We’ve said it for years..
“Is Christmas really anything more to us than presents? Do our children understand?”
We talk of doing things differently, but each year finds us bustling around in the drizzle, searching frantically for something–anything–because we have to have a certain amount of presents for the children. They’ll be disappointed, won’t they? But we barely have room for the things we have now! Getting rid of perfectly good things to replace them by more things that will be replaced by more things next year.
And I LOVE giving things to my children! And my family. I love gifts and so this all seems so hard and confusing. I know one thing in my heart and I feel this enormous pressure (and desire) to do another.
And for the record, we spend VERY little, compared to the average family, on Christmas gifts. Which justifies my gift-giving because I can find a lot for a little!
Is there anyone else who struggles with this?
So, this year we’ve decided, inspired by the Voskamps‘ commitment (thank you, Ann!) to tangibly answer their heart’s questions, to really do something different.
Not AS different as they’ve chosen, not this year, but a beginning to refocus and reclaim Christmas as a holiday for gratefulness, love and reflection on what Jesus means to us.
“But Mom…. if we get wrapped presents for our birthdays, real sacrifices from people who love us — they gave up other things to give something to us — then why don’t we do that for Jesus’ birthday?”
“Why don’t we give up things so we can give to Jesus for His birthday?”
Is it always this way, that a little child will lead them?
He was four or five that year, I can’t remember. I just know that now he’s fifteen and I stepped out into the light and we’ve done all the Christmases since his way, giving away. It’s not at all wrong to do it differently, but just for us… all the Christmas gifts — gifts for the Christ Child.”
Read all of “Christmas: Thinking About Whose Birthday It Is”
We will still bestow small gifts on the ones we love…but we hope to move the focus and help our children begin to develop a love for giving to Jesus by giving to the least of these. We want to teach them that a small sacrifice for someone less fortunate is better than having so much stuff you don’t know what to do with it. We want to make it a habit of looking outside of ourselves, not just at Christmas.
We want to embrace gratitude as a greater gift.
We’re excited about this Christmas season…
How is your family infusing the real meaning of Christmas into this commercialized season? I would love to hear it!
96 comments
We gave up Santa. We lowered our budget. We are sending gifts to 2 men in active duty in the Army, and sending cards to about 40 more. We are using Ann’s Jesse Tree devotion as well. Our kids give gifts to each other as well (it’s a surprise who got who until Christmas Eve). We celebrate Christ’s birth everyday, knowing He became man for us, and take communion every Sunday (well, those of us who are Christians) to remember the sacrifice He made in His death.
Having DVR helps block out all of that extreme commercialization. If they do watch some t.v., we skip them. This year we also banned video games for presents, as we barely let them out these days…went to simple gifts, like Legos and Frontier Logs. 🙂
Samantha,
My husband is a deployed soldier and I want to say Thank You for thinking of our troops during the holiday season! I know this war has been going on for a long time but let me tell you it is now more than ever that our soldiers need our appreciation. A lot of these guys including my husband are on their third or fourth year long tour. The kids and I are putting boxes together for single soldiers and for my spouse and brother who is also deployed.
Thank You so much!
Sarah L.
Sometimes I think it is hard to keep things balanced. We are so very blessed that even though we give a lot, it’s not truly sacrificial. We are so thankful for the Lord’s incredible blessing. But I do struggle with helping the kids truly understand the sacrificial part. We had read Ann Voskamp’s post the other day and just tonight, one of our sons said that he wants to do that with his Christmas next year. But as I look around our home decorated top to bottom, inside and out and then think about Ann’s trip to Guatemala, it is hard to not feel guilty. I, too, LOVE to give our children gifts, and so we just need to keep praying about any “adjustments” we need to make. I think the key is not holding on to things and being willing to allow the Lord to direct any or all of our resources in any way He asks.
very good post! I would love to read how you all do it, we are in the middle where some family member buy us and our children way to many stuff and we don’t know what to do with it all. And us not giving expensive things and being look down because we to not encourage materialism, it’s a difficult place to be!
I know exactly how you feel. My husbands side of the family picks names for the extended family memeber to buy for. There is extreme pressure to buy “good” gifts and not something homemade or recycled (toys our children no longer play with that someones esles child will enjoy). I look at my niece and nephews and see no need, only children who have more than enough, and I am clueless what to get them.
We’re doing the same thing here… I have picked up (or been given for free) one toy for each child, they’ll each get a book (most of them used), and a stocking with candy, chapstick, pencils. We haven’t done “Santa” for years, and we try to keep our focus on Christ and giving to others in December. Ann’s posting last year really spoke to me, and I shared it with hubby, and he agreed that we needed to focus more on others… and this year we are doing even more than last year. I’m so excited! We do a simple craft/baked good each day to give to someone, we are doing Ann’s Jesse Tree each day, and we are giving all of the money we would have spent on presents to children through World Vision and Voice of the Martyrs. We also usually do a shoe box for each child through Operation Christmas Child. Our children have not missed out on anything! They are learning to love others more than themselves through doing this. Hope this helps! God bless you Kelly and Merry Christmas! 🙂
Love it! It’s worth emphasizing that “not doing Santa” takes so much pressure off of the parents to give their children the “magical” Christmas that Santa promises. That has been such a relief to us and our children love Christmas all the same.
I meant to put that I pick up each child’s toy from the annual kids consignment sale in town… oops! I just realized it when I reread this. Your certainly right about the pressure part. This is so much more enjoyable for all of us. I do not feel the pressure to make everything perfect because the focus isn’t on us, so my children don’t have to deal with a frazzled mommy for an entire month- everyone wins!
We do a substantial amount of shoeboxes also, and are more than doubling our goal for next year. This year, we are also going to give the kids a set dollar amount and let them choose projects out of the Samaritans Purse catalog to support. They will choose a project each night for 10 nights. We also try to help oout at least 1 or 2 families or single moms at our church anonymously. We give cash in an unsigned card, or give through the church’s elders. Our kids LOVE to give, so Christmas becomes more exciting every year!! Dawn
Funny that you should post this very thing because I just posted about this this afternoon! http://refrigeratorofthemind.blogspot.com/2010/11/another-frugal-christmas.html
I stopped Christmas shopping two years ago. We do have a turkey dinner. I stopped sending out cards and buying “made in China” holiday decorations. We never did Santa(Satan) but gave our 6 children the history of how our country(the Puritans made Christmas illegal) recognized Christmas. We learned in a Messianic church that Jesus was probably born in September(Luke 1)and Jeremiah 10:2-4(KJB) refers to the Christmas tree. My three sons married Catholic girls(the Catholic church took the pagans’ Dec. 25th holiday-Saturnalia which is still celebrated today). We always had a tree, the tremendous pressure from family,etc. but I am set free. I asked the family if we really needed to have a tree(one year a real one gave me the worst migraine from the fumes)- I don’t think it’s safe for the 4 granddaughters(so far). I pray they listen because I watch the babies every weekday. Not everyone in our Baptist church agrees with me. Jesus-is-lord.com has interesting holiday info in the Believer’s Corner. We don’t celebrate Halloween or Easter(Herod’s Easter-Acts 12:4 KJB)-no Easter baskets etc. either. Our church agrees with that. lasttrumpetministries.org has some good online tracts.
Our Christmas will be a bit more frugal this year out of necessity, but I’m working hard to figure out great homemade gifts and inexpensive ways to celebrate. My goal is to have the most glorious Christmas yet, to image as well as I can to our toddlers how God lavishes upon us such glorious gifts. The challenge of doing it all on our budget just makes it more fun and means I have to be more intentional!
Here is a post that rocked my Christmas perspective last year: http://www.feminagirls.com/2009/12/02/reckless-giving
This is a great perspective, Natalie! Thanks for sharing! Don’t you just love those Wilsons?
We did away with Santa too. We enjoy him like any other fairytale, and yes, it has brought so much freedom!
We do still give gifts, one ‘fun-ish’ asked for gift, and then a few needs (when else do you buy socks, undies, and such?)
We have made a point to give, and give this year. Extra to our Compassion Child, Christmas Shoe Boxes (with virtual tracking, so fun!), and I would love to buy 28 Farm Animals…but I think a Goat and A Pair of Chickens will be it, this year.
We plan to continue to make this a Special time of year, because it is so Special. Full of memories, and tradition, and love…and JESUS! The Nativity, Advent, and blessing and serving and praying for others.
Great post…wonderful comments (how do I subscribe to those?)
~Kathi
I recommend “12 Ways of Christmas” by David Jeremiah! Beautiful book and so useful for this. Thanks, Kelly.
My husband and I came out of the Catholic church as teenagers. My husband is from Germany and had been steeped in cultural traditions, we celebrated a worldly/Catholic/American/German mix of Christmas until becoming believers in Christ. We gave up Halloween immediately and stopped Christmas a few years later. It never felt right to my husband and our two youngest were very afraid of Santa. Our first step was to give up Christmas Day dinner and go out distributing home baked breads/muffins and scarves and blankets to the homeless. The children loved it! Eventually we did more research on the history/origin of Christmas and shared what we learned with the children. They did not want anything to do with something that might be displeasing to God. (They were ages 4-11 then). It was surprisingly easy and natural for them, very hard for me – I kept feeling guilty at first. I used to go all out, even candles on the tree – and yes we lit them! Cookies for Santa, Reindeer food etc.. Presnts, presents, presents? OH YESSS did I love to give. Now we do not have a tree, decorations, gifts, or a special dinner. We are trying to focus on giving day in and day out all year long. Giving time, talent, money, giving ourselves. Not just to one another but to anyone in need the Lord brings our way and also seeking out those in need. I cannot even begin to tell you the wonderful changes we have experienced.
This is something my husband and I have been debating over the last few years. We decided this year that Santa will be what he is…..a fairy tale. Gifts will be minimal(just for the kids) and Christmas will be meaningful. We are making candy/cookies for friends etc but aren’t stressing about it either. We too are following A Holy Experiences Jesse Tree Devotion but are using our Christmas tree to hang the advent ornaments.
My question is: What do you do when your relatives REFUSE to go easy on the gift giving? Our boys already have so much but my mother refuses to stop buying (trust me-she goes way overboard). This year we threw our hands up in the air and decided that if she wants to play “santa” that’s her choice as long as she realizes that for every thing that comes in….one must go out!
Love this post and discussion!
Jeannie- great comment. We too came out of the Catholic church as teenagers and were married in the Baptist church. Too bad Martin Luther kept Christmas and infant baptism(Matthew 3:16KJB) after Reformation Day. Peter Marshall wrote a book about Christmas- I didn’t even give it away. Laura Ingalls Wilder and her husband were Masons/Eastern Star(keepersofthefaith.com- articles/book reviews). I never buy my grandchildren plastic toys,etc. Their parents can do that. I’ll buy books on birthdays.
I appreciate this post and the comments. We have never done Santa, although we don’t think he’s evil or anything, my children would just never believe that we let some over-weight man with a scraggly beard come in our house and bring them things. 😉
We do Advent and Jesse Tree and have enjoyed this so much…the children too. An we give simple, homemade (mostly)gifts to our children and each other (one, maybe two gifts each). We also give more than usual to a ministry (we choose a different one each year and talk about it with the children). We try hard to teach our children (4 1/2yrs, 3yrs, 1 1/2yrs) that Christmas isn’t about them.
The thing we struggle with the most, is all the stuff that relatives give our children. It is very confusing to our oldest two children, escpecially our oldest. She doesn’t understand why people give her all this stuff, when it isn’t her birthday. And to make things more confusing , when our children’s birthdays come around, these same relatives do nothing for them at all. And it isn’t that we expect them too, it just seems backwards to us. We have even asked them, that if they just couldn’t agree with not buying so much, if they would at least give it to the children on *their* birthdays and not Christmas. We end up taking most, if not all, of the stuff back to the stores (if we can figure out where it came from, if not we take it to a consignment store) and then get gift cards and give some of them to children’s homes and use some to let our children choose a book/game.
If Christmas is truly about Christ, if this is the “holiday” that is set aside to celbrate the birth of the God child, then I don’t know if there can be a “balance”. Shouldn’t it lean (very clearly) to what it is truly about? Shouldn’t we look different here, as Christians? I’m still uneasy about it all…praying.
I’ve been mulling over this same topic. I think we need to find a good balance, but I do know we’ve missed the mark so far with what our kids have been conditioned to think of when they hear the word “Christmas.” I blogged about it the other day: http://gracefulabandon.blogspot.com/2010/11/reflections-on-worth.html
The conclusion I’ve reached is that we’ve taught our kids to think Christmas = gifts … now it’s time to un-teach and re-train with the right mindset!
This year will be the 3rd Christmas w/o a gift exchange at our home. Trying to think of meaningful gifts for 5 children, plus gift ideas for 2 sets of grandparents and one generous aunt to give to our children; just about sent me over the edge! That, and the increasing feeling of discontent — this is Jesus’ birthday — not ours! Led us to “step out on a limb” and do something radical.
Surprisingly, the kids are fine with it (ages 5-16). We did replace the Christmas Eve gift exchange with a “Bethlehem Supper” (laying on the floor to eat foods that Israeli’s might eat — olives, citrus, fish sticks, breads, etc.) and a layette kit packing time (each child puts together 2 baby bundles) for needy mothers and newborns in foreign countries.
To us, it seems like a more appropriate way to celebrate the One who left the splendor of heaven to become like us, that we might live with Him one day.
As a few of your other commenters have said, we no longer celebrate Christmas either. We came to realize that God never TOLD us to celebrate the birth of Christ and He is very particular about how He wants to be worshiped. i.e. The Regulative Principle of Worship.
So, since celebrating Christ’s birth, the date of which is unknown…hmmmmm…..is not given to us by God as something which we are to celebrate, we don’t. The commercialization of Christmas and its pagan roots just add to our conviction that this is something that our family will not participate in.
As for gifts, our budget is no longer forced to comply with the calendar. In years gone by, the obligatory giving at the end of the year had the potential to harm our family finances and put us in bondage for a long time. Not credit card bondage, but just very tight finances for several months before and beyond Christmas because of obligatory spending. We always had to be frugal with purchasing Christmas gifts, but even with being frugal, it put us in financial bondage.
Now, when the Lord blesses us with the means, we buy family gifts that everyone will enjoy and/or benefit from, and when the Lord provides, we purchase nice things for our children as we come across those opportunities. It’s much more of blessing to purchase these things as the Lord provides, not by our society’s calendar.
We give presents to our children for Christmas and their birthday’s…The only times they get a gift from us…We bake cookies for the local fire department and police department, we give coats to needy children, help other’s with meals. Our children know that its important to help other’s out. I keep a jar with coins for the kids to give to the lady at the grocery store ringing the bell (salvation army), they enjoy doing that. My children draw names for each other and buy a small gift with their own money, I think they are more excited about their brother or sister opening the gift from them on christmas then opening their own gifts…I love the hearts of my children….
I’ve wanted to do this for years, and really, we spend very little on Christmas presents ourselves. But, what can you do when Grandparents, Aunts and Uncles disagree? Many already think we are “scrooges” for not letting them “believe in” Santa Claus (and generally “fanatical” for other choices we make because of our faith). I don’t know how to communicate these ideas in a way that will be well-received.
Tiana~ I have this same issue with my in-laws. In fact I was told that my poor kids wouoldn’t have a good Christmas because they wern’t getting a tons of things. All I try to do is demostrate our family’s beliefs and pray that one day they will get it. Until then, there is nothing I can to to control them, but I can control what Christmas is in our house. If you haven’t I would recommend reading the post link that Kelly has above. The Voskamps share a very similar story there. Praying you are able to find peace admist the negativity you are facing.
My kids are 4 and 2. Since last year we have decided to only give them 3 gifts each, it was good enough for our Savior it is more than ok for my kids. We don’t do Santa. Mommy and Daddy work too hard for an imaginary creature to recieve the credit. Starting this year we are going pretty practical. One toy, one item to wear (clothing or jewlery), and more educational something (art supplies, book, pencils). I have enjoyed the reduced stress and not too mention we are not using up all our financial resources. With everything we are doing we are teying to bring the focus back to Him. Cooking? Feed the hungry as Jesus did. Decorating? Setting up for His birthday. Present shopping? Giving something tangeable to our love to others as Jesus physically died and showed us how much He loves us. We are also using Ann’s Jesse Tree Advent (it is amazing!). Basically the main point is whatever you or any of us does, we need to keep Jesus the focus. He is the reason for the season.
Interesting to read all the comments. We feel led to do Christmas. I am very frugal and find amazing deals. In fact, the average I spend on family members this year was $16. (THe gifts for my daughter were a lot higher) And I got them fabulous things. We have an extensive list including my husbands’ office. I am making bundt cakes for the colleagues and 2 dozen cookies each for secretaries and TAs. That saves me a ton while allowing my daughter to help make gifts for others.
I never fully understand how there is an implication out there that if you buy lots of gifts your focus is off of Christ’s birth. I buy stuff all the time for our household, and a lot we don’t even need, but just want (how much do we NEED?). But my focus EVERYDAY is on Christ Jesus, Holy Spirit and God. Christmas time is no different. I guess if buying thing/receiving things causes idolatry in one’s heart, that person SHOULD stop doing it. But to assume everyone else is doing something wrong is a little over generalizing. “Whatever you do, wether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord” Give in the name of the Lord. Receive graciously and with thanks in the name of the Lord.
We give a lot all year round including Christmas. The best part is shopping for children whose families have fallen on hard times. I let my daughter ask God what to give each child, and she gets to listen and pick it out. We rarely walk past a Salvation Army bucket without dropping in some money. We give money to the homeless when they approach us in the parking lot. If we really “esteem others better than yourself” (Phil 2:3 one of my favorite verses ever) than Christmastime is no different than any other day of the year.
True, a lot of what we do is not sacrificial giving. We have found that when we obey God on what to give and to whom, He ALWAYS ends up blessing us with extra money (we give out of obedience and love for God, not to be rewarded by Him, just to be clear). Thus, even when we think it is going to make things tight, God always ends up giving us an over abundance because He is so full of Grace and Mercy.
just my 2 cents or maybe 10, this is long. 😉
Jesus being born in September has something to do with Luke 1- John the Baptist’s birth, v.8-Zacharias-“…in the order of his course.”- it’s suppose to be the 8th course-v.24-“five months” then v.26-“sixth month”. The Messianic Jews we knew (in FL- we now live in NY) said it was easy to figure out. They knew what year on the Jewish calendar and what Jewish holidays in September our Lord was born(the atheists should have a conversation with them- they say it’s all a myth- their billboard in NYC says that). Anyway we threw out many gifts. I remember the year my mother gave one of our sons a statue(we don’t have/like statues) of E.T. We had no idea what this ugly turtle without a shell was. She said we were the only family in America who didn’t see the movie- besides the Amish. We have friends that have a Christmas Gift Closet in their basement- everything labeled so when people visit they take their gifts out-as if they are always out. She says she grew up in a big family that also secretly had a gift closet.
God is so generous, so overwhelmingly generous with us. I love to let this generousity towards my children with no strings attached come out to play all year and especially at Christmas. I give them what I am financially able. I try to give them what they really like. I try to find out who they are and to foster their interests and loves. I want them to know that Christmas is a celebration of the most amazing, selfless Person who has ever been born, Jesus. To those who say, Christmas is pagan because of it’s pagan roots… I say, Christ has redeemed us. Can’t He redeem a day? And even the days of the week are named after pagan gods! Yet we still call them by those names. A day to make merry and love and pour out blessings and celebrate? It’s not more godly one way or the other. There is a balance as in all areas of life. Finding your own balance in life, with freedom, grace, and joy is the challenge. Calling Santa “Satan” is just silly. Goodness, must we find Satan under every rock? I think of it like in Narnia, when the White Witch kept it always winter, but never Christmas. Let’s be generous, to our families to others, with our beloved spouses! And with our time, money, talents, and prayers. Give!
Yes, Holly! I say redeem the season as well! How exciting to think of the coming of Christ for believers over 2000 years ago and we can look forward to Him coming again(!) and reflecting on that at this time. This season can a reminder to be radically generous as a reflection of the Lord’s extravgant love for sending his only begotten Son. I can’t see how a faith-filled heart celebrating His kindness and therefore loving others could displease Him. Even if there is paganism and rampant cultural materialism..is that not happening everyday?
“Goodness, must we find Satan under every rock?” Isn’t that the truth, Holly? – we go out of our way to find the enemy in nooks and crannies, when he is usually right in front of our faces (and frequently on our tongues).
I just think it’s interesting that if you move the letters around you get- satan. Yes, the days and months are pagan names. I am not a fan of C.S.Lewis or his good friend Tolkien. keepersofthefaith.com has a review of Lewis, etc. Their articles and book reviews are very interesting. I read somewhere that the Puritans use to call the days of the week- first day, second day,etc. Maybe that was a good thing.
Does rearranging the letters really mean anything, though? God can become dog, but that doesn’t mean that God is a dog or that dogs are gods. It just mean that they contain the same letters, nothing more, nothing less.
*Like*
We have 7 children now so gift giving gets expensive if we’re not careful. Several years ago we decided to move to giving only 3 gifts each year to each person in the immediate family. We base it on the 3 gifts given to Jesus – Gold, Frankenscence (sp?), and Myrrh. The Myrrh gift is something for the body or taking care of oneself. We started the tradition each year of giving PJs to all the children on Christmas Eve so this is their Myrrh gift. Frankenscence is something that will help them grow in their walk with the Lord. For the new reader, it’s their first Bible. For an older child we might give a new study bible or a book that will help them grow in the Lord. For younger children, we give them well written Christian books. The Gold is is something that might be really special. We used to make this a toy or something that could be learned, such as a craft. This year we’re doing something different. They all traded names and are making each other gifts this year. This allows them to really give some thought into what they would do to bless the other person. One of these days I want to apply something that I read in Noel Piper’s book “Treasuring God in our Traditions.” They use Shepherd’s bags instead of stockings. The boys would put money that they wanted to give to Jesus in their bag. On Christmas Eve they collect the money and combine it into a jar. When they wake the next morning they find “blessings” for Jesus for their sacrifices. i was going to make the bags with pretty material but my 10 yod wants to make the bags with leather so I giving him that job next year. We really try to keep Christ the focus in our holidays. Another thing that Noel Piper talked about what decorating. When people walk into your home what do they see is important? If we have more Santa, Reindeer, snowmen, gingerbreads, etc, in the house than Nativity, that will send a message. Without the incarnation we don’t have His death and resurrection. We also try to make sure that we use this season to serve others. Many years that includes adopting a family. tighter years means Operation Christmas Child boxes. As an exercise this year, my three oldest had to pack a shoe box of essentials and pick out one pair of clothing they could wear for two days. they are living as if all they own in is in their box, just like the kids that receive those christmas boxes. We may do that every year. We had a cold front that came into our part of the country and none of them could fit coats into their boxes. Talk about a lesson learned. We definitely do not have Santa in the mix. We don’t watch alot of the shows and movie anymore either. These ideas and practices just match our desire to lift Christ up as glorified in this time. These are just some of the ways that we focus on Christ in this season. thank you for the challenge to consider this. There is a campaign out there to “Keep Christ in Christmas”. While I couldn’t agree more with the idea, I wonder when I see those signs on the cars and such if Christians really do keep Christ in Christmas. Does our holiday look any different than the secular? I don’t have a problem with gift giving and such, but if our month of celebration doesn’t reflect a different focus and nature than simply a fat guy in a sleigh and mass amount of stuff accumulation, then we’re not keeping Christ in Christmas either. Merry Christmas!! karen (BTW, I haven’t read the other responses. I can’t wait to have time tonight because know that others have great ideas. 🙂
I think it’s strange that the word-mas(s) is in Christmas. Having been raised Roman Catholic and educated mostly in Catholic school-we went to mass every Sunday. When I was young we were told it was a mortal sin to not attend mass then it was changed to a venial sin-now I don’t know what kind of sin they call it. I was told that mass meant -death- and Christmas means death of Christ. I think it sounds weird to put “Merry” in front of that. And it doesn’t makes sense until you get into the history(Saturnalia-birth and death). And we have to be careful with that word-generous. I have a friend who is generous- with her charge/credit card(many are in debt). I have never worked outside the home and never charged anything. Also, I have to mention that we have Scriptures(KJB) on our walls all year.-Respectfully
I wonder if George Washington celebrated Christmas. Remember he had his soldiers attack the German Hessians at Christmas because he knew they would be drinking and celebrating. Christmas became popular in our country when Americans became fans of Queen Victoria and her German husband in the 1800s.
This year our family is doing something different for Christmas. We are getting three presents: A gift meant to further us in our Christian walk, a gift that addresses a physical need, and then a gift thats just for “want”. The idea is based off of the Three Wisemen’s gifts of Gold(want), Frankincense(spiritual), and Myrrh(physical). Our family has limited resources so we thought instead of spending a whole bunch of money on things we don’t need we would do it this way. Any extra will be sent to Gospel of Asia to buy animals for families that will bring income for those families.
Thanks for the link! My dh and I have very simple Christmases but I LOVE the idea of giving gifts to Jesus (When I was thirsty you gave me something to drink). I am going to discuss this with him tonight, hopefully. We are really looking for ways to keep the focus on
Jesus..even our pastor touched on it Sunday.
Like many posters here, we still have the problem of one grandparent who goes totally overboard shopping for our children (and everyone else) so we are still coming up with solutions to that one.
I’ve really enjoyed all the different perspectives and insights from you all! I’ve been a little out-of-pocket because our whole house has the stomach
virus :-/
I was up all night with 5 little ones getting sick like dominoes! At one point, I had 3 with me, running back and forth, juggling buckets, towels, etc., and while assisting one, the baby rolled off the couch into her bucket—EWWWWW!
All six who have gotten sick got sick during the night. That’s no coincidence…that’s a virus with a vengeance.
This too shall pass 😉
Oh gracious Kelly! I hope your wee ones are better very soon. Prayers for you that God will allow you to be super-woman for at least a few days, until it is all past. 😉
Oh gross, poor things; iccckkk! I had something strange right before we left our Thanksgiving North Carolina house to return home, then I felt ill again in the car, but God was awfully good; I didn’t become physically ill until I was safely at home, after our long trip back was finished. I also didn’t become physically ill up in NC until everyone was gone at dinner and I had the house to myself. Thank you God!
Well, on the bright side Kelly, at least you weren’t also suffering pregnancy sickness during that all-night nightmare. I hope.
In Booker T. Washington’s great autobiography-Up From Slavery-(Abeka)in chapter 9 he writes about Christmas. He says the children in Alabama went “…rapping at our doors, asking for ‘Chris’mus gifts! Chris’mus gifts!” He said people were expected to get drunk but when he worked at Tuskegee he gave them “…lessons in its proper observance.” I remember when I celebrated Christmas after reading Matthew 2:11 I threw out the 3 wise men statues in our indoor and outdoor nativity sets(the Bible says there were 3 gifts not 3 wise men and they later went to “the house”). I read that The Creation Museum no longer has an innkeeper in their Christmas display.
As Christians were to flee idolatry (Christmas is idolatry) and were to ignore fables and tales. Having said this my husband is currently on the phone with his mother who wants to know what to get the 8 children for Christmas (AAGGHHH!) and my mother asks everytime we talk on the phone as well. Two years ago we attempted to stop celebrating altogether and both my parents unbeknownst to each other said the other parent might be dead by the next Christmas and in one case actually said it would be my fault. Christmas was never about the spirit of Jesus Christ. A pagan at my husbands work was amazed that he was the only Christian she’d ever met who understood this. It seems so crazy to these people that we should tell them to remember the “true spirit” of Chistmas as if it were celebrating Jesus birth. Jesus himself said remember my death until I come again (not my birth…and this is not easter either…easter is a fertility festival/celebration…although fertility is a wonderful thing we don’t worship it like we worship God, He is a jealous God.)
Your superstition never ceases to amaze me; you don’t think we should even remember His birth? Christians are free to celebrate His miraculous Being without committing the commercialism the world does. The idea that Christmas itself is idolatry because some treat it thus shocks me.
How is Christmas idolatry? I really don’t get that. Taking a day to remember our saviors birth is evil?
The angels filled the sky with their singing and celebrating on that night. It was clearly something to be excited about. Our savior was here at last! How we choose to celebrate will look different. For the shepards, they witnessed an angelic choir, years later men from the east brought gifts. We choose to take the blessings God has given us and bless those around us with gifts and presents, good food, time spent together. We decorate our house fit for a king to come visit with evergreen, lights, ornaments and such.
Pagans may have been celebrating something on this same day years ago, but that is not what we are celebrating now. Whatever they were celebrating is lost on us, we don’t know. What WE are celebrating is our Savior’s birth. (No matter what his actual birth date is makes no difference.) We are putting aside THIS day to remember he came to earth as a baby, to live with his creation, so one day he may die for us. What is there not to celebrate? Because we decorate for his birthday it is somehow pagan and idolatry? Because we give gifts in rememberance of his gift to us, we are somehow doing something wrong?
Sorry ladies, but I can’t follow that line of thinking at all!
Quite right, well said! 🙂
Start by reading Leviticus 23,the G-D of the Bible has his own Holy Days no need to borrow others.
I worked at a federally funded food bank and got to know a pagan family very well they were very interested in the fact that we did not celebrate christmas and said they always wondered why Christians fought so hard to make their pagan holy days christian, when Christians have their own holy days written out for them in the Bible. We are to stand out from the world not fight to be like them.
As for pagan beliefs from years ago look up the European kindred, paganism is still alive and thriving Santa is based off oden. I know my mother in law claims oden and all the littler gods that go with his are real and gives gifts from oden\santa every year.
If you want more information I suggest you watch “Sunburned” by 119 ministries, it’s free on youtube.
I guess I’m as lost as they come – we love Christmas, the Holy and the secular celebrations, both. We have rearranged our priorities, certainly, as our faith and understanding have grown, and our children have matured, age-wise and spiritually. We no longer have the over the top consumption based celebrations that were the hallmarks of our early married life – our radical this year is no gift exchange on Christmas day. The kids are still getting presents, over eleven of the twelve days of Christmas, but none on Christmas Day. Christmas eve will be spent serving a community meal, before enjoying our own with family at home and at Church.
I don’t think it would be an accurate observation to suggest Santa is Satan. The St. Nicholas story is a fun history lesson to break up the winter home school blues, and we have fun sneaking around leaving money and cookies and groceries for folks who wouldn’t have any of those things otherwise. I think it has more to do with the positive aspects of the putting away of childish things (I’ve always heard that verse in my ears with a sense of spiritual upward mobility, of graduation, not the “now I’m an adult, it’s all downhill from here” Eeyore mentality that it’s so often attached to it). As our children’s understanding grows, so lessens the desire for the novelties of the secular. How many presents they do or don’t receive has little to do with it, I imagine, in God’s eyes, as long as making room for the Real Gift is what’s being celebrated.
Bless your sense, Cottage.
“I don’t think it would be an accurate observation to suggest Santa is Satan”
Whatever you do, don’t watch “Santa’s Slay”..
This is the first year that I have read so much on celebrating Christmas. I’m sure it will be something our family continues to ponder, especially since we have 3 little children already. While I agree that Christmas has gotten somewhat out of hand, something about the whole idea of forgoing presents and only serving others doesn’t sit right with me. I should mention, too, that there is a whole litany of information out there regarding why it is not a sin to celebrate the birth of our Savior. Here’s a good start to some of the issues:
http://jeffreyjmeyers.blogspot.com/2007/11/christmas-time-is-here-again.html
http://jeffreyjmeyers.blogspot.com/2008/12/is-christmas-christian-redux.html
That is not my main concern here, though. My biggest concern is that perhaps we haven’t considered the fact that we may be being ungrateful. Could it be that since we and our children get many of the things we want during the year anyway, Christmas is naturally seen as a time of excess? Perhaps if we said “no” a bit more during the year, we would truly appreciate both the gifts we give and receive. If we know this is one of the few times of the year to give gifts, perhaps we would be even more thoughtful as to what we give people. Could it be we are rather spoiled as a nation? Why do we complain when our families want to shower us with gifts? Even if they don’t understand the true meaning of Christmas, could we not be more thankful that they–by God’s common grace–are trying to show their love and care for us? Even if we don’t like what they send, we could teach our children thankfulness by saying, “Wow, kids! Even though we may not think that all these gifts are necessary, it sure means a lot to us that Grandma and Grandpa would go through all this work to try to show their love for us!” The Bible says that love bears all things–we should bear with our relatives who are simply trying–even if it isn’t perfect–to show us love.
In regards to serving others instead of giving gifts–why can’t we do both? And why does Christmas have to be the only time of year that we think of serving and giving to charities? Your local charity’s ledger probably wishes more people thought of this in July than only December. =)
There is great reason to give and receive thoughtful, caring gifts given in love during this season. Rejoice over the greatest gift–Jesus! Rejoice when you have the means to give your children a special gift they will delight in! (And perhaps teach them some self-denial the rest of the year.) Rejoice when you get to serve and minister to the unloved and broken-hearted ALL year! Rejoice that you live in a country where most of us have the liberty to celebrate with gifts or without! Many people around the world don’t have that option, but don’t feel guilty–be THANKFUL! A thankful heart does wonders to dispel guilt, worry, fear, anxiety, and greed.
Merry Christmas!
*like*
This is terrific. My husband and I used to go to Jeff Meyers church and I am really thankful for this helpful posts on the subject. Thanks for posting it here and for your other great words! Merry Christmas!
Where does it say the angels were singing? I would have felt the same way before we attended a Messianic church for 7 years. I do not think Santa is Satan-just that the spelling is interesting. I do prefer the King James Bible that uses the word-devil- which has evil in it so it is self-defining. I don’t like the word-demon- that is in the modern versions. Oprah thinks there are friendly demons. Sorry ladies, but I notice spelling,etc. I understand those people that say they believe the devil is the inventor/promoter of Santa Claus. I still remember thinking as a child- if Santa is not real maybe they lied to me about God, too. I won’t lie to my children and grandchildren. We are such a tv culture- I suggest that if we didn’t have tv’s maybe we would think differently. Neil Postman’s book- Amusing Ourselves to Death is great. Many have a tv Christianity as well. So do you also celebrate Halloween and Easter? My Baptist church must be strange to you then as many churches don’t celebrate those. -Respectfully
Does it really matter if they were “singing” or “saying”…”Glory to God in the Highest”? The point that was made is that they were celbrating the Christ-child’s birth.
Kelly.. you know if you had posted this last year, I would have responded in one way. I was pretty sure I knew what the Lord wanted from me, how He wanted me and mine to celebrate His birth. But this year events have transpired to make me rethink my previous thoughts. I think He wants us to be joyful. I think He wants us to be overwhelmed with joy at His coming and gratitude for what He has done in our lives… so overwhelmed that it overflows every which way. And yeah, I think that means gifts and Christmas trees and carols and hot chocolate (I’ll take mine with a shot of peppermint please ;-}) The lavishness of it all speaks to us of the lavishness of God. And as long as He is at the center of it all… and I do mean truly at the center… I think it’s all good.
Warning…. shameless self promotion ahead…
I posted about these recent events and how they have caused my own rethinking today at my blog. http://tomatosoupcake.blogspot.com/2010/12/unexpected.html
That’s beautiful, Diane. I could not agree more 🙂
*practically perfect in every way* 🙂
Kelly, our friends are mad at us for even asking questions. We believe that this is something each family must work out for themselves. Whenever we even raise questions, our friends jump all over us, mad. Just this week, my husband asked on Facebook why everyone was talking about “putting Christ back in Christmas” when He was never in Christmas in the first place. Originally, “Christmas” was a pagan festival, and is STILL celebrated as a pagan festival today by many. I find it interesting that I know of some pagans that are confused as to why Christians would celebrate Christmas since “everyone knows” that it’s a pagan festival. That’s one thing that bothers me. Us Christians are being a stumbling block to pagans, and satanists, and others. Is it really worth doing something we like (celebrating Christmas) if it is going to cause others to never want to be a Christian because they know what is truly going on?
And people have told us that it doesn’t matter WHEN Jesus was born, we can just pick a day to celebrate. Well, Jesus was sinless, and if He was going to choose a day for His birthday to be celebrated, it certainly would NOT be the same week as a pagan festival. Jesus just isn’t like that. I also find it interesting that we are never told in the Bible to celebrate Christ’s birth, only to remember his death, and to celebrate and think about His resurrection.
We are celebrating this year, but we are also asking hard questions. And it seems that in this day and age, everyone expects you to conform to their preconceived beliefs rather than ask hard questions. Because if you ask hard questions, you might get hard answers you don’t like, and then you may have to believe those answers, and in believing those answers, have to act on them. And for many, Christmas is an idol. I say that because many, even if they were to find out for themselves that it was wrong, would still not give it up because they love it so much. And that’s a problem.
Thanks for bringing these issues up Kelly. I sense some changes for us, like that God might end up leading us not to celebrate. In a way that makes me sad, but I’m committed to radical living for Jesus, and if He asks us not to, then we won’t, no matter who does or doesn’t like it.
“Is it really worth doing something we like (celebrating Christmas) if it is going to cause others to never want to be a Christian because they know what is truly going on?”
What’s really going on is that true Christians are celebrating their Savior’s birth. What the devil is this fearfulness about?? Just unbelievable.
Mrs W, your wrote: “We are celebrating this year, but we are also asking hard questions. And it seems that in this day and age, everyone expects you to conform to their preconceived beliefs rather than ask hard questions. Because if you ask hard questions, you might get hard answers you don’t like, and then you may have to believe those answers, and in believing those answers, have to act on them.”
I am a firm advocate for asking hard questions, not just about Christmas but about all aspects of life and faith. Searching out the answers to those questions is how I came to my choice to remain separated and not divorce my husband. And how I became convicted to cover my head full time. Often the answers are hard… so hard that we can only fulfill them by the enabling grace of God. But just because the question is hard doesn’t necessarily mean that the answer will be as well. Sometimes the answers are soft. Sometimes the answer allows us to take an easy path. That’s what grace means♥
Mrs W, for some pagans, every day has something special about it and if not a festival, a ritual associated with it.
I like what you said about asking the hard questions, and as Diane said, I believe we should do that in all areas of our lives. Often times the answer that God gives you means that you will be living quite different from others, at least that is what we have found most of the time, but we have peace about those decisions/answers, knowing that we are following Him by living them out. 🙂
[…] the last post dealt with a fresh look at gift-giving, and many opt to do away with gifts altogether, giving gifts […]
Has anyone seen Ben Stein’s great documentary- Expelled. It is about how there is no room for discussion in the world of science and how many scientists who have faith are fired. He goes to the Berlin Wall,etc. I humbly suggest some things like knowing what the Bible really says. It is ironic that people reject the God/man Jesus but accept the baby like many in my family- who are pro-abortion. Oh-I don’t celebrate July 4th either. I tell my children I will reconsider when abortion is abolished. I remember when abortion became legal- my children were born into a world where it was legal. Hey- I think that’s another reason to not celebrate Christmas. Just thought of that while I was typing. We can make a difference. PTL.
“It is ironic that people reject the God/man Jesus but accept the baby like many in my family- who are pro-abortion. Oh-I don’t celebrate July 4th either. I tell my children I will reconsider when abortion is abolished. I remember when abortion became legal- my children were born into a world where it was legal. Hey- I think that’s another reason to not celebrate Christmas”
I have no idea what you just said, but saw something in there about refusing Christmas and the birth of our country because of abortion. The lengths some people will go to..
My mother who was being generous as some say came into my house and put a made in China poster of Santa on my front door and refrigerator didn’t understand when I humbly asked her to remove them. She is also the only one who ever brought alcohol into our house. Her house has the most made-in-China decorations inside and out in front of her house for Halloween,etc. I think she is still mad at me for leaving the Roman Catholic church. She also bought a nativity set for us when she heard we didn’t like statues. Jesus said he came to bring a sword(division)-Matthew 10:34(KJB)- He said he didn’t come to bring peace- in that verse. I am a Bible Christian- verse 35 and 36 are interesting, too.
Mass does not mean death. And Christmas does not meant Christ’s death. Mass actually originates from a word for dismissal. The thought is that when catechumens were asked to depart before the celebration of the eucharist (because only people who had actually joined the church and were baptized were allowed to receive communion) that the word was used.
Merry Christmas, by definition means: “merry death of Christ”. The World Book Encyclopedia defines “Christmas” as follows: “The word Christmas comes from “Cristes Maesse”, an early English phrase that means “Mass of Christ.” It is interesting to note that the word Mass is strictly a Catholic word, in religious usage it means a “death sacrifice.” Page 537 of the Catholic Encyclopedia, which says, “In the Christian **read Catholic** law, the supreme sacrifice is that of the Mass.”…”The supreme act of worship consists essentially in an offering of a worthy victim to God, the offering made by a proper person, as a priest, and the destruction of the victim.” The Latin word for victim is “Hostia” from which we get the Catholic communion word “host”. The Catholic definition is: a sacrifice involving a victim. There is no other meaning for the word “Mass” or “Christ-Mass.”
Once you’ve given your life to Christ, I don’t think it’s going to matter how you celebrate and decorate or if you celebrate at all, as long as you keep Him as your focus and desire to do His Will on remembrance of His birth into the world (and every other day of the year). What a wonderful opportunity the share the Gospel, through words and action!
We decorate with a tree and nativity, but we don’t worship them. They are decorations to commemorate the birth of Christ, nothing more. They are not our “idols”.
I’m posting a wise quote from a former pastor(I know he won’t mind) because it sums up what I wanted to say:
“Just whose birthday is it anyway? If it is Jesus Christ’s, why is He not the one who receives the gifts? How is it that what is celebrated as the birth of the man in whom dwelt bodily the fullness of the essence of God has degenerated into the materialistic orgy of self-indulgence?
If there was one thing true of the Son of Man Who was also the Son of God, it is that there was not one speck of self-indulgence in Him at all. How is it then that the celebration of His coming stinks with an almost overwhelming odor of selfishness?
The answer is found in the manipulative skill of the arch-adversary of God and men. It has ever been the plot of this one to take that which is good, just, holy, and loving, and turn it inward. And unfortunately, he has not skipped over the world’s celebration of the birth of the Savior. What God designed to be a vehicle for fantastic blessing, Satan attempts to twist into a curse–and men become the heirs of their doings. Those who believe Him find the return of the Christmas season a blessing because it turns their minds to His awesome integrity by reason of the fulfillment of His promises to those who believe. Those who are living for someone other than their Faithful Creator find the return of Christmas just another one of those illusions of joy that turns out to be more of a strain and pain than the effort warrants.
How can those of us who love Him celebrate His coming in a way that is pleasing to Him? What gift can we give Him that is as suitable to Him as the original gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh? The answer is as simple, and as complex, as His statement that “Whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me” (Mark 8: 34; KJV). In other words, there is no gift which He desires greater than the gift of ourselves. “Lord I give myself to You to be in Your hands for anything that You wish”.
Does this mean that we must withdraw from the hustle and bustle of the world’s celebration? For some, yes–because that very hustle and bustle is their way to escape the nagging question of just who is the Lord of life. For others, no–because they know who is Lord in their lives and He has given them instruction to “buy up the opportunities” to spread the sweet odor of His truth among the wretched of this world. Those who must withdraw must do so because He wants them for His gift–not their doings. And they dare not let the pressure of outside things (buying and selling, hurrying and scurrying, cooking and baking, etc.) turn them aside from the imperative to reject the pressure and sit down quietly before Him in complete resignation to His good, and acceptable, and perfect will (Romans 12:1-2). For those who have already done this, the task is to make every purchase, every sale, every cookie baked, every gift given, every gift received–in short, every moment breathed–a demonstration of His Spirit, Who seeks by His doings to bring blessing into the lives which He touches.”
I think an exegetical study of the difference between Old Testament Biblical fear and the (often overly) emotional frightfulness that seems to surround these topics, particularly where we women are involved, might be helpful. (WW, between barfing babies are you up for that? – praying HARD for you over here). There’s clear Biblical mandate to eschew falsehoods of all kinds, including the unsolvable puzzle of Pharisaical logic, by which none of us should eat apples or grow gardens. I mean, there might be snakes!?! 😉
Idolatry abounds, yes – ironically, most often among professing Christians – women I think suffer with the false idols of piety and safety, largely because proper understanding of the masculine character of God has been left out of our Churches (another conversation, and our very feminine natures are to pick up slack – a good thing, as far as it goes, but also extremely counterproductive when exaggerated).
Christ celebrated in his human life, kept feasts, went to weddings, among friends, even dared mingle with the riff raff. He was hardly Puritanical (by our denominational standards), dropped more than one legalistic pest with a one line zinger, and promised he would be back to sort out the rest. My belief in that singular promise insists on a hearty reverence and seriousness, no doubt. He was a lot of things, grieved, aggravated, perhaps anxious, even, by the appearance of some passages, but he was NEVER afraid. That’s the example that’s missing, frankly, in this discussion. I’m to be less frightened of the things of this Earth, because I have proper perspective in fear of the Lord. Lucifer is not going to pop out from behind my Christmas tree or drop down from the garland on my porch and drag me to Hell. He might, however, hover close when I’m so certain I’ve perfectly compartmentalized him for my own convenience. It’s easy to confuse one superstitious notion with another, rather than getting to the actual heart of the truth, when our objective is to merely trump one another with how holy we are. It’s an HONOR to celebrate the birth of our Savior, accurate date notwithstanding, (because – again – it’s not the point) – among family, among friends, and among those who might not yet know his Saving Grace, or who do, but need reminding of it. I hope those are the lessons my children learn from the Advent and Christmas seasons. I pray we’ll practice them all year long.
I do not refuse the birth of our country- I homeschool(1985-2011) and use Abeka’s patriotic curriculum to teach about the birth of our country. I think it is honoring to our country that Harriet Beecher Stowe wrote Uncle Tom’s Cabin. Her novel is lengthy. I cannot write a novel but I can do something. Stowe’s play was performed all over our country and Abraham Lincoln said it influenced him. Slavery was abolished -maybe we can get abortion abolished. My Catholic family is pro-abortion but they don’t think it is ironic like I do that they don’t read Jesus’ words in the Bible but celebrate the baby Jesus. I guess many don’t see the irony. I was taught in the 1960s that mass meant death in Catholic school. I celebrate Thanksgiving. I did not want to be like the Jehovahs Witnesses and not celebrate Christmas so I prayed when Jewish believers explained it to me.
I would like to say also that we are not perfect. I would like to be 100% selfless. I wish I could eat like a monk and pray like a monk, but I can’t. I can only hope that as I grow closer to my savior, that I will be come more and more like Him. Where I am not like Him, there is forgiveness. But even more than that, he created us to be who we are… not clones, but individuals! He’s creative and we’re all different. Taryn is called to a more austere way of life rooted in a deep sense of justice. I admire her willpower, I could never be like that. Asceticism is a difficult path. I believe I am called to bring joy to my family, a little spark of heaven. I want it to mean something to be in my family. All 3 of my kids have special needs, one is adopted. Life is hard. Sometimes it is hard to remain strong and true when your autistic son is literally punching himself in the face and screaming. That is hard on my other kids. I give them what I can… from video games, to trips to Disney, to sending cards to our sponsor kids, to making craft kits for the childrens’ hospital… but for me Christmas is that little stand of joy and hope in the middle of a sometimes dark and lonely world. It’s like a song I once heard, “Sing songs. Spite the devil.” That’s what it is. Do not lose hope. Do not give up. Keep going… the Savior has come and in Him is the embodiment of all hope, all peace, all goodness, all love. I love it and celebrate it as a feast day. I wish we as Christians could be more unified from those who use the regulative principle, to those who are Catholic, from those who sing contemporary songs, to those who are Orthodox. From those who homeschool to those who do not. To come together and acknowledge that in Christ is the resurrection and life… not in our practices… but in our hearts and in our whole lives. Peace.
Holly, I think you’re right; we are different and do have different callings. I think Taryn is following her right path.
I asked about the word “singing” because I was doing a word search in my Strong’s Concordance book. I was sincerely interested. Then I looked up the word-“saying”- I enjoy using Strong’s. Many Messianic believers call the Christmas tree- the Jeremiah tree-Jeremiah 10:2,3,4,-“Learn not the way of the heathen…” -Humbly
Taryn, I by no means want to dispute your personal convictions, but I must say that the passage in Jeremiah does NOT refer to a Christmas tree. Jeremiah was speaking to God’s people about the danger of worshiping the wooden (carved from a tree) idol gods of the “heathens” that lived among them. These people carved and adorned images of their gods and worshiped them. People would bow before these images, pray to them, offer sacrifices to them, and carry them around. God specificlly told us to not make a graven image of him to worship. Since I do not worship at the foot of my Christmas tree, pray to it, or offer sacrifices to it so that it will “bless” me, this warning in Jeremiah has no bearing on my using a Christmas tree as a decoration.
I’ve been reading these comments over the past day and have really enjoyed hearing about everyone’s varying views of Christmas and how they have chosen to celebrate this season. I would like to also comment on our family’s Christmas traditions.
First, we focus on using this time of year to celebrate Christ’s birth. Simple. We decorate our home with nativity and garland, trees and light. We read from Luke the story of Christ’s birth (in the KJV because of it’s poetic rhythm) on Christmas Eve, snuggled around our fireplace in our Christmas pjs. We then pray.
Second, we give gifts to our children, some from Santa, some from mommy and daddy. We don’t emphasis Santa in our home (like telling our children to behave because Santa is watching). We tell our children that Santa is a man who loves to give to all children because he simply loves others. They only get their stockings filled by Santa and get one modest gift from him. We spend very little on gifts for them, but they only get gifts on their birthdays and at Christmas. We are not running out buying them the latest toy, game, etc. every month because everyone else has it. This is how my husband and I were raised and this is something we want to continue.
Third, we focus on family and friends (our family in Christ). We use this time to get together with family and open our home in hospitality. This year we are hosting my family Christmas (50 people or so) on Christmas Day. We are hosting three other Christmas celebrations. My parents and one of my sisters and her husband will be staying a few days with us during the holidays.
Fourth, we give homemade gifts to everyone else. I make homemade chocolate chip cookies for just about everyone. I made over 50 dozen last year. This is inexpensive and people start asking about them in October (Are you making cookies this year?)! Also, we give a gift to our childrens’ grandparents and great grandparents. This is usually a picture of the children, but this year it’s a small album with pics from the last year. My grandmother also receives a large gift from us in the form of a gift card. She is a widow and on a fixed and small income. Everyone in our family gives her gift cards for Christmas to assist with her monthly expenses. These can be used for clothing, prescriptions, food, household items, etc. Last year, she received over $2000 in gift cards. We see this as taking care of her in a way that is pleasing to God. We also do Christmas cards with a family picture. We have tons of extended family that we rarely see and this is an easy way to send a pic.
Fifth, we serve and give to others. Our church focuses a lot on serving throughout the year. We have quarterly service projects that are sponsored and organized by our church. We use our midweek service to work on these projects in teams. This quarter we are doing several projects – feeding our local police/firefighters/911, providing 265 pairs of shoes & socks to county children in need of a good pair of shoes this winter, gift boxes for troops deployed overseas, and gifts for elderly in nursing homes. Many of these things are done “secretly” not as a promotion of our church. In other words, the shoes are for children are just given “by an area church.”
As a family we also do shoeboxes – one for each pair of shoes that we purchased for ourselves throughout the year. (We only did 5 this year, seeing that I, nor my hubby got any new shoes this past year!) We had a yard sale recently and gave the money to our mission team that is going to the Philippians in January. Our leadership team at our church (which includes my husband as worship pastor) is buying animals for families through Samaritan’s purse. We also gave a gift to St. Jude. Our church has a team of runners who will be running for a child in our church this Saturday.
I hesitated a bit about sharing some of the things we do, because I don’t want to come across as boasting. I really just want to provide examples of ways to serve others. But we strive to serve our family (like my grandmother who is in need), our church (we at times have true needs in our church family), our community, and the world. We are blessed to have a church that encourages and provides opportunities to serve others. And they do this year-round! We will have new projects for January through March, and then new projects in April, etc. We have been so blessed by this. We strive to give sacrificially of not only our money but also our time, doing without perceived “needs” (new shoes for mommy and daddy) so that we can give to others. There are needs everywhere, if we just look.
I think if our intentions are to celebrate Christmas in a balanced and reverent way, God will be pleased with our humble efforts and multiply their impact.
Matthew 5:14-16 Illuminate the world
Thank you Holly for your kindness(Ephesians 4:32-KJB). I don’t think I am ascetic. I don’t like any type of clutter. I, too, have a beautiful daughter, Jessica,(28) with autism spectrum. She recently moved into a group home(a 6-year waiting list). They literally rolled their eyes when we told them we don’t celebrate Halloween- then I gave them the other restrictions- dietary,etc. We also have 4 sons and a daughter,Angela,(20)(with Type 1 diabetes who was diagnosed at 5 years old). We have “the joy of the Lord is your strength”(Nehemiah 8:10b-KJB) but I also have the book- Disney and the Bible(1996). Everyone is off of work at Christmas so we have a turkey dinner(our daughter visits). With 3 married sons and 4 baby granddaughters there is much laughter- on a daily basis at our large table and in our home.
As you ponder consider the following:
In 325 A.D Constantine, the Roman emperor (who was NOT a Christian) officiated the 25th of December as the birth of Christ. But it was not recognized universally due to its non-christian origin.
Christmas was known as a drunken riotous time, in Europe celebrations eventually became so rowdy that when Oliver Cromwell took over England in 1643, Christmas was cancelled. When Charles II was restored to the throne, with him, came the return of Christmas in 1660.
The pilgrims, that came to America in 1620, were even more orthodox in their beliefs than Cromwell. As a result, Christmas was not a holiday in early America. After the Mayflower pilgrims landed in 1620, the first December 25th was spent in labor and cutting down trees “in order to avoid any frivolity on the day sometimes called Christmas.”
From 1659 to 1681, the celebration of Christmas was actually outlawed in Boston.
Newcomers and their traditions came and Christmas was on the scene until after the American Revolution. At that time English customs fell out of favor, including Christmas. In fact, Congress was in session on December 25, 1789, the first Christmas under America’s new constitution.
In 1828, the New York city council instituted the city’s first police force in response to a Christmas riot. This catalyzed certain members of the upper classes to begin to change the way Christmas was celebrated in America.
In 1834 Queen Victoria and her German husband Prince Albert endorsed the celebration of Christmas adding to it’s popularity.
The North and South were divided on the issue of Christmas, as well as on the question of slavery. Many Northerners saw sin in the celebration of Christmas; to these people the celebration of Thanksgiving was more appropriate. But in the South, Christmas was an important part of the social season. Not surprisingly, the first three states to make Christmas a legal holiday were in the South: Alabama in 1836, Louisiana and Arkansas in 1838.
Opposition to the observance of Christmas in the US continued just past the second half of the Nineteenth Century. An article in the December 26, 1855 edition of the New York Daily Times stated,
“The churches of the Presbyterians, Baptists and Methodists were not open on December 25 except where some mission schools had a celebration. They do not accept the day as a holy one, but the Episcopalian, Catholic and German churches were all open. Inside they were decked with evergreens.”
Christmas wasn’t declared a federal holiday until June 26, 1870.
Henry Ward Beecher, wrote in 1874 of his New England boyhood:
“To me Christmas is a foreign day, and I shall die so. When I was a boy I wondered what Christmas was. I knew there was such a time, because we had an Episcopal church in our town, and I saw them dressing it with evergreens, and wondered what they were taking the woods in the church for; but I got no satisfactory explanation. A little later I understood it was a Romish institution, kept by the Romish Church.”
We also don’t do a nativity scene at Christmas and people feel that they ought to be personally offended by that. But we take literally in the ten commandments where it says to have no images of God. A statue, doll, picture in a book etc are all images, and therefore prohibited. So no nativity for us. Something else to think about, if you want to go there lol.
Lots of interesting discussions here, though admittedly, I haven’t read them all. (Today’s MY turn with the bug that’s making its round through our house, though it manifests itself in a different form in my body (thank goodness–no buckets for me, just a flu-like feeling.)
As a personal note about holidays, we (of a reformed flavor) seek to “redeem” days for the Lord instead of shun them. We celebrate “Reformation Day” for example, during Halloween, to commemorate All Saints Day.
This excerpt from an article by Eric Rauch has a simple explanation of one way to look at this “pagan redemption”:
“If Christianity was never meant to supplant paganism in this world, why would God have commanded the Israelites to take the promised land from the Canaanites? After all, they were there first weren’t they? If God was so concerned about His people getting tainted by the paganism of the Canaanites, why didn’t He give the Israelites a different piece of land, seeing as how the Promised Land was now covered with pagans? Just as He had humiliated the “gods” of the Egyptians and their human Pharaoh 40 years earlier, God was now revealing to His people that His method of operation is one of dividing and conquering. God made the calendar, just as surely as He made the earth. Christians should not rest until every day of the week is focused on Him and His glory, and not a single day remains that is dedicated to a pagan deity. “We will take every single day from any god that claims any ownership; and whatever we decide to make a global “holiday,” will be a global Holy Day.” [2] I find it quite ironic that the same Christians who refuse to acknowledge Christmas, which is at least based on a biblical event, make no such fuss over Thanksgiving, a holiday that has no biblical warrant whatsoever and is based strictly on historical tradition. They also seem to miss the fact that all Christians corporately worship the biblical God on either Sunday (the day of the Sun god), or for others, on Saturday (Saturn’s day). This element of vestigial paganism is conveniently overlooked.”
The Pagan Roots of Christmas
Very good quote Kelly!
Awesome point! How can we give an day to the enemy when the Bible says “This is the day that the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it!” ?
Thanksgiving is based on a biblical holy day the feast of Sukkot. I forget which president changed the date so that it would not be tied to a “jewish” holy day.
Christmas how ever is not “based” on anything biblical but is a thin vale of christian thrown over a pagan holy day.
I do agree we should seek to make every day Glorify the one true G-D, but that does not mean we use pagan traditions. The Israelite were told over and over not to worship the one true G-d in the ways the pagans did.
Choose this day whom you will worship.
Katie Grace- I am just repeating what I learned at the church we went to for 7 years that my Jewish-believer friend invited me to.- I appreciate that Christian Liberty Press(Reformed Theology) has 3 books-first grade-that don’t have any pictures of Jesus-as they advertise. Our Conservative Baptist church and us celebrate Reformation Day-Oct 31.
I learned a lot at the Messianic church but I prefer to call Jesus -Jesus- and I researched that. I understand why they don’t have a Christmas tree, don’t eat pork,etc.(I have Jordan Rubin’s books),etc. I don’t think it’s ironic that they and others celebrate Thanksgiving and not Christmas. My Jewish-believer friend preferred Jesus over Yeshua. And I am not saying that there aren’t Jewish believers that celebrate Christmas and have a tree but many don’t. That experience affected our family. I remember a discussion in a church we went to years ago-should the Christmas tree go in the foyer or in the sanctuary. Many didn’t want it at all. It ended up in the foyer.
This is new for us, but we have already celebrated the birth of Jesus this year. Just not during the traditional time of Christmas or in keeping with time-honored traditions of Christmas.
We have really been taking “sola scriptura” to heart and examining our own personal motivations, ideas, preferences in how we live and worship. We’re just simple people wanting to live as Christ. We wondered throughout the course of this year, “What would it look like if we ‘wiped the slate clean’ and just began with the Word and the life Jesus lived?”
I’m not peckin’ for a smackdown on old v. new covenant and all that, but just wanted to share… 🙂
I think it is possible that God joyfully gave us provision and instruction on celebrating the birth of His Son. Many historians and scriptural scholars believe that Jesus was born in the fall during The Feast of Tabernacles…a commanded week long feast of joy and celebration and worship. It is discussed in Deuteronomy and Exodus…and throughout the scriptures.
This feast is one of the most joyous times throughout the history of the Hebrews in remembering how God brought them out of Egypt, how He dwelt with them, and was a foreshadowing of the Savior coming to tabernacle with us! How beautiful that God would send His only son to be born at this time, if this is in fact, true! John 1:14 “And the Word was made flesh and dwelt among us…” Other translations have “did tabernacle among us.”
Jesus did celebrate this, and so, we chose to celebrate this. And it was a FUN, exciting, and meaningful time for our family…and we got to do it for a whole week!!! Our children (7,5,4,2 and one almost here!) loved it, and for me, so much more than filled that need to celebrate on December 25 in the manner of what our traditional Christmas dictates. Just to note, as this season’s festivities are upon us, we don’t balk at our friends and families celebrating Christmas.
And it just so happens that Hanukkah occurs around Christmas time. Though not scripturally mandated, Jesus did observe it. There are Talmudic man-made traditions/myths and the recent odd Christmas-infused traditions surrounding it, which we are avoiding… just focusing on the bare bones of it. There are scriptural scholars who also believe this was about the time of conception of Jesus. Lots of foreshadowing here too. We will celebrate this, in a modest, fun, and spiritually reflective way.
So… that’s what our family is doing. 🙂
Isn’t Hanukkah- the Talmud/Kaballah(sp?)? I know John 10:22- but if I read Matthew 15:3,6(“tradition”) and Mark 7:8,9,13 which talks about Jewish tradition-the Talmud- I have a difficult time believing that Jesus celebrated a Talmudic tradition. I can’t teach my children that. My sister is a converted Jewish Kaballist and it would please her if I believed that our Lord celebrated Hanukkah. The Scripture simply states that he was in Jerusalem at that time of year. I could be wrong.
You’re right about the Talmud, Taryn. It promoted numerous things Christ opposed.
Katie Grace-“…Learn not the way of the heathen…for one cutteth a tree out of the forest,…They deck it with silver and gold: they fasten it with nails and with hammers, that it move not. …”(KJB-Jeremiah 10:2-5) Anyone read Zechariah 2:6-“Ho,ho,…from the land of the north…”(KJB) I don’t know what the new versions(why did they change “Diana”-KJB- to “Artemis” in Acts 19)say. But I do understand why many say Jeremiah 10 is the Christmas tree and how that many say Santa is the invention of the devil.
When I was 16 my mother discovered I threw out the Mary statues that were in my room. She took them out of the garbage. I explained to her that I was going to go to the Baptist church-walk there. I was the only member of our family that had walked to the Catholic church on Sundays. I went to a government high school in 12th grade(1972-3) and carried a King James Bible on top of my books. Eventually a Mary statue was in our home while we were raising our children- my mother bought us a Nativity set. Then one day I realized what had happened- so we don’t have manger scene statues anymore. My sister took me to a place on Long Island with a tall Mary statue and other statues(saints,etc.)- the atmosphere felt scary. I am so happy to be a Bible Christian. I hope others understand. I just watched a tv movie about a wood-carved Nativity but I just can’t go back to statues in my house. A Lutheran friend of mine was upset because the Catholic Charities group home her son(44) was in had a statue of Mary out front. She called it an idol. But she has a Nativity set inside and outside for Christmas.
I don’t approve of many Catholic practices, but neither do I think statues are idolatrous. You do what you feel is right though, Taryn.
Nativity scenes are just sweet: my toddler niece saw a big one the other day at a store and crept around the shepherds, peeked into Mary’s bent face and piped “Hi!”, then cradled the Baby Jesus and tried twice to carry him out! LOL
I thought about this a lot last year and found some really helpful thoughts posted by others. You can read the compilation of those at:
http://habitsforahappyhome.wordpress.com/2010/12/06/christmas-generosity-guest-post-by-brandy-sexton-2/
Just to sum up a few points…Christmas is something to celebrate in grand style. It is the most wonderful even in history (along with Easter of course)! God does not bind our conscience about feasting, but instead tells us to invite the poor and lonely to the celebration! We are to receive all of his good gifts to us and enjoy them with thanksgiving. There is a time to simplify, cut back, and scale down. But I submit that there is the rest of the year for that. Christmas (seems to me) the time to roll up our sleaves and work at letting the world see how we can celebrate God in the flesh. And not only the world, but God himself. And in this celebration we can find the hurting and lonely among us and invite them to our feast.
wow, alot of these comments seem to come from the Grinch himself 😉
Thanks for your comment Brandy, i love it!
We don’t do Santa. Mainly because I refuse to let my kids think that a stranger bought them presents instead of their hard working dad lol. So we tell them Santa is just a story, and a fun game we like to play around christmas.
We give gifts to everyone in my family, and I really don’t mind the pressure. I shop ahead of time and I pay attention to all the little things my family says they like through the year. Like my mother-in-law and I were listening to a particular song in the car and she said “oh I just love him, and I have a record of his but not a cd that I can play” So guess what she is getting for christmas 🙂
I love giving gifts to my family, and I don’t care if they already have an abundance of stuff. I want them to know that I listen to them and know their passions and likes.
This year my husband and I are making the girls toys. We made a matching game and a train table, a knew handmade doll. apron, and a blanket.
And we always have a christmas tree, two in fact. And my girls love to make the decorations for it.
We try hard to celebrate the whole christmas season, and not just focus on one day of gift giving. We are having a cookie baking party this thursday, and the other day the whole family got together to make ornaments and wreaths for our homes.
I think a lot of people get all worked up about christmas because they don’t have any money and have to charge everything. But really there is no need for that. Christmas comes the same day every year so we can plan out our finances 11 months ahead of time.
A “legal” loophole is not illegal.