Home frugal living/saving money Today’s Homemaker: Not What You Expected?

Today’s Homemaker: Not What You Expected?

by Kelly Crawford
Since sitting in on Mrs. Yvonne Welch’s teaching the other night, I haven’t been able to get a phrase (from Mary Kassian) she used out of my mind: “Let’s start a counter revolution”. 

That is, a counter revolution to the revolution started around the 60’s that has continually pulled women farther from home, their children and the love of family.

Whether she meant to or not, Betty Friedan, was forced to paint a bleak picture of the woman at home. Through interviews baited with questions like, “Tell me how you’re hurting“, women began to be soothed by the promise of a “fulfilling life” outside the home.

There truly were disgruntled housewives, because no one had given them the clear, biblical picture of their vocations! Men and women alike really were confused about God’s design. They were easy to sway because they thought they were “just housewives”. They had no vision, and no understanding of their power, so a glistening promise was an easy lure.

 

But there is a growing tide among women who are realizing the value and importance of the homemaker, and the lies that have been painted about her. They see the difference in a home where there is a manager present who takes her job seriously. BUT…the picture has been so distorted for so long, it’s going to take some work to resurrect the true, powerful image of the modern homemaker. 

We are not June Cleavers; but we value home, far more than just the idealization of it. I want to paint a picture. I need you to help me. It’s not a fake picture where we are dressed in ruffles all day and the children are perfectly coiffed. Nor is it a picture of a “desperate housewife” enslaved to her lowly duties within the four walls of home.

I want to challenge you to paint your own picture of the modern day homemaker (if you have a blog, start there; if not, start talking!) Our culture needs the true message–not a concocted one that props up a flimsy agenda, but a living, real message that tells women it is GOOD and NOBLE to devote their lives to strengthening their homes, communities and nations. That a home neglected is a weak home; and a weak home gives way to a weak neighborhood; and a weak neighborhood can only be a crumbling foundation for a nation.

 

There are too many women who don’t see motherhood and governing the home as a vocation–a job that is crucial to the success of everything else, just the same as the manager’s job is crucial to overseeing the success of his company. They truly don’t know. They have believed the lie that it is a weak option at best. We can overturn the lie and begin to undergird the family once again.

We’re talking about power–God’s way–to change the world.

Here’s my picture: 

We are a culture of real women, with real families and problems, but also a real understanding of the importance of our work in and among our homes and communities. We see a desperate need to return to a more simplistic way of living–for the health and good of all.

We are sharp; we are thinking women; we read; we have voracious appetites for learning, and for teaching our children those things.

We value education, and also sitting in the quiet of a day.

We believe that “the greatest among you is the servant of all“.

We utilize our computers to assist us with diagnosing an illness, and when we’re done, we hang our laundry on the clothesline to save money.

We learn to cook from scratch because it’s cheaper, healthier and wiser.

We make homemade laundry detergent (sometimes ;-).

We are on a never-ending quest to save money because “a dollar saved is more than a dollar earned”, and our husbands treasure that quality in us.

We believe motherhood is a vocation that comes with responsibilities, and we do what is necessary to fulfill them.

We delight in serving our husbands a cold glass of tea; not because he demands it or because we are subservient, but because we love him and cherish the smallest opportunity to communicate it. After all, he spends all day “speaking love to us” working hard, making sure the oil is changed, unstopping the clogged pipes, and all sorts of other ways. We don’t feel we’re in competition, but rather, we are partners.

We understand the very real fact that humans need serenity, and we make it one of our jobs to create that for as many as we can around us.

We try to look around us and see if we can meet the practical needs of others.

We think generationally….beyond today…into our great-grand-children’s lives. We journal about things we want our granddaughters to remember.

We teach our girls about strength and dignity, and our boys about honor and protection. We also believe in equality, and in a beautiful array of differences.

We care deeply about politics and what happens to our world; and that is why we are home MAKERS.

“If everyone will do what he has been called to do in his small territory, and hold that territory, we will see a spiritual revival, and a country once again blessed by God.”  -Gary North

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19 comments

HappyHermit March 23, 2009 - 9:55 pm

What you desire is why I even started my blog. Thank you for taking the time to share.

Reply
Doug March 24, 2009 - 12:17 am

Excellent Kelly! The Lord has often brought me back to the story of Nehemiah when he was rebuilding the wall and told everyone to work with a weapon in one hand and a trowel in the other. He said, “I am doing too great a work and I cannot come down!” when he was asked to interupt his work and meet with important people. We, too, must have this same mindset in the midst of the “daily” needs of life! May God renew this vision in us year after year and season after season! Even grammas are sooo needed in their homes!

Jill

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Quinn March 24, 2009 - 7:19 am

Inspirational!

Reply
Word Warrior March 24, 2009 - 7:39 am

Jill,

Yes! That is my favorite Bible story…which also became one of my favorite blog posts:

http://generationcedar.blogspot.com/2008/10/our-god-will-fight-for-uson-one.html

Thanks!!!

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Nicole March 24, 2009 - 8:08 am

thanks for the encouragement to post about this. I’d been meaning to write a post on my blog about why we decided for me to come home, and I think you’ve given me the inspiration to hurry up and do it!

This is an important work, keeping the home, loving our husbands, and raising up our sons and daughters!

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Lady-in-the-Making March 24, 2009 - 8:44 am

An awesome post, Kelly.

I am endeavoring to return to my home after working outside of it for 23 years of marriage and two children.

It’s never too late. Taking back our homes is vitally important – today more than ever.

Reply
Misty Smith March 24, 2009 - 8:44 am

I am in!

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Lori March 24, 2009 - 9:33 am

“Let’s start a counter revolution”.

Right, ’cause as Gary North also says, “You can’t beat something with nothing” You can’t just rebel against the norm, you must have a counter.

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Kim M. March 24, 2009 - 10:33 am

Good stuff! I love it! 🙂

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Kim M. March 24, 2009 - 10:38 am

P.S. I have heard a lot of women say, “I could never SIT AT HOME all day”. That statement in itself proves that women are clue-less as to what a true home-maker’s life is like. Another lady that I know is notorious for calling those stay at home moms in her family “lazy”. There is truly a deception out there regardless of what some may say.

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Gothelittle Rose March 24, 2009 - 10:55 am

For me, being a homemaker means an endless list of challenges, exciting and interesting, that tax me further than any career I ever tried after my schooling was done. I enjoyed the varied interests and schedules of college, and have never found anything like it except at the home.

Right now I’m pregnant and taking on the challenge of seeing how lovely I can make the nursery on the smallest budget. I take what we can afford and halve it, then see how my imagination can fill in the blanks. I read up on home decorating techniques and infant safety.

A few months ago, I was refinancing our mortgage. I was deep into explanations of points, rates, and terms, bothering the agent who was working with me with frequent questions. I learned about the different kinds of appraisals and how the appraisers work with the companies. By the time the new mortgage was ready to sign, I understood every bit of it.

My homeschooled son needs to understand the connection between history and reality, which is difficult for him due to something in his ADHD brain. So I’m planning to pepper his next school year with historical-based field trips. By the time I’m done planning, I’ll know all the major and minor history-based tourism in the tri-state area, hours and prices. I could probably get a job at a tourist information center.

But why would I want to? Soon it will be time to plant and I’ll turn gardener, learning how to put up a proper fence and whether or not land needs to be refertilized if it still looks pretty good. I have some actual tomato cages this time instead of bamboo sticks and twine, and we’ll see if they work better. I’ve never ordered chickens before in my life, though I’ve cared for them, and I need to find out how to request a set of pullet hens and how much it should cost.

I’m the political letter-writer of the family, staying on top of proposed bills and government statements. Our entertainment budget is comprised of my periodic jobs repairing computers, so I keep up on technology. I’m sewing the bridesmaid dresses for my friend’s upcoming wedding, and need to remember how to work with good satin. And I’m never going to finish my comprehensive series on the Koran vs. the Bible! Though I may be able to catch up on my reading in a few days to a couple of weeks, when naptime turns to breastfeeding.

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Kim from Canada March 24, 2009 - 12:47 pm

The phrase I have been repeating to myself came from different Vision Forum videos – ‘reforming everyday’

So often I am surprised that long time christians hold secular worldviews (rather than biblical worldviews) and don’t even know it! By studying to ‘show ourselves approved’ we can be reforming everyday and seeking a counter culteral way to live based on scripture. But…if we never seek the scriptures for ALL the areas of our lives, we end up living just like the world.

I’m with ya’, Kelly!

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Geniève March 24, 2009 - 1:28 pm

I like this post. Thanks 🙂

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Mrs. Lady Sofia March 24, 2009 - 3:50 pm

This was a beautiful post Kelly. Thank you for sharing.
This is especially encouraging for stay-at-home wives/mothers (smiles).

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Michelle (She Looketh Well) March 24, 2009 - 6:45 pm

Kelly, Kelly, Kelly,

Once again I have crying out to God wanting confirmation that I should continue with my blog because it is so hard to find that balance between wanting to SHOUT from the rooftops the wisdom and beauty of this calling on our lives and actually living it out everyday.

He has consistently shown me to keep up with encouraging women in this high calling of being a biblical woman. I felt like this post was one more reminder of why He has called me to do my blog.

I love your ‘picture’ it so mirrors mine and many others I am sure.

Thank you once again for picking me back up and reminding me of my purpose in this world!

Humbled by His Grace,
Michelle
http://www.shelookethwell.blogspot.com

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Michelle (She Looketh Well) March 24, 2009 - 6:55 pm

I almost forgot, I just recently posted “What if being a Mama is enough”
http://shelookethwell.blogspot.com/2009/03/what-if-being-mama-is-enough.html

Thanks Kelly

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Persuaded March 25, 2009 - 7:44 am

Wonderful, wonderful post…

And I love what you said about us sharing our homes and visions through blogging;) As a single mom and a homemaker, I am in a bit of a different position than most of the rest of you. But I am still a woman, still a mother and still have the same calling. I started my blog, really to give a different view of what being a single mom is all about… not just about stresses and trials and difficulties. Surely those things are present, but with the Lord our lives can be full of “lovely things.” I wanted to give hope to other single moms and a new and hopefully more realistic view of this life to others in the Christian subculture.

(I also wanted to provide some accountability to myself regarding keeping up with the never ending round of house work- but that doesn’t sound anywhere nearly so noble now does it?;))

Blessings to you and yours today♥

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Jen March 25, 2009 - 5:17 pm

Hi Kelly,
I was just wandering around Blogville and decided to drop in on yours. I appreciate this post. I am thrilled to know there are other women out there who take their vocation as wife and mother seriously and who are vocal about it! Keep it up!

🙂 Jen

Reply
Laura Angelika March 30, 2009 - 11:04 am

Amazing words!

Thank you so much for this insightful post!

Reply

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