30).

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Word Warrior May 6, 2008 - 4:27 pm

I think several of you are right…here’s my personal view:

I do believe in literal interpretation of Scripture, and when Titus 2 says to “teach the women to be keepers at home (among other things) so that the WORD OF GOD IS NOT BLASHPHEMED” we had better sit up and take notice.

I think we should be teaching young women just that…and it is a HARD lesson for some ears to hear.

By the same token, as Terry pointed out, there are times and places (maybe a woman came to embrace this teaching in the middle of a financial crisis) where it is not possible, AT THE MOMENT for her to come home.

If that is the case, though, it should be viewed as a negative situation that should be as temporary as possible.

It’s like I posted about a few days ago…if we are bringing up girls saying to them, “honey you just do whatever your heart desires”, then we are giving them false teaching. We should be rejoicing with them that the Lord has already given them a WEALTH of things to do from the home…a whole world to which they can minister.

By the way, part of this teaching includes undoing the deception caused by the feminist agenda that says homemaking is nothing but “being at home”, and revealing the tremendous opportunities and obligations that lie within a keeper’s domain.

But if we find a sister “caught”, we should be gentle with her, giving her truth, and holding her hand at the same time.

Does that make sense?

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Lindsay S. May 6, 2008 - 5:18 pm

Terry,

I agree with you completely that we should be slow to condemn and extend grace to all people. We all fall short, myself most definitely included! 🙂
And, just as you said, everything we do is an issue of the heart.

But I think you miss my point. When women are confronted with God’s truth, of women being keepers at home, how do they respond?

I too, like Kelly, enjoy John MacArthur. He makes the point, about David and his soldiers eating the showbread, that the Pharisees were making “extra laws” that were not of God. According to MacArthur, it was not unlawful to pluck grain on the Sabbath. It was unlawful to work on the Sabbath for the sake of profit. The Pharissee’s missed this point.

Deborah was used to humiliate the men of Israel because of their disobedience to God’s orders, especially Barak’s disobedience. She was used as an example of the cowardice of the men. I hope to never be in that position.

The woman caught in adultery was definitely extended grace, but she was also told to “Go and sin no more”

So…when we are confronted with God’s Truth, do we continue in our ways or trust in His will to provide? If a woman is working outside the home and has never heard that women should be keepers at home, will she make every effort and trust the Lord to provide for her and her family once she has been told Truth?

As much I love having a roof over my head, all that the Lord has promised us is food and clothing. Most women go to work for extra money in the first place. How much do we really need? ( I am especially talking to myself here!) 🙂

It all goes back to what Kelly was saying in the first place: it’s all about how you think. But our thinking should be based on Scripture.

I am NOT saying it is easy! But I am saying it is Biblical Truth.

Lindsay S.

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Brenda May 6, 2008 - 5:26 pm

I think there are 2 kinds of Christians, or women: Those who understand God’s purpose for wives, and those who don’t (yet). I have found myself in several situations.
1. I have been a Christian woman who worked outside of the home and didn’t know any better. That is very sad to say, but it’s true. I know the verses are right there in scripture, and I grew up in church, but I could not have told you what God had to say about wives or women.
2. I have been a Christian woman who worked outside of the home and understood God’s plan for me. It was at that point that I could not continue to work outside the home!I wanted what God wanted!!! I wanted to obey. Was I stuck? Oh, absolutely! So I began to pray and trust God.
3. Now I am a Christian woman who keeps the home. (God delivered me!) I am not looking my nose down at other Christian women who work, I am just heart-broken that they don’t know. How can we get this message out? I am beginning by teaching my daughters…and writing on my blog. The church needs to teach this and we need to live it in front of others.

God’s way works. Due to sin, and this fallen world…many Christian women…when they DO come to this realization…are going to find themselves unable to obey immediately. But our hearts should turn and desire what God desires. The main sin I see is women who understand these scriptures and refuse to believe they apply to their life. That is called rebellion…and I know that to be sin.

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God's Dancing Child May 6, 2008 - 5:58 pm

I am going to have to continue my “When he walks away” series. This has been a great motivator for it! I have a response to the thread here that is actually what I was wanting to get to next in my series.
This has produced a lot of great conversation!
Will have my post up by the end of the day.

Also, Lindsay, your last post brought tears to my eyes. We lived through homelessness with a trust that He would provide for us, and He always did, does and will continue to. Thank you for pointing to that truth!

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lindsay s. May 6, 2008 - 6:00 pm

well said Brenda!

God’s ways always work! We should not look down our noses at others for what they do. But we should love them and pray God opens their eyes to His Truth.

God delivered me as well from working outside the home! He alone, gave me eyes to see and I am so grateful.

And thank you, Kelly, for this blog. It is daily encouragement and a blessing to me.

Lindsay S.

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Word Warrior May 6, 2008 - 6:25 pm

You ladies are incredible! I just love this…thought-provoking, kind, probing debate. The kind that sharpens the mind, questions the heart, and hones the tongue.

We NEED this…we need reminding, pushing to revisit the heart of God…Satan is cunning and would sway even the boldest of women.

Hear this from Daniel 6:

“…Daniel distinguished himself above the governors and satraps, because an excellent spirit was in him;…

Now when Daniel knew that the writing was signed (that no one could pray to any god but the king), he went home. And in his upper room, with his windows open, he knelt down on his knees three times that day, and prayed and gave thanks before his God, as was his custom since early days.”

Daniel was a man of unwavering faith and obedience. In the face of even death, not once, but MANY times, he rejected the “sensible” thing, and obeyed God anyway. Gotta love it!

And I believe we CAN turn a tide of wrong thinking, and restore the family back to God’s original design–through being and teaching joyful, happy women who delight in reigning as queens of their homes.

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Jasmine May 6, 2008 - 8:23 pm

As a “single,” eighteen-year-old young woman living under the protection of her parents and walking in the grace of my Savior, I am training -even now -to become a full-time keeper at home, because I believe that is God’s perfect plan, laid forth very clearly in Scripture -a woman’s primary sphere of influence should be her home.

But, as a very young woman, I know that I am privileged to live the lifestyle that I lead, and I am so grateful for God’s abundant blessing in a family who has walked me down this path! I realize that there are young woman who desperately desire the life that I lead, and do not -at THIS TIME -have the privilege of leading it.

Not every young woman has the privilege of her father’s protection -not every married woman has the privilege of a husband with the means and desire for her to stay at home. The last thing I want to do is judge these women because of where God deemed fit to place them at this time in their lives, because He will use whatever circumstance they’re in for His glory!

Our culture -in many ways -is in a “transition” stage, with so many Christian men and women turning their hearts towards God’s Word and seeing His will for family life. If they are earnestly seeking after Him, waiting for His guidance and trusting His provision, I firmly believe they will arrive at Christ-honoring conclusions for their families. For a lot of women in the work force, I think that means that the “working times” in their life will become a transition towards a more biblical view of the home.

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Jasmine May 6, 2008 - 8:24 pm

All that to say…

I’m really enjoying this discussion. 🙂 I feel a little in adequate adding my very inexperienced two cents. 🙂

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Mrs W May 7, 2008 - 8:41 am

I believe that it is a “command” for a woman to be a keeper at home, the Bible specifically states so. But I don’t think that we should be judgmental of the women who can’t/don’t stay at home because of their circumstances. I must admit that I don’t have a lot of respect for women that choose to work even though their husbands don’t make them, but I am still friends with them etc.

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Miss Rebekah Ann S. May 7, 2008 - 3:20 pm

Wow, this question of mine has generated a lot of input! 🙂

Terry,

Hi! 🙂 Thank you for your input. Yes, I FULLY and wholeheartedly agree that we MUST extend grace and love to women who find themselves in the situations you mentioned. That is so important. If we are obeying the Lord in this area, and we come across people who aren’t, and we treat them with judgment and contempt, we’re not being Biblical-we’re being self-righteous. At the same time, though, it is our responsibility according to Matthew 7 and other passages, to (in love) point out where they’re in the wrong, in order to bring them closer to Christ and nearer to His blessings that are given to those who obey. We are not to do so to be prideful, self-righteous, or self-pleasing, but in order to bring them closer in their walk with Christ. As you said, unfortunately there are many Christian women who have no idea that a Titus 2:5 or 1 Timothy 5:14 even exist! I know I certainly didn’t until last year! I’m ashamed to say that, but it’s true. I was completely ignorant of the fact that that command is explicitly given. So,(even though Christian women have the responsibility to study and know God’s Word well!) we cannot and must not look down our noses at some Christian woman who don’t know that these passages exist, and so are therefore obviously disobeying them. It is our job to edify them, and then to help them get out of the workforce if they feel they are financially stuck there. If we Christians who know this command exists and yet don’t seek to help the working Christian women we know get out of the workforce, then we are aiding them in their sin, and that’s a huge offense against God! We need to do whatever we can-pray for them, financially help them, help them get on a budget, help them to start a home business, help them to trust and rely on God more, etc., to get them out of the workforce-a place where they are not supposed to be, according to these passages of Scripture.

This is one area in which our churches are HUGELY falling short. They will be held accountable to Almighty God for not supporting widows and other Christian women in need, who find themselves “stuck” in the workforce. Churches need to begin to wake up and realize that they are COMMANDED by God to help those in need-especially when it’s an issue of obedience vs. disobedience.

You’re right that what the passages(where provisions for women at every stage are laid out) assume is that the necessary needs are met- that a Godly father, income-making husband, helping church, etc. are in place. But this doesn’t mean that these women are necessarily let off the hook. Because, as Lindsay S. pointed out, we have to trust in and rely on God! If I was a divorced mom, for me to basically say to God, “I’m in a hard situation. I need to go out and work.”, would be a slap in His face. It would be like saying to Him, “I know better than You do; You can’t really provide for me in this instance, I have to take care of and provide for myself, because this is just too big and too hard of a situation.” This is a huge sin, because to basically slap God in the face by saying that only we can truly take care of ourselves, is extremely unhonoring to Him. We humans(including myself-I’m horrible at this!!!) need to learn how to trust God! For us to take matters into our own hands, and not wait for God to work, and not trust and have strong faith in Him, is horrible. We, for our little faith, will be admonished by Him just as His disciples were in the boat during the storm. And it’s also a horrible witness to the world, because it basically says, “God isn’t big enough or powerful enough to take care of me”. He WILL provide for His children, and will richly bless them when they obey Him unwaveringly, no matter what situation they find themselves in. Even though these women are in these situations, does not mean that they are not in sin, by not being a homemaker. We can’t allow our situations to dictate what sin is-God’s Word alone is able to do that. Take for instance, this analogy: pretend that there is a homeless woman with a young toddler. Let’s say that this woman is completely on her own-no financial help from any family member, friend, or church. Let’s say that her child is in desperate need of food-that without food very quickly, the child will die. Now, because of this situation, let’s say that that woman steals a box of cereal from the grocery store, so that she can provide food for her child. Does her reason for sinning make the sin right? Of course not. She sinned in 2 ways-by stealing(which of course, in a sin against 1 of the 10 commandments) and by not trusting God to meet her needs(perhaps through some miraculous means). We can all sympathize with this mother and understand fully why she did what she did, but that doesn’t make it right-she still would have been in sin. In this instance, we would need to support her and help her in any way we can, to keep her from those sins in the future!

Sadly, you’re exactly right-there are many Christian woman who feel trapped in the workforce, and feel horrible about it. That’s where we come in! 🙂 We need to step in and help in any way possible.

I best be going now…hope to hear from you soon!

Have a blessed day, Terry!

In Christ alone,
Rebekah

P.S. Thank you so much for the comment you left on my blog! It was such a joy to hear from you; I hope you continue to visit my blog and comment! 🙂 Oh, and I looked at your blog for a few minutes yesterday, and discovered that you’re expecting! 🙂 How wonderful!! Praise God for that little blessing.

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Miss Rebekah Ann S. May 7, 2008 - 5:13 pm

Terry, you said: “I am simply addressing the truth that many women come to Christ from a myriad of backgrounds and situations, and they won’t be able to jump into the role of homekeeper overnight. But they are no less heavenbound!”

I couldn’t agree more! That’s so true. By saying that the Scriptures teach that not being a homemaker is disobedience, and is therefore a sin, I’m by no means trying to say that I expect every working Christian woman to immediately quit her job and return home today. That wouldn’t be possible. There are changes and transitions that must be made. But these transitions and preperations must be made asap!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mrs. Crawford,

I think it’s evidantly clear(especially in the wording of Titus 2:4-5) that a woman being a homemaker is by no means simply a suggestion.

To answer your other question, obviously the fact that we live in a fallen world in no way negates the commands of Scripture, or makes them void! It would of course be absurd for any of us to try to say that.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lindsay S.,

Thank you so much for your comment and for those passages you shared with us. I wholeheartedly agree with you. The Lord is not going to issue forth to us a direct and explicit command(i.e. be a homemaker) and then work events out according to His sovereign will to where we are in a very financially low situation that would force us to go out into the workforce! He’s not going to give us a command and then put us in a situation that would force us to disobey it. He may put us into that situation to test our faith, trust and obedience. But He WILL provide for us in that situation. He won’t put us in that situation and then(because we obeyed Him, rather than rushing off to the workforce) not provide for us and just leave us hanging. He would richly bless us for our obedience, faith and trust.

Have a blessed day!
Rebekah Ann
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mrs. Crawford and Lindsay S.,

We, too, really enjoy John MacArthur’s teaching!

Lindsay,
I agree with your second comment as well. That’s what I was trying to basically say in my comments. 🙂 I hope it came across the way I wanted.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I agree with you, Jasmine(Jaybird)! 🙂 I, too am SO very, very thankful to and humbled before the Lord for placing me in a family that loves His truth regarding men’s and woman’s roles. I don’t deserve this wonderful upbringing, but the Lord lovingly and sovereignly chose to place me here anyway. Praise His holy name!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mrs. Gunning,
I look forward to reading your post!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Brenda,

You are so right! We desperately need to get this message out. Sadly, so many Christian women are not getting this message from their friends, family, or churches. It’s a message that MUST be taught, heard and heeded. Here are some ways to spread this message:

1. Have a blog and/or website, like you said. That’s a great way to get this much needed message out.

2. Write a book(or an e-book or booklet, if a full-length book is a little daunting at first.) on this topic.

3. Befriend the women(Christian and non) in your neighborhood and begin a Bible study with them, your current friends, and any family members that are near you. Study the passages of Scripture that are geared towards women. Having a Bible study and opening your home to Christian women that are in the workforce is a GREAT way to get this message out, and to be encouraging at the same time.

4. Begin a women’s Bible study that would be open to the women in your church, and teach the above mentioned passages.

5. Pray for the Christian women you know who are in the workforce that they:

a) if they don’t know the truth in this area, that the Lord would reveal it to them

b) that they would have a heart for home

c) that they would find ways to get out of the workforce quickly

These are just some practical ideas I came up with; I hope they were helpful. I’m sure there are many more great ideas out there! We should all pray that the Lord would reveal those ideas to us!

Have a blessed day,
Rebekah Ann

http://www.byhisgraceandforhisglory.blogspot.com

Reply
molly May 8, 2008 - 12:25 am

Whoops. I put this post in the wrong thread. Here it is again:

“that the word of God be not blasphemed.”

One possible interpretation for this is that a woman who is not a homekeeper is a blasphemer.

But one OTHER valid possible interpretation for what this is that the culture Paul and the early church lived in believed that a woman’s place was in the home.

A woman out of the home was seen to be a shameful thing to both pagans and Jews during the time of the NT. That isn’t to say that they pagans or Jews were right or wrong in their stance, but rather, that’s just the way they were then.

So Paul’s advice about women managing their homes “lest the word of God be blasphemed” may have had to do with the fact that if Christian women all of a sudden started taking advantange of their new freedom, people were going to get really upset with this new Christian religion (more upset than they already were—and it was already a crime worthy of death as it was!).

Paul gave and LIVED the advice to “be all things to all people.” Paul said that many times in many ways—that the thing to do was to not be offensive but to be gentle and gracious, to not demand your own rights but to respect others—-to not offend, unless one had to be (ie., unless the other person was offended by Christ).

I’m not saying that is the only possible interpretation, but it certainly is a strong possible one. It’s not one that’s grasping for straws but one that fits in perfectly with what was going on when Paul was instructing the church. Jewish and the Roman cultures were so so SO deeply engrained against women being out of the home.

There were rabbi’s then that counseled men to not let their wives be seen out of the house, and if they *must* walk somewhere together, to be sure and walk well ahead of their wife and certainly never to talk to her in public!

So, I’m not sure it’s a wise thing to say that it a woman out of the home *today* is emphatically blaspheming the word of God. It is one possible way of interpreting the passage, sure. But is it the Right Way? I’m not sure about that.

For example, Paul (who wrote Titus) had a woman deliver the gospel of Romans (which was *quite* the adventurous journey, then–and do see Rom.16 for his impressive commendation of this non-homekeeping woman, for whom he uses the greek word for deacon normally used only for men! Woah!). Jesus had women in his band of disciples that followed Him around, some of them married women [Joanna, wife of Herod’s steward], and seemed just fine with it.

Both Jesus and Paul didn’t seem to think that a woman’s place was in the home at all, in other words.

I’m a big fan of letting Scripture help us interpret Scripture (because if your interpretation of Titus 2 is correct, then Jesus and Paul were both out of line).

Warmly,
Molly
(sahm homeschooling mom of five)

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Miss Rebekah Ann S. May 8, 2008 - 9:15 am

Molly,

I responded to this comment in the other thread. But, you said a few extra things in this one that I would like to address, if I may.

You’re exactly right with the way the Jewish culture was back then-they thought women were only things or servants. There was even a prayer that the Jewish men would say every day that went like this: “Thank you God, that I’m not a pig, a Gentile, or a woman.” The men in that culture did like to “chain their wives to the home” so to speak. But the Lord condemns this. Take, for instance, Proverbs 31. At the time when this was first penned, this passage would have been seen as absolutely perpostrous in the eyes of the Jews! How dare there be a passage that shows the ideal woman going to the marketplace, or owning a vinyard, etc. etc. But, you know what? The Jewish culture was obviously wrong, and this passage is exactly the way our Lord desires Christian women to be. And you know what’s evidant in this passage? She’s a homekeeper. She looks well to the ways of her household. She has many home businesses and ministries, but they’re all geared towards the home. It’s true that Jesus was hugely against the unfair treatment of women. But, He didn’t refute it by saying that women were then free to work outside the home. Rather, He leaves us with a picture of the woman we are to live up to, and she’s a homemaker! Not one that’s not allowed to ever set foot outside her home, mind you, but a homemaker none the less.

We must have a literal interpretation of Scripture-reading and applying it exactly the way our Lord wrote it. And it then becomes pretty clear that our Lord desires women to be homemakers. And one of the reasons for this? That the Word of God will not be blasphemed. This is applicable today just as it was when it was first penned. Just one(of the many) ways that the Word of God can be blasphemed by a Christian woman not being a homemaker is the following: the Christian woman who works outside the home has a very limited amount of time with her children. The homemaker has an ample amount of time to disciple her children. But the one who works outside her home doesn’t. Those children could end up growing up, not being saved, and could end up blaspheming God’s Word, because their mother wasn’t even there for them most of the time.

As to women following Christ, for one thing, when these women first started walking after Him, they weren’t Christians! And the command to be a homemaker is only given to Christian women. Secondly, these women(such as Joanna) could have been homemakers before they followed Him. But at that point, what’s more important-acquiring salvation, or keeping the house(something that she wasn’t even commanded to do, because at the time she wouldn’t have been saved)? Of course we would agree on the answer to this.

I also have to respectfully yet strongly disagree with what you said about Paul maybe penning the words about God’s Word being blasphemed, so as to not make others even more upset with the Christian religion. Paul was extremely bold, and had no problem with upsetting others if he had to, in order to witness to or evangelize them. He was not some mousy little man who was afraid to insult anyone. Rather, he was a bold defender of Christianity who preached boldly for Christ no matter what.

I hope you have a blessed day, Molly.

In Christ,
Rebekah

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LadyLydiaSpeaks May 8, 2008 - 10:58 am

I have often thought that we are too busy looking at brush strokes and missing the bigger picture.

One of the basic themes of the New Testament is to be different from the world. Women who follow the scriptural patterns of I Timothy 5:14, Titus 2 and others, are going to be strikingly different than the women of the world who want to be seen and heard.

In contrast, the woman of the home is non-threatening and sweet. The women of the world, just like in any day, at any time, will be exposed to the world, under scrutiny and may even find themselves in submission to people they are not even related to. Women of the church were told to be the opposite. Instead of arguing loudly in a meeting, half the noise is cut out just by the married women only asking questions of their husbands. Instead of being showy and immodest, like the women in public, a woman at home doesn’t have that kind of pressure on her. In my opinion, being different than the world is one of the reasons Christ gave the women special attention and special roles. It was also a protection for them. They would not have to be ruled, protected or provided for by just anyone. Their husbands would be responsible for them.God knows what he is doing when he makes the center of culture the family. If we want peace in our lives, we cannot have rebellion and in the home. The women at home have a great responsibility. I read once that submission was a “sub-mission” meaning both on the same mission, with the wife second in command. That holds a huge responsibility. Amd for those who get all upset because of the scriptures about the husband being the head of the wife: it isn’t hard to obey someone that really loves you. It isn’t hard to feel complete when in submission to such a man. Girls should marry a man they would feel confident obeying.

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Miss Rebekah Ann S. May 8, 2008 - 11:03 am

Mrs. Sherman,

Thank you so much for those words. You presented Biblical truth in such a beautiful way.

May the Lord richly bless you!

Rebekah

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LadyLydiaSpeaks May 8, 2008 - 11:09 am

I left off before I fully explained my feelings on the matter:

Christs plan is for women to be treated in a special way, and to be different from the world. While the world wants women to get out there and compete and fight for a career, Christ already liberates her with His permission for her to be the keeper and guide of the home. You cannot guard and guide the home when you are working for someone else. The Christian woman is complimented by Christ for having a quiet and gentle spirit. The home provides the opportunity for her to develop that inner peace. At work, as most women can attest, there are a lot of things going on that the Christian woman would not allow in her home. While the world strives to put women in careers, Christ already liberated her from the oppression of other men and other bosses, by giving her the realm of the home. We miss the big picture when we allow young women to wrangle with words and wrest meanings out of one verse or word in scripture. They are all part of the brush strokes that make up the painting.

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LadyLydiaSpeaks May 8, 2008 - 11:32 am

being a good homemaker or trying to be is definitely different than the world, that says it doesn’t matter. Christian women will stand in contrast to the world that says women can have it all, work all day in a company and then go home and manage the home. A woman at home has the the job at hand. She doesn’t have to rush to juggle two jobs. And where the word of God is blasphemed, or when the enemy is given “occasion” means to me those times when they can say “aha! living by the word of God does not work. The women don’t do it. Their houses are a wreck!” Unruly, uncared for children, create an “aha” moment for the enemy who see that while we might claim to be Christians, we live just like the world, neglecting our children, our husbands and our homes.

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Miss Rebekah Ann S. May 12, 2008 - 9:42 am

Mrs. Sherman,

I was on vacation from Thursday afternoon to Sunday, so had really been missing this blog. I’m so glad I came back to this thread and read your great comments. They were so beautiful!

Have a blessed week,
Rebekah

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Mrs. Lady Sofia June 27, 2008 - 7:29 pm

Some of the discussions I have read here have really been an eye-opener to my mind. I’m not quite “all the way” homemaker/housewife at this time. I work 10 months out of the year, 3 hours a day, as a Teacher’s Aide at an elementary school. I’m currently on “vacation” enjoying the fruits of being a full-time housewife. I wouldn’t mind being a housewife 24/7, but it’s not easy to “give-up” a job when you have been conditioned to believe that you “have to work” for most of your life. But now, after reading “Passionate Housewives Desperate for God,” I’m starting to learn an entirely new way of thinking – and seeing first hand that there is nothing “bad” about wanting to be at home. This is just all so new for me. I would have never guessed that I had been “brainwashed” by feminism for SO long without even knowing it!

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FreeMommie October 22, 2008 - 1:37 pm

I know that I am little late on this discussion, but I couldn’t contain the urge to participate. I want to say that I both appreciate and was enlightened by all of the comments expressed on the topic.

However, I must agree with what Terry was saying. Terry, I think you are wise beyond the ages!

Bottom line for me is sin is sin. Where you are “straight” in one way, you’re “crooked” in another.
Our mission as followers of Christ is to draw the heart of men back to God through teaching and patience. Whether are not the scripture was interpreted correctly, the fact still remains that that is only one Supreme Judge; there is only one who will determine each one our fate and let’s pray in whatever area we lack to provide joy to our Maker that he shows us the same patience (with one more day to get it right), love (with blessings and favor), and most of all mercy (undeserved salvation) we are to extend to all of our brothers and sisters.

If I want to minister to a young single parent who was left by her husband for another man, I cannot go as far to say that she is now sinning because she works for a living. She now has to adapt and receive her blessing in whatever way she can, which dare I say might be nice-paying job! God grants favor even to the most unlikely candidates. Look at David, I mean, not the greatest guy, but just because He granted him favor, David lives eternally. He (David) surely disappointed God time and time again, but God showed deep mercy, love, and compassion.

He understands us for He created us. My daughter may not live exactly as I want her, but nonetheless she is my daughter and nothing will ever keep me from being her mother and loving her as long as she desires to have a relationship with me.

God before anyone knows our situation, those we had control over and those we don’t. He knows are short-coming and fears, but most of all He still loves us. He still accepts us if we accept Him. We’re not perfect and in a world that provides no role-models are structure for the home, for some, you just have to make due with the cards you are dealt.

Sure you believe that God will turn things around for you, but His will might change according to the bigger picture. His plan and movements cannot be simplified by us. We’re in no position to say for sure what way is God’s way, for they are mysterious, they’re too much for our feeble minds to comprehend past the basic instruction He has left for us.

If you’re in a position to homeschool and stay at home w/ the kids, then by all means, do it! Do it out of fear of God and for the intention of raising your children with the type of care that only a mother can give. Yet, as you homeschool and blog, pray for those who aren’t as priviledged and thank God for the apparent and undeservered favor He has granted you with. Not everyone can do what you do!

To me, there are no sure ways to Heaven because we’re not good enough.Period.

It is just the undying and forever-saving grace and mercy of God.

Let’s rejoice in it!

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Hayley Ferguson May 16, 2009 - 12:32 pm

I suggest that perhaps it is wrong for a Christian woman to live on her own. God puts the solitary in families. Now, if a woman comes to Christ as an adult (after having lived inderpendently) she would need (with the help of her church and much prayer) to seek a family in which to live. There are many ways to make money from home (thus not blaspheming the Word.) Especially because she is not married or attached she should have ample time here (and the church should also help her with this or maybe she can find a church that will help her.) If already in a two income debt lifestyle then obviously the aim/direction would be to be working toward working from home to be able to pay off the debt as quickly as is possible and if this is the heart then I believe that would put a woman in this situation in good standing with the Lord regarding His commands. I hope this made sense. If your husband is telling you to do something contrary to Scripture, is it right for you to answer to man or God?

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Jennifer July 17, 2009 - 8:45 pm

“Therefore, this passage is teaching clearly that it is a sin to not be a homemaker”

Thousands of women are not and have not been homemakers; this includes Nancy Demoss, Amy Carmichael, Corrie Ten Boom and her sister, and Joan of Arc. Terry, thank you for your words. Kelly, thank you for allowing them and sharing your own.

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Jennifer July 17, 2009 - 8:47 pm

Oh, and I missed the author of most of the original post. Kelly, thanks for posting Rebeckah’s question and allowing us all to post our thoughts.

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Jennifer July 17, 2009 - 8:49 pm

Ack, my first comment was lost. Just wanted to say that thousands of women have not been homemakers, including Christian women. But then, Rebeckah and I have had this discussion before.

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Jennifer July 18, 2009 - 2:12 am

Okaay, my first comment wasn’t lost after all, just delayed. I hate that.

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Jennifer July 28, 2010 - 12:46 pm

Indeed, a wife may be sinning if she’s not making a home for her husband, but this in no way forbids her from working outside the home. Likewise, as another pointed out, other things besides homemaking were mentioned in that passage; it was an attitude in general, a heart, that wives were told to have.

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Ji May 20, 2011 - 9:11 am

I’ll admit I’m new to Christianity but, what about Christian women who decide to remain unmarried (which, according to Paul, is also okay)? There’s nothing wrong with getting an education and having a career (especially if your parents keep pleasantly reminding you that you have to take of them when they retire ^_^” )…I, however, would love to have children one day…er… Is it wrong to skip marrying and just adopt??

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