Motherhood, Fear & Resolving to Fight

I have had to read my own eBook lately, which I think is sort of funny, but it proves that so often what we know to be true is not as easy to live out as to talk about. I have found that THE SECRET, in almost any area of life where improvement is desired, is simply staying reminded.

That’s why we devour article after article on saving money, being a better wife and mother, “how-tos” of all genres, though most of what we read isn’t new; it’s just inspiring–and it reminds us how to live.

As a mother desperately fighting for my children in a culture that is largely against them, I. need. reminded. Today God used a dear friend to remind.

Since last year’s storm, I have battled a number of emotions, the greatest of which is fear. I didn’t know how much so until last week, when storms and tornadoes ripped through our area again. Our family, along with two of the same families that endured the tornado with us in 2011, met again, in the same room in the basement of the house we are rebuilding, to wait out the storms.

I didn’t know how anxious I would be. And I certainly wasn’t prepared for what was coming.

As the storm approached, with all of us downstairs, the men ran up to secure our doors, not yet sealed. Because there are absolutely no trees anywhere around us now (the storm took them all for miles), it can be violently windy in the slightest weather.

But this storm brought 60 mph winds, exacerbated by the barren land. As we waited anxiously downstairs, we suddenly heard crashes from above, and then all the men running–literally–down the stairs. At the very same time the violent wind pushed through the only opening in the house–the doors–making a fierce, whistling sound I had forgotten until I heard it again. It was the same sound we heard just before the tornado took our house last year. The. same. sound. Running men. Crashing sounds. And for a brief moment, I…we all thought we were being hit again.

There are no words for the fear I felt, or that of my children. Hearts raced for hours, headaches pounded from the adrenaline, and the night held us in constant alarm as storms continued until morning.

But my friend…she spoke what was true. She reminded. I am a mother ushering children into this great big life, teaching them how to respond, how to love, how to trust, and how to know God. Despite my fears, I am obligated to point them to the one Who holds the storm in His hand.

I have to push through, conquer, immerse myself in the Word and fight, until at last, my heart is at peace with the God who gives and the God who takes away.

Thank you, Robin.

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