“And it occurred to me…she may not be learning a heap, but she is being infused with the comfort, familiarity and desire to make something with her hands that will be a blessing to others.”
Every mother can attest to the frustration that can come when your little ones want to help you cook. I know I can! Forget the neat, organized method I had in mind; instead, I prepare for broken eggs on the floor 😉
Yesterday I thought about an important aspect of this seemingly simply activity.
How many women have you heard express their disdain for the kitchen? (I have friends who literally “don’t cook”–ever.) I would be willing to bet they didn’t start out hating it as little girls; I’ve never known a small child who didn’t love to have his or her hands in the mixing bowl.
Once a normal, expected role of a wife and mother is now all but extinct. Preparing delicious meals for the ones we love was once esteemed an art, and at the least, an act of loving devotion; now it is viewed as a menial chore.
As my three helped make dumplings last night, once again I had to suppress irritation and just let them experiment. Mallie looked on with the greatest interest. And it occurred to me…she may not be learning a heap, but she is being infused with the comfort, familiarity and desire to make something with her hands that will be a blessing to others.
Allowing our children to work beside us–in any area–gives them confidence that will naturally extend into their grown lives, enriching their world and that of those around them.
16 comments
What little darlings!
My little Ryan can usually be found dipping his army men in the other side of the sink while I am washing dishes. It makes it harder for me to rinse them, but who can resist “I want to do dishes whish-yoo Mommy”.
Even though I know it won’t make it easier for me, I usually let him. I can’t resist the smile and I perhaps he will at least remember it fondly when he grows up.
They are so cute! I wanted to say thanks for being open and honest about it being frustrating to let them help you. I agree at the same time it is a good thing to let them learn along side you.
Sometimes I have to remind myself that I should always say “yes!” when they want to help, because if I continually shoo them out of the kitchen, there will come a time when they will stop asking. The opportunity will be lost.
Love it! So true!
I have always let my girls have free reign in the kitchen, even though it comes with many frustrations, I am reaping the benefits of it now that they are 14 and 18; I usually have to remind them that it is MY kitchen too!
Women not cooking is all part of the break down of the family. Who is home to let them learn along side them? Who wants to take the time to deal with the mess?
Let us be diligent to reclaim our homes and our holy duty in the kitchen. This is one way we minister to feeding the hungry.
So how did the dumplings turn out? It is perfect weather for it!
Kathy,
I’m SO glad you reminded me…I meant to email you and say that your recipe was fabulous! I have never made good dumplings and these were the best!
My dear husband said, “Wow, these taste just like my grandmother’s”…and that is a compliment of the universe!
Thanks so much for the recipe!
(BTW…Kathy has a great ebook about “What to do when your daughter hates being in the kitchen”)
“Taste like Grandma’s”, is there a higher complement? :o)
Well said. I have a hard time allowing my girls to help in the kitchen especially when I am tired and not looking forward to the mess I KNOW they will make.
But as I have been giving in to their pleas (and please) to help in the kitchen, I am finding them to be eager to help, quick learners, and good at cleaning up after themselves. 🙂
Thank you for the encouragement to keep on keeping on in the kitchen.
So true. I am sure many of those who don’t cook, don’t have happy memories in the kitchen with their mother. I have found myself shooing them out at times. Then I think of how important it is for them to be right beside me, no matter how much clean up I have in the end. 🙂
I just ran across your blog. It was such a funny coincidence, as yesterday, I decided to let my 3 year old help me cook for the first time. It was a big mess, but we had sooo much fun. As soon as he was awake this morning, he was on his little stool in the kitchen to “hep (help) mama, hep”
I usually do not like to cook. I was not taught to cook at home.
My grandmother, who raised me, would shoo me out of the kitchen, saying, “I can do it faster myself.” She was an impatient person, but I don’t want to say she was a bad person. She was old, and it was not fair to her that she had to raise her grandchildren. She hated to cook, and would always mention it, in her Irish brogue, “Sure, I HATE the cookin’.”
That, plus the feminism of the time, made me see cooking in a not-too-pleasant light. It was a drudge job, and anybody who actually liked it was an airhead, in my opinion.
Because of my upbringing, most of my cooking experiments as a newlywed were a disaster. To this day, I still see the kitchen as a scary place. Many of my cooking experiments still don’t turn out, and I rely on packaged foods a lot. Being an impatient person doesn’t help. That is probably why the Lord didn’t give me girls!
I have a house full of cookbooks, though, because I still have FAITH that one day I will wake up and be Betty Crocker (I have LONG AGO ditched the idea that cooking is menial. I now ADMIRE good cooks!)
Kelly,
First off, I want to know if you an email me a copy of that dumpling recipe. I want to (and I am sure my husband would too) taste how yummy they are too (smiles). (my email: mrsladysofia@rocketmail.com)
I loved the picture you shared of your children helping in the kitchen. It was such a precious picture. It reminded me of part of a scripture that I read for my devotional reading:
“Truly I say to you, unless you repent (change, turn about) and become like little children [trusting, lowly, loving, forgiving], you can never enter the kingdom of heaven [at all].”
“Whoever will humble himself therefore and become like this little child [trusting, lowly, loving, forgiving] is greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”
“And whoever receives and accepts and welcomes one little child like this for My sake and in My name receives and accepts and welcomes Me.”
“But whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in and acknowledge and cleave to Me to stumble and sin [that is, who entices him or hinders him in right conduct or thought], it would be better (more expedient and profitable or advantageous) for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be sunk in the depth of the sea.”
* Matthew 18: 3-6; amplified bible version *
These verses really tell us how Christ feels about little children. Rather we have children or not, we always need to remember that they are important, even if sometimes they can be challenging or frustrating, for those who accept children are accepted by Christ. Isn’t that what we want? To be accepted by Christ? What a blessing that truly is!
Kelly,
I LOVE that picture! If it were of my girls, I think I would enlarge it, and use caligraphy for the little saying you wrote underneath…and hang it in the kitchen!
Lady Sofia..those verses, with the insets provided, were so beautiful. I can think of so many places as a mother where I could tangibly apply those. I amy write it out and frame a few, for further meditations….
I was not brought up in the kitchen either as a chuild, but mostly because of the times, I suppose? Moms I knew generally cooked alone while the kids played or watched TV. I am sadly a self-taught cook and often have cooking ‘questions’ I am embarrased to ask (but I do anyway, ha!)
My kids like to help cook…esp dinner….but mostly due to my stress level at times in life, it was a time when I could barely concentrate to even get dinner on the table. I also have a ‘galley’, or ‘utility’ kitchen…..there is hardly room to move. I am better at allowing one to help at a time; sometimes too. When we did a cooking project…..I would carry everything out to the dining room and add that room to the clean up mess, too.
My oldest does know how to help cook a bit, but probalby would not fare too well on her own yet. I once read a book that inspired me, and her daughter could cook a weeks worth of meals at 13. That was my goal, but I suppose I missed the mark.
I do like cooking ok, but I suppose my giftedness lies more with crafts. My children seem to be ok with making things, etc. I do know as girls that cooking is becoming a lost art…I really enjoy cooking for my family….esp getting up early to make them something special for a big breakfast…I really need to, as time allots, to make strides in this are. It is difficult because I was quite the tomboy and my mom never taught me to sew, clean, cook….
I imagine many women do not cook simply because no one taught them. And also many women work…and maybe come home and have to much else to do besides cook. It has just kind of evolved into that….
Good point! Thanks for the refreshing inspiration. So often, I’m in a hurry, and it’s hard to face the flying flour of overzealous mixing, or the slow-down of having an eighteen month old “help” (but who can resist a sweet little girl pushing her stool over to the counter, saying hopefully, “too?”). It’s great to remember that just passing on a love for cooking and a comfort in the kitchen is a huge education.
I was reminded of this post as I made snickerdoodles with my little guys yesterday. What a joy to watch my 2 1/2 year old giggle as he dumped in each ingredient! And the older two just loved rolling the balls of dough in the cinnamon sugar. The oldest one didn’t want to help at first, but I reminded him of the story of the little red hen and what happened to the animals that didn’t help out – no bread for them! He quickly changed his mind. :~)
Hey, and dont forget the boys here. Cooking is art and science too….and one of my good friends became the head chef of a state prison, and now is the Head chef of the Meals On Wheels program for our county…..it also gives him MANY opportunties to cater for extra cash for his family-AND many opportun ities to minister, as there is sometimes an ‘overflow’ of food from meals On Wheels that would just get thrown out-he gives it to those he knows in need. He also uses his cooking talents to minister to others. He claims his mother working as a cook on saturdays for weddings at a mansion in town is what he grew up under-he aided her every wedding, out of desire.
Just wanted to put in a plug for the little men we have too, as cooks can do so much with their talent to make a living for their families! 🙂