Home motherhood/family/parenting Conversation About TV: Let’s Face It

Conversation About TV: Let’s Face It

by Kelly Crawford

I’m always suspicious of “gradual change”…like the frog in slowly heating water. I guess I’m old-fashioned that way?

So in one way it seems silly what I’m about to say. And yet by the evidence around me, maybe not so much.

Don’t lose the habit of talking to each other–your husband, your children, your friends–face to face. A hundred years ago, this would have sounded absurd–gradual change coming up…

On the coat-tail of my frustration over the restaurant incident, I must add that I’m amazed all over again, every time we eat somewhere (and it’s almost anywhere we go) at the big-screen TV’s in every corner.

WHAT is this about? Do people not get enough of it at home? Do people not want a change of scenery? Is it any wonder why families barely resemble people who know and love each other?

Now, instead of eating for free in one’s living room while staring at the television, we go pay $40 to do it somewhere else???

At some places, the one who’s back is to the TV is just pitiful. She’s trying to talk to her husband, and trying to look interested, he gives her a few nods while mesmerized at the screen behind her–he can’t help it, God made him to be focused 😉

But some places have really got it together…a TV on both ends, so that I can look over your head, and you over mine, and we’re so happy together….

Absurd, I tell you. And so we concluded that people have gradually been weened away from conversation–they truly struggle to look into each other’s faces and talk.

Which could possibly be, to me, one of the saddest realizations on the planet.

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12 comments

Michelle May 28, 2008 - 11:15 pm

I agree. Hubby and I haven’t had any sort of cable TV (that’s our only option where we live) for almost 5 years now. When we visit my in laws they have their TV on alot and I am absolutely shocked at what is allowed on TV – victoria’s secret commercials are so raunchy and even supposed “Christian” programming is so shallow, lame and unbiblical. Ugh, anyway, I’m grateful we don’t have TV.

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yoshi3329 May 29, 2008 - 9:22 am

I don’t really care for television any longer (frankly, I could do without it).

Also, about restaurants who have televisions; I never really thought of it that way. This post really got me thinking.

http://adlynmorrison.blogspot.com/

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Kimberly May 29, 2008 - 10:27 am

For the past month this very subject has been heavy on my heart. The only difference is I am wanting to banish television in our home. I have three kids, ages 5, 4, and 1. We get 6 channels(one being PBS), but it seems like the TV is taking up a lot of family time. I also cannot stand all the junk on it. There is one program on PBS that tells the children we are all animals and originally started from the water!! My 5 year old was appaled and could not understand why they were lying. “God made us! Do people really believe that phony bologna?”(her words). Also, so many shows are teaching tolerance in small subtle ways that are going in my young children’s minds without them even being aware. Today I am going to declare no television for 1 month and see if it can become a thing of our past. I am going to have my dear sweet husband take the television out to the garage,in case I cave in, because I know I won’t be able to carry it back in! Thank you for your always inspiring, thought provoking posts!!

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Word Warrior May 29, 2008 - 11:25 am

Kimberly,

Your observance are accurate and smart…I’m curious about what’s holding you back?

Be sure to check my next post–very closely related to this subject.

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Kristi May 29, 2008 - 11:35 am

I agree, it is SO annoying when my dh and I finally get to go out on a date and he sits there mesmerized by the TV. Argh!!! I should take the spin on it that you have, it’s the restaurant’s fault, not his, lol! Sometimes I really wish we lived in a different country, from what I’ve heard of certain countries things seem so much more family oriented and simple. I’m so tired of the constant rush and push and busyness here in America.

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Kim M. May 29, 2008 - 11:56 am

We have only had a TV hooked up in our home once in our married life (13 years! yay!). And that was close to the beginning of our marriage –before kids.

People, you WILL NOT regret getting rid of it! Your marriage will be bettered, your children will behave better (they will play better).
We do have a DVD player and the only reason we have kept it is for occasional CLEAN movies (like Little House on the Prairie by the season and the Vision forum DVDs and educational library stuff). We DO NOT go to the video rental store. We used to go, but then we ended up renting stuff that would cause shame and guilt and was not edifying at all (and paying for it!).
The Lord changed our hearts wonderfully in this area!

Believe me, your home will transform. Lately my husband and I have started reading books together out loud. It makes you have some awesome conversation too.
My husband would be a sports’ fanatic if we had a TV. I knew this when we got married and because his family didn’t have one when he was little, it really helped him make the decision. If your hubby gives you a hard time, then PRAY that the Lord will change his heart. Do not nag him… let the Lord do it!

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Anonymous May 29, 2008 - 12:09 pm

Oh, Kimberly! I don’t think you’ll ever go back to sharing your family so much ever again! 🙂

Our computer doubles as our television screen when we watch the occasional movie. When we go over to the in-laws, the TV is always on. In the last few months dh has made quite an effort to avoid it and it has been WONDERFUL. Otherwise I completely lose him to whatever sport is on.

It will be rough at first but you can do it!!!!!

Ashley
http://www.homesteadblogger.com/Jonash2004

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Anonymous May 29, 2008 - 12:34 pm

I must say that getting rid of our TV was the absolute best decision that we have made for our family.

Personally I felt like there was no way to monitor what was coming before my little ones eyes– even on those “safe” programs. The commercials that come across the airways are far too dangerous in my opinion. We do have a DVD player so that we can watch old shows like Little House on the Prairie and things like that, but even that has to be monitored or it can quickly become a waste of time.

Society has become desensitized to sin. Just one more of those “slippery slopes”.

Love this post, Kelly!

Shelly– Mama to five little girls

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Kimberly May 29, 2008 - 1:19 pm

Thanks for your words of encouragement. As soon as I got off the computer my husband took the TV out to the garage. I know at first some days will be hard, but I believe it’s one of the best choices that we will have made for our family.

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Kim M. May 29, 2008 - 1:34 pm

Kimberly, You have a good husband!

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Crystal May 29, 2008 - 2:30 pm

I, too have been wanting to do away with our tv, but my husband likes watching tv. So there is nothing I can do. At least we don’t have to watch it while he is at work.

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Mrs. Taft May 29, 2008 - 7:10 pm

We don’t have cable, nor do we have an antenna to get even local channels, but we do watch some shows together and definitely movies. We actually find it to be a nice experience together, and a springboard for family or couples discourse. But my husband won’t allow tv because of the commercials, and it’s something that definitely needs to be balanced with other forms of togetherness. 🙂

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