Home Uncategorized Don’t Raise a Fool

Don’t Raise a Fool

by Kelly Crawford

Foolishness and wisdom seem to be a recurring theme in our family right now. Partly due to circumstances around us, and partly due to, what I think, is just the way God loves to shout messages at us to get through to our hard-headedness.

“He who walks with the wise will become wise; but a companion of fools suffers harm.

So simple, isn’t it? But we DON’T GET IT! Even aside from the issue of children spending the majority of time with peers in school (another topic altogether), we have the church which holds the Bible as its authority, and then sets up a paradigm that competes with the very instructions therein.

And though I’m certainly not saying that all peer-segregated activities are negative, we’ve made it the standard for virtually all interaction. From babies to the elderly, most churches separate its members upon entrance in the door and we miss the precious “walking with wisdom” opportunities meant to grow believers. Why do we disregard the wisdom of the very Word?

I think of how the constant segregation has robbed us from the wisdom of the elderly, and robbed them of their perceived value and worth.

But I think “walk with the wise” has deeper implications than even the people with whom we spend the most time…what about the people I read? Listen to via sermons, etc.? Magazines, books, music–am I being saturated–am I “walking with” wisdom? Are my children?

I don’t know about you, but I’ve never seen foolishness so rampant as now. Sometimes I’m listening to the news or the latest political rhetoric or, unfortunately, sometimes another believer, and I’m speechless for the foolishness that abounds, masked behind intelligent-looking and sounding adults! Do you know what I mean by the apparent “check your brains at the door” trend?

(So I had to ask my husband, “Why are fools running the country?”  And he said, “Easy.  Fools voted.”)

This lack of wisdom has massive implications for the quality of our lives. It affects our relationships, our finances, our values, our time–everything. And as we suffer for lack of wisdom, we become a people less and less able to discern truth or divide the Word. And that has resulted in a church full of brokenness, much of which, frankly, could be avoided.

The more I live, the more I see the need to pursue wisdom and teach my children to do the same. It’s easier to be “simple”. But it’s deadly.

Wisdom calls aloud in the street, she raises her voice in the public squares…”

Will we listen?

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Heather December 10, 2009 - 9:09 am

Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.Proverbs 22:15


It is interesting to me how so many Christians put the emphasis on “rod” of correction. The point is the correction of the fool.

The Lord corrects His children through consistent training, not the occasional (or even frequent) “beating”. That can only happen within the bounds of a loving, trusting Father-child relationship

At any rate, your post brought to mind some things.

1. We are engaged in spiritual warfare. I personally believe that as parents humble themselves and seek Godly discipline and for themselves, there will absolutely be repercussions as the enemy seeks to stir up strife amongst family members. I say this with confidence, because this past year has been amazingly difficult for the “peace” in our family even as Craig and I have prayed, sought and accepted the Lord’s correction in our own hearts.

The closer I get to realizing something that is TRUE—the more I ask God to show me what He alone can show me—the more persistently I knock on His door—the more difficult one or another children will be. For NO apparent reason.

So I am reminded to pray for wisdom for myself and for their protection as I do not wish for them to become victims of the Destroyer of souls.

Kelly, the tone of your most recent posts suggest to me that you are experiencing a similar awakening in your own soul. I won’t presume to guess at what the Lord is trying to show you, but will request the same for your family as I do for ours.

2. The Bible has much to say about what happens when parents neglect to raise their children in a God-honoring environment.

While I know this could easily lead into a debate about home-education vs. public school, I hope it will not. Because the main issue (and, I think the one you have always tried to bring forth concerning this topic) is that parents have been given a specific responsibility as “gatekeepers” of our children’s souls. We are to remain vigilant in our stand against Satan’s powerful and ever-deceptive attempts to worm his way into the hearts of the little ones so he may torment them. So many of us have carelessly NOT guarded over our children’s hearts by praying ceaselessly and living an example of one who LOVES Godly discipline.

The segregation of young children from parents is not the way God intends for them to be raised. When we look at the Scriptural model (Christ, Church, Individual believers) we can see a picture of Family as in Husband, Wife and Children. That is the way He has chosen to show us feeble minded fools what He is doing that we can neither see nor fully comprehend. And the devil wastes no opportunity to plant ideas that will destroy that picture and prevent us from seeing the truth.

The human “philosophy” of segregated learning is not Biblical. It is destructive because it causes young children to be trained by someone other than the designated care-giver and has the potential for introducing disruptive concepts that may not be wrong, but just distracting.

Distraction can prevent us from seeing truth just as surely as a well-crafted lie.

Even within the church body this can be a problem because the way we have institutionalized Christianity often results in spiritually crippled believers who are one step removed from having a vibrant, personal relationship with Christ.

3. It is sobering to see “adult” children running our country. If, collectively, humanity is seen as having the position of “childlishness” in relation to God’s wisdom, then I think it is safe to say that godless people are like the rebellious, careless son who (in spite of the father having done nothing wrong) demands to be given his inheritance so he can go waste it on selfish pursuits.

It suggests once again that we are a nation under judgment:

“Say to the righteous that it is well; for they shall eat the fruit of their doings.
Woe to the wicked! For the evil doing of his hand will be done to him.
As for my people, children are their taskmasters, and women rule over them. Oh my people, your rulers cause you to go astray and destroy the way of your paths.
Jehovah stands up to plead His case, and stands up to judge the people.” Isaiah 3:10-13

While I think society gives us a good idea of what is wrong, I’m pretty sure our number one duty is to address the same problems that are occurring within the church.

Have we cut ourselves off from our Head with our foolish attempts at religiousness, our infighting and lack of concern for God’s Word?

Interestingly, this is tangentially related to something I was recently contemplating.

At any rate, I’m praying for you all, Kelly. This is war, for sure.

Heather December 10, 2009 - 9:10 am

That can only happen within the bounds of a loving, trusting Father-child relationship (the loving correction, I mean)

Mrs. Team S December 10, 2009 - 9:14 am

Kelly- I have just started reading your blog and I wanted to let you know that is it such an encouragement! Thank you so much. Please keep writing as the Lord leads!

This topic of wisdom and foolishness has been a hot topic at our home this week. I was amazed to read your post this morning. Daddy has just assigned reading a chapter of Proverbs a day and finding a couple of verses to apply to our lives. Our oldest blessings are 10 and 7 so this is a stretch for them but it is SO good! I think the Lord is really going to bless my husbands efforts to impart wisdom into our children.

Thank you for being used by the Lord to confirm the direction we are headed.

Have a blessed day!

Kim M December 10, 2009 - 2:42 pm

We have been memorizing Proverbs ourselves. Oh that it will sink in!

Word Warrior December 10, 2009 - 6:20 pm


Lots of great insight you’ve given…thank you for praying too. It is warfare.

the cottage child December 10, 2009 - 6:55 pm

This is so important, thank you. I have recently been “awakened” so to speak to the subtle differences between good behavior and goodness, if that makes sense. I have incredibly easy going, well behaved children. It makes the managed (sort of) chaos that is our life very pleasant, with little disharmony. I don’t spend an inordinate amount of time on correction.

And there’s the problem. It’s not just good behavior, being nice, that makes up the Christian life. It occurred to me that I have been using this blessing of a peaceful co-existence as an excuse to do less teaching, Biblically speaking, when the exact opposite ought to be the case. Hello! I have these little baby birds sitting here with their mouths and hearts wide open, and I just tell them they’re sweet. Satan is a tricky opponent.

To borrow Heather’s description, that is how we’ve ended up with all of these “adult” children. They’re awfully polite, they just can’t do anything. They have been raised to be charming children, not adults. They’re parents (me!) have rendered them wicked and incapable of wisdom. Fools.

Ashley M December 10, 2009 - 10:41 pm

Hey Kelly, I love your blog! You are always so uplifting, encouraging, enlightening, convicting, etc… My comment is sort of off topic ..but not necessarily. You spoke of things we read & being unwise & such.. I was wondering if you could do a post about the Twilight series. You probably haven’t read them & probably don’t want to (I sure don’t) but I know many girls/women who are loving the books & movies & ‘Edward’. They are literally enamored w/all of it. I found a post by Elizabeth Botkin here http://visionarydaughters.com/2009/11/how-twilight-is-re-vamping-romance. It is very good & I already put it on my facebook but it’s not seeming to be quite loud enough. You are great at being direct & I know you would write an awesome post about that issue. Sorry this is so long & if you don’t have the time -of course- I completely understand! ;o) Thank you!

Word Warrior December 10, 2009 - 10:58 pm


Thank you for your kind words…

A post on the Twilight series would be fitting in light of this post; my hestitation is that I haven’t read them or seen the movies and so feel not quite qualified to speak about it. (Though I feel like I have from so many people around me talking about them!) The sheer “craze” is enough to give red flags.

I, too, read Elizabeth’s post (Elizabeth and Anna Sophia are incredible young ladies–I’ve talked with them on several occasions) and I wasn’t sure there was anything left to add to her beautifully-articulated article.

But it is frightening how a fictional series can pull people in and hook them so strongly.

I’ll think a little more about what I may have to offer to that topic 😉

Heather December 11, 2009 - 8:22 am

I shared my thoughts on Twilight a few months back on my blog. The post isn’t a well-crafted argument against reading or watching–just some observations based on my understanding of Scripture. The following commentary from readers might actually be of more value than the original post.

It is interesting, looking back, how well the post/discussion illustrates our need to develop a mature personal relationship with Jesus. I think a lot of these cultural dilemmas would be self-correcting if we Christians really would remember to take every aspect of our individual lives to the feet of the King and allow Him to determine for us what we, as individuals, can handle.

If you’re interested

authenticallyME December 11, 2009 - 10:22 am

She does have some good points in her article…concerning her definition of ‘pornography.’. But the woman was not made for the man, she was made for God. And I do not care for her ‘men not making breakfast’ excuse; women want to be loved and that is not selfish. God enjoys the right to love us; it is only natural and good that we desire our husbands to love us (just as we enjoy God loving us!), and show love. I dont like when women wanting anything is minimalized to pure selfishness, and points out their flaw of desiring love, and equate that to selfishness.

In general, I agree with Elizabeth’s assessment; these were just infractions I didnt agree with.

Word Warrior December 11, 2009 - 10:50 am


Because careful dividing of the Word is important to me, you said: “But the woman was not made for the man, she was made for God.”

The Bible says,

“…neither was man created for woman, but woman for man…” 1 Corinthians 11:9

Heather December 11, 2009 - 11:13 am

AM and Kelly,

I think you are both correct, but coming from different perspectives.

“Woman was made for man” is literally true. But it is also a symbolic truth.

Adam was the first man. Eve was made specifically to be his helpmeet.

Humanity (both male and female)was created specifically to be cared for and to commune with our Creator as individuals.

I believe Scripture describes the husband’s role as being a representation of Christ and the Church as a picture of His bride (humanity that has been chosen to have a special relationship with him).

Woman being made for God or man isn’t an “either-or” thing, but instead is “both-and”.

Word Warrior December 11, 2009 - 11:41 am


Agreed–precisely what I was thinking (writing in a hurry) and thought I’d elaborate if there was any rebuttal–thanks for saving me the time 😉

Kelly L December 11, 2009 - 11:59 am

Another great post!


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