Kelly Crawford

A heart-wrenching experience led me to remember a hint I thought would be good to give to mothers of infants. I hate to tie the two together, for reasons you will see, but I thought it would be good to share.

Sunday morning we got a call that a family we’ve known for a long time (and my sister’s best friend) had lost their 3 month old baby. The best they can tell (autopsy reports have not come back) the baby spit up in bed and aspirated.

My heart has been broken for this young family, and the grave-side service we attended Wednesday was so incredibly sad. That tiny casket…as a mother, watching another mother have to put her baby in the ground…and then walk away…it’s unthinkable to me and I could not stop sobbing as I watched.

Of course the accident was completely tragic and realistically unavoidable. And we believe God is sovereign over the timing of life. Yet, as mothers, there was the hum of “you just don’t know what to do….doctors tell you DO NOT put your babies down on their stomachs–backs only.” And of course the instructions have changed over the years.

And while I don’t want to underestimate God’s sovereign timing in the taking of a life, or remotely suggest that this baby’s life was ended “at the wrong time”, I know other mothers who hear these stories are left with fear and confusion about putting their babies down to sleep.

Years ago, we discovered a little secret we’ve done with all our babies. For the first 5 or 6 months of life, we let them sleep in their car seat. We tilt it back, put a soft, thick blanket in it, and wrap them snugly and nestle them down.

The two benefits I see is that this position seems to cuddle them more naturally as newborns, and they sleep better. This has always been our experience. Secondly, I worry less about aspiration or smothering because of their tilted position.

Just a helpful word I thought might be of some value to you mothers!

Don’t we all inhale the newness of the approaching year, saying “this year will be different, better–I will be different, better.” We write lists, make charts, set goals–all of which we should. And then the sneaking memory of our failures from the year before creeps in and tells us “don’t bother”.

We strive–and there is place for striving–but mostly we forget “The Lord will go before you.” We strive and fail, so we make more charts, try harder and finally give up…UNLESS, at the end of our striving we realize “His grace is sufficient for me; for when I am weak, then He is strong“.

Do I ever just leave the room, go to a quiet place, fall on my knees and strive there? What would life be like if I made a habit of this striving?

“He is close to the broken and contrite.”

I am the manager of my home, and as such, there are lists to make, things to improve–practical areas to govern.

But as the year begins, I will purpose to wrap these duties in humble prayer and petition to the Father. “If God is for us, who can be against us?”

And then, like the demonstration of placing larger rocks in the jar first so the smaller ones fit around it, I will prioritize the day, and put the big stuff in first. The stuff of eternal weight, no matter what others say is the most important.

I am prone to think that motherhood is a lot of crying out to God to bear me up, and a lot of smiling, talking and learning to enjoy my children as I try to show them glimpses of a Savior. Can I do those things? Won’t everything else fit in around that?

Devotions, Advice & Renewal for When Motherhood Feels Too Hard

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Whew!

Whose game for some words about sharing? *BIG SMILE*

My children were all very grateful and gushing with words of thanksgiving about their Christmas, for which I am truly grateful.

But the new toys always triggers heightened feelings of “mine” and as a parent, I’m really searching for the right way to maneuver through this opportunity to teach the mind of Christ.

Here’s the thing…you know I’m very anti-socialist. So part of me thinks, “OK, I cannot force them to share. That would be planting wrong seeds.” But then Scripture comes to mind, “If someone asks to borrow something, give him more than he even asks of you.”

So I find myself in a bit of a quandary with the right approach. It’s easy to say, “SHARE YOUR TOYS NOW.” And force them.

But this doesn’t do a thing for the heart, which is where I believe charity must come from. The difference in socialism and charity is that one is essentially stealing (I’m forcing you to share), and one comes from your own giving, which is the essence of Christian benevolence.

So, I’m curious about the way you’re teaching this to your children. It’s always been a struggle for me. They seem to be open about the concept in a non-confrontation. But at the moment of “May I see your toy?” they forget my earlier dramatization of Bible characters and I forget that my job entails constant, laborious yet patient lessons in humanity.

But I think these lessons prove crucial to a foundational attitude that will either be laid by our perseverance to teach it, or negligence to do so. I want my children to view their personal possessions as belonging to God, ultimately, and not hold too tightly to the things of this world. (“Set your affections on things above, not on things of the world.”)

Guess I have some work to do in this area as well! This is an important one!