Simplify: Time = Life.

Twenty-four hours–that’s all you get. Time is our most valuable commodity. We not only have a limited number of hours per day, but we are only given a limited number of hours to live. How we choose to spend this gift is very important.

Think about your family’s purpose, your goals, your vision. What do you want to accomplish in this small space of time here? What things are the most important to you?  Which things will last? Which things will soonest be forgotten? What kind of legacy do you wish to leave?

Refusing to acknowledge that our time here is pretty limited causes most people to twitter a great deal of it away. Time is our life. Wasted time is wasted life. Ouch.

A few activities that Americans seem to adore, even to the detriment of their relationships are:

• T.V.
• Computer/Gadgets/Games

These things are not inherently evil. But they can easily become enemies of our relationships if we don’t deliberately limit them.

According to the A.C. Nielsen Co., the average American watches more than 4 hours of TV each day. In a 65-year life, that person will have spent 9 years glued to the tube. Most families actually report that watching T.V. is the only “family time” they get. That is, most “family time” is spent watching other (usually fictitious) families live. It almost sounds crazy.

Consequently, many families report only engaging in a few minutes of conversation with each other each day! And we wonder why our problems!

While getting rid of the television may not be the right option for every family, I would suggest at least not keeping one in the main living space. Also, if T.V. time is greatly limited it is more likely to be enjoyed.

• Sports

Whether we’re playing or watching, sports have become an idol to many American families. The love of sports can root out important time around the dinner table, leave parents and children frazzled from the harried schedules and even pull families away from resting and worshiping together on the Sabbath.

I am NOT opposed to sports….unless they strain family relationships and rob families of their priorities. Lately I’ve seen school sports teams require inordinate amounts of time from their players at younger and younger ages. When families can’t participate in holiday gatherings because of sports commitments, it might be time to reevaluate whether it’s important enough to us. I would simply challenge families to consider the reason they are willing to devote so much time and energy to them. Is it a pursuit you’ll be glad you sacrificed so much for five years from now? Does it enrich your family? Does it still leave room for your highest priorities?

• Work

Obviously, someone has to work to pay the bills. But it’s important to make sure that the things we are working for is furthering our family’s purpose. If we are working to pay for all the extras that are already robbing our family of time and energy we may need to reevaluate our budget and activities. Perhaps a two income family would make it on one income if our pursuits were shifted around and there was more time to think about saving money and living more simply. Maybe hours could be cut back if we cut back other expenses that aren’t necessarily enriching our family.

• Computer/Gadgets/Games

In the most technologically advanced era to date, screens pulls us away from each other with an incredible force. We have to be deliberate to limit our time in these areas. I personally think it’s a bad idea to give children their own phones and gadgets. It certainly presents a bigger challenge for relationships and living simply, not to mention the suggested research on the mental harm these hyper-stimulating activities can have on developing brains.

There are huge perks to Internet access and the ability to reach anyone any time. But just because those conveniences are available doesn’t mean we have to be enslaved to them. Most of us feel obligated to answer our cell phones no matter where we are. I’ve noticed how many will answer their phones in the middle of a visit or dinner…something that would once be considered extremely rude. Turn off the phone, put limits around computer use and let’s keep our faces looking at each other!

Maybe we need a hard, honest look at the way we spend our time. Do we do the things we do because it makes us better and life simpler? Or do we do them to keep up with the neighbors? What do our children really need to grow into well-rounded adults?

Perhaps “budgeting” our time, as Dave Ramsey suggests with our money, would make sense. It’s not that it’s wrong to do fun things or have down time, but we must “tell” our time where to go or too much of it will slip away on unimportant things, leaving too little time for the important ones.

Let me leave you with a thought to ponder….”without relationships, we have empty lives…it’s all about relationships”. Be vigilant to keep them rich.