To me, one of the most important jobs about being a mother and wife is the power we hold in forming bonds between the members of our family.
Not only does our attitude toward our job matter immensely (How do we view our role?), but to the extent that we are deliberate about making a home, we have tremendous influence over this generation growing up under us.
Last night the smells rolling out of the oven were particularly tantalizing. Â It wasn’t a grand meal–just three dishes, but the aromas hovered invitingly over the kitchen.
I thought about how strongly our sense of smell is tied to experience–you know how it works. Years later, a familiar smell can bring memories surprisingly real back to you.
And I wondered if I realize how privileged I am–we all are–to use these senses to build stronger family ties? Are they just little things, or do the senses of home play a bigger role than we think? When combined with repetition, the senses can really have a powerful effect on the feeling of security and familiarity, a very important part of a child’s life.
Can I appeal to their sights by looking to make our home more inviting, more beautiful? Do they see Mom and Dad hugging, smiling, playing together?
Does the taste of meals remind them of someone who took the time to cook their favorites? An occasional splurge of hot chocolate or apple cider? (Growing up, we always had “Chocolate and Biscuit” for breakfast on Christmas morning. This continues to be a favorite tradition, and now we all gather around my parents’ table–3 generations, enjoying a simple and powerful memory-tying experience.)
Does home remind them of yummy smells from the oven each day? Will they remember how Mom smelled as they sat on my lap to read?
Is touching an integral part of their lives? A soft brush on the cheek as I whisper to them how much they are loved? A pat on the back when I walk by, a squeezed hand that communicates my appreciation?
What do they hear? Music? Singing? Laughter? Scripture? Affirming tones? Their name?
“The body is the soul’s prison unless the five senses are fully developed and open. The senses are the windows of the soul.” William Blake
Tying the heart strings…it just makes sense.
12 comments
is this bisuits with chocolate sauce? that was a tradition in Casey’s Dad’s side of the family, too:). of course no one can find the recipe to Nanny’s chocolate sauce! I don’t even think she wrote it down! what recipe do you use? such a blessing to visit with your sweet family yesterday! ((hugs))jen
I needed to be reminded of this during this busy holiday season. Thank you! I am so glad I married a man who insists on delicious meals regularly (he is also a great cook who often cooks those meals). As the mother of 8 I can easily overfocus on cleanliness and order in the home…but it is the smells and scents of home that my children seem to most appreciate (along with the emotional atmosphere of the home). Happy memories of food must have made a difference to our children; our oldest grew up to become a chef :)!
Thank you for the reminder! Too often I get caught up in cleaning and other home jobs, that I neglect the most important! God help me create memories, smells, and sights that tie my children’s hearts to home!
Thank you for the reminder! Too often I get caught up in cleaning and other home jobs, that I neglect the most important! God help me create memories, smells, and sights that tie my children’s hearts to home!
Jen,
I bet our recipe is similar; I would describe it as a “gravy” like texture. Here’s how we make it (prepare yourself for the unhealthiest breakfast ever 😉 which is why we only have it once a year!):
Stir together about 4 heaping Tbls. self-rising flour with 1 heaping Tbls. cocoa and 1 cup sugar.
Stir in approximately half gallon of milk (we really don’t measure this recipe) and heat over stove stirring consistently (or my mom uses microwave) until desired thickness.
We also add a tsp. of vanilla flavoring.
Serve with CANNED biscuits–yes, they’re the best with this recipe 😉
We actually eat it in a bowl like soup, with butter stirred in, tearing the biscuits into bite-sized pieces.
(Enjoyed visiting with you too!)
What an encouraging post… I often think of the sounds of our home being important. I try to have peaceful praise or classical type music playing as a general rule, encourage the kids to speak in a moderate voice with gentle tones (and try to remember to do so myself as well!) I love how you have brought attention to the sights and smells- all parts of a happy, Godly home, right?
Have a beautiful day♥
I agree completely – so many different thing can remind me of childhood, my childhood home and the village I grew up in and my Mum and Dad.
My Mum’s clothes have a very distinctive smell to them – I have a scarf that belongs to her, and when I wear it, I immediatly think of her. My Dad would always listen to Haydn in the lounge, and whenever I hear his music I think of Dad. The feelings are bittersweet now, as I’m married and don’t live near them, and they’re getting old and I worry about losing them. But I’d rather have those lovely feelings of attachment to the smells and sounds, even with the bittersweetness that is now part of the feelings.
What a very nice reminder. Thank you.
So thought provoking! thanks!
So true; I wonder what my kids will remember….
You know, I appreciate your perspective.
It brought to mind how God has given us physical pictures as a frame of reference to what He is doing that we cannot actually see. He has been described as a Shepherd who is willing to do the dirty, smelly job of caring for His sheep, leading us to green pastures and quiet waters while protecting us from prowling lions and wolves.
He’s also a family-loving Father who provides for and disciplines His children. We are spiritually nourished with bread from Heaven and may drink deeply from springs of fresh, clear living water.
In times of spiritual trouble, we can recognize the dead, dryness of a desert wilderness and it causes us to long for that sweet communion and refreshment that we remember…
We could also perhaps take your post one step farther and say: God uses our senses to lead us Home.
🙂
Love it! Chocolate sauce sounds great! We should talk soon…