Author

Kelly Crawford

Hello! I’m Kelly and I’m glad you’re here. I’m a wife and mom, just like you. I get it. I know how hard the days can be, and how you might feel like you’re spinning your wheels or that no one sees or appreciates your work.

political

Freedom Doesn’t Change the Founding

by Kelly Crawford April 13, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

“We do not consider ourselves a Christian nation, a Jewish nation or a Muslim nation. uh uh We consider ourselves uh uh a nation of us citizens.” Barack Obama

Just wanted to contrast what Obama believes (and sadly, what Christians have even come to believe) with what our founders believed…

“Providence has given to our people the choice of their rulers, and it is the duty … of our Christian nation to select and prefer Christians for their rulers.” (1816) John Jay, First Chief Justice of the Supreme Court

“Those who will not be governed by God will be ruled by tyrants.” William Penn

“This is a religious people. This is historically true. From the discovery of this continent to the present hour, there is a single voice making this affirmation … We find everywhere a clear recognition of the same truth … These, and many other matters which might be noticed, add a volume of unofficial declarations to the mass of organic utterances that this is a Christian nation.” (1892) Justice David Brewer

You gotta grasp this…written by Earl Warren, who was a liberal, Supreme Court Chief Justice:

“I believe no one can read the history of our country without realizing that the Good Book and the spirit of the Savior have from the beginning been our guiding geniuses … Whether we look to the first Charter of Virginia … or to the Charter of New England … or to the Charter of Massachusetts Bay … or to the Fundamental Orders of Connecticut … the same objective is present … a Christian landgoverned by Christian principles.

I believe the entire Bill of Rights came into being because of the knowledge our forefathers had of the Bible and their belief in it: freedom of belief, of expression, of assembly, of petition, the dignity of the individual, the sanctity of the home, equal justice under law, and the reservation of powers to the people … I like to believe we are living today in the spirit of the Christian religion. I like also to believe that as long as we do so, no great harm can come to our country.”

If they weren’t afraid to say it, why are we? No matter what our nation is becoming, shouldn’t we cling to the greatness of the Christian principles which gave her such a noble beginning?

April 13, 2009 18 comments

motherhood/family/parenting

Sibling Relationships–How to Make Them Friends

by Kelly Crawford April 10, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

Lately in our home, we’ve been focusing a lot on sibling relationships. In fact, the rule right now is, “Friends inside the home or no friends outside the home”. We have elevated this part of our training to priority, doing whatever is necessary to make our children friends. Sound harsh? There is one reason behind our determination:

Sibling and family relationships are foundational to all other relationships in life. If those of us from the same home, same rules, same genes, same habits cannot learn selflessness and yielding, how can we expect to get along with a spouse from a different set of circumstances altogether?

So, where do we start? Let me use a Scripture we refer to often…if you don’t grasp the importance of sibling relationships and are content to ignore it under the guise of “kids will be kids”, the strife will never be solved and you do your children a grave injustice. You simply MUST understand the gravity:

“For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield…” James 3:16,17

“Willing to yield”…oh if we could just get that one thing, how much more pleasant life would be! Just like most other principles of Scripture, this one is anti-culture; we are going against the grain and must fight hard to instill this concept into our children. (How many times have you heard parents say they want their kids in school so they can learn to “fight for themselves”? It’s a great humanist goal, but absolutely non-biblical.)

How do we foster this ever-important sibling friendship in our homes?

Make it important. Just as I mentioned above, our children know that “until they are friends in our home, they aren’t ready to have friends elsewhere”. If it means limiting regular interaction with friends, so be it. We’re serious and they know it.

Use the language from Scripture and keep pointing back to the basis for all behavior. They should know that our insistence on kind behavior comes from a higher authority than ours. “Yield”, “selfless”, “esteeming others better than yourselves”–let them get used to hearing those terms.

Understand their childishness without allowing it to continue. We know they are immature and are growing, and patience should be distributed accordingly. But we should be always moving them in the direction of maturity. It should be a continual growing process with more and more expectations.

Heart issues are priority, but habits are usually turned inward. I’ve said before, “I can’t make you share”…but we have discovered more and more that children often just need to get into the habit of generosity and kindness, and those habits will eventually internalize.

Try to catch every inappropriate act. This is where our job gets tedious and challenging…but the rewards are worth it! And yes, we have to “be there” physically, close by, ready and willing to intervene. Examine the situation and steer responses and tones in the right direction. Make them repeat an unkind word in a kinder tone, and make them keep short accounts with each other.

Talk in “friend” language. This has a little to do with brain-washing 😉 Tell your children that they are best friends. If I catch a child doing the slightest kind thing for/to another, I try to notice and say, “You are so blessed to have ____ as a sister! Y’all are best friends, I can tell!”

And one day, the harvest will come, when your adult children adore each other and enjoy spending time with each other’s families, and all other relationships have been strengthened from the lessons learned at home.

Then you can start on the grandchildren 😉

April 10, 2009 18 comments

Feature Friday: Answering Your Questions:Teaching Children to Sit Still in Church

by Kelly Crawford April 9, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

OK, so I’m already second-guessing my announcement from yesterday to do “How to Make Money Blogging” on Fridays…mainly because I know though a fragment of you would be interested in that topic, the majority probably would not, and since it doesn’t really fit the scope of my blog, I’m thinking it may not be the wisest choice of topics.

With that said, I think I will try featuring YOUR questions on Friday. That is, if you have topics you’d like to see addressed, email me and I’ll consider featuring that topic on Fridays. (Get my address from the “contact” button in my sidebar.) It helps me to hear from you about things that are important, and I’m sure others will benefit too.

And recently a reader emailed and asked if I would address the topic of teaching children to sit still in church.

I love this one! About 5 years ago we began attending a family-integrated church (the whole family stays together though the entire service). Not only did we personally experience the benefits/joys/struggles of teaching our children to sit still with us, but we have witnessed numerous families who have been successful with less effort than you may think.

I don’t know that there is a magic bullet, but this has been my observation:

Expect it. Don’t buy the notion that “children can’t sit still for that long” because they can; and whereas sitting for extended periods of time seems unfair to me (classroom?) a few hours is a great exercise in discipline.
Practice at home. Scheduling a family worship time is an excellent time for training. We require our littlest ones to be still for that time and they learn pretty quickly what is expected of them. (If your husband doesn’t lead a family worship time, you can implement the same training reading a book out loud during the day.)
Younger ones learn from the older ones. Much of the training of little ones becomes easier once you have a few older ones who know the rules.
Training at church. I have found that the hardest time is between the age of about 1 and 2. This is the window they don’t seem to “get it”. One thing I have found very helpful is taking them to the back (out into a separate foyer is ideal) and sitting with them there, talking to them and correcting them as needed. With more freedom to talk and correct, they can learn that taking them out doesn’t mean they get to go to the nursery and play. It is time-consuming (we’re child-training remember?) but it doesn’t take many weeks of consistent training to get them there. (I confess though, in the early stages, I often fall to the temptation of going to the “cry room” and letting them play on the floor; but this just prolongs the inevitable training process.)

For most of our younger children, we allow them to draw during the sermon. I guess this is just a personal decision.

And for those wondering, our kids look forward to and even ask “when are we going to church again?” Worshiping as a family has been a tremendous blessing and I would encourage you to try it!

April 9, 2009 20 comments

frugal living/saving money

Yeah, It’ll Pass for Thrifty Thursday ;-)

by Kelly Crawford April 9, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

Had to post…I encourage you to also.

April 9, 2009 9 comments

frugal living/saving money

Thrifty Thursday: More Power-Saving Ideas

by Kelly Crawford April 8, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

(I am going to attempt to start a trend here, though for the schedully-challenged like me, don’t hold your breath 😉 I would never be able to stick to a *theme* for each day of the week, but I would like to try to start one for Thursdays and Fridays: “Thrifty Thursday” (speaks for itself) and “Feature Friday: How to Make Money Blogging”. If you ever have suggestions/requests for topics, I’d love to hear them! Or if you get tired of hearing about a certain topic, let me know that too!)

Without further ado…the first “Thrifty Thursday” post…

You may remember this post from my friend, Jane, who has gotten really creative in her efforts to save money on the power bill. I just had to show you what she’s up to now…she’s my hero.

Welcome to My Kitchen

April 8, 2009 6 comments

health motherhood/family/parenting pregnancy/birth control

Pregnancy is For Our Health

by Kelly Crawford April 7, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

(Just a head’s up…this is a “chic post”.)

I can’t help it…I love to post statistics about the health benefits of pregnancy (especially as my large self needs the extra encouragement 😉

But mostly because I think we are a culture that treats pregnancy like a sickness. I mean, why wouldn’t we with the constant expectation of “prevention”? (No one ever tries to prevent anything good, healthy and profitable…they only try to prevent “bad”.)

Anyway, a few fun facts…with a quote I thought worthy of posting. I love that the wisdom of our Creator flies in the face of human wisdom, especially when science proves it. I may point out the fact mentioned below, yet again, that the decrease in certain cancers is relative to the number of pregnancies a woman has. In other words, the more babies, the less her chance of these cancers.

Does that mesh with what the general buzz is about multiple pregnancies? (I’ve been questioned more than once about “a uterus falling out”??? Sorry, hope that’s not too graphic, but c’mon, people, really…)

“Say Bye-Bye to Menstrual Cramps–Sooner or later after childbirth, your menstrual cycle will resume. But here’s a welcome side effect: You may have fewer bothersome cramps. Some women even find that menstrual pain ceases altogether after pregnancy and childbirth. This pain reduction is a well-known phenomenon, but no one really knows for sure why it occurs. One possible theory is that childbirth eliminates some of the prostaglandin receptor sites in the uterus. Prostaglandins are hormones with several functions, one of which is to direct the uterus to contract during labor. They also play a role in menstrual pain. The upshot? Fewer pain-receptor sites, fewer cramps.”

Let me testify here…I had never heard of this “phenomenon”, but experienced it and was completely, gleefully amazed. I think it was after my third, maybe fourth child, when suddenly, what used to be pretty bad cramps on the first day of my cycle completely disappeared–and have never returned…well, what few times I’ve had the chance to see 😉

“Cancer Risk Is Reduced–Recent studies report that pregnancy produces a protective effect against breast and ovarian cancers. The more pregnancies you go through — and the younger you start having babies — the greater the effect; some research has found that breastfeeding for more than three months can also lower the risk of certain cancers.”

“Childbirth has been compared with marathon running, for good reason. Some studies suggest that women gain a newfound sense of their own strength after going through labor and delivery. At minimum, pregnancy and childbirth can change your perspective for the better. When you’re living with the knowledge that your body is creating a new person and delivering him or her into the world, you’re less likely — at least some of the time — to sweat the small stuff.”

“Pregnancy, on balance, is good for women. The benefits of childbirth far outweigh the risks involved…The likelihood that a woman will contract breast cancer, for example, is significantly reduced when she carries a pregnancy to full term. How fitting that the life a mother gives birth to gives life back to her.” Peter McFadden

April 7, 2009 47 comments

motherhood/family/parenting

Tedious Motherhood Now, or Medication Later?

by Kelly Crawford April 7, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

The longer I’m a mother, the more I can see the tedious work involved in raising healthy, competent, stable children.

Is anyone appalled at statistics floating around out there about the number of adults and children alike on anti-depressants? Is anyone appalled by the increasing number of stories in the news of outrageous behavior? Teen addictions? Teen depression and suicide? Children murdering each other?

Sin exists. Evil exists. But I don’t think we’ve ever known a day where it is so rampant…especially among children. Something is so amiss, so completely wrong that we should be willing to accept whatever conclusions we find to fix it.

Here is one report from a site called “Fight for Kids“:

“Today, children 5 years old and younger are the fastest-growing segment of the non-adult population prescribed antidepressants in the U.S. Children as young as 4 have attempted suicide while influenced by such drugs and 5 year olds have committed suicide. Between 1995 and 1999, antidepressant use increased 580% in the under 6 population and 151% in the 7-12 age group.”

I don’t mean to try to oversimplify things…admittedly, there is a plethora of problems our society faces, stemming from a vast number of underlying causes. And this post offers some broad generalizations; still, a noteworthy look is in order.

On a simple level, as a mother, I can see in my own children’s lives how crucial the day-in, day-out shaping of the person is. Training them to deal with life. It is tedious! Time-consuming. Hard. And who is willing but a parent? Could this be one of the biggest “missing links” among families?

My 1 1/2 year old has a new “reaction”. It’s as normal and natural for her as breathing. Whenever a sibling touches her or does something in the least that she doesn’t like, she furrows her brow and says (not kindly) “No!”

She’s expressing herself…yeah I know. But as a baby, she doesn’t have any self-control or “tools” with which to handle her “expressions”.

It’s our job to give that to her. I don’t know how many times a day I have to stop her, tell her “you may not scream“, or “No ma’am, you don’t speak like that”, and then replace it with a better response. And often, it’s inconvenient, or tiring–easy to ignore. But ignoring isn’t part of my job.

She hasn’t gotten it yet, but she will. And that’s a tiny little example of what will blossom into an ongoing method of teaching her self-control, kindness and yielding of her will to others.

It’s those very things that we’re missing as a whole in our day. And I think the reason is rather simple:

We’re so focused on the wrong things, we don’t even have the understanding of how important this character-building is. As parents, we’ve been told “athletics is important”. “Academics is important”. “Success/making money is important.”

Little is spoken of the importance of “wisdom, self-control, responsibility and integrity”.

And the pursuit of those things sucks up all our time and energy until we are hardly providing beyond the basics–food, shelter and clothing–for our children. And if we’re not in pursuit of those “important” things, we spend our time in amusement, trying to drown out the cares of life. (I still love the quote…”A soldier has no time for amusement“). Don’t get me wrong, we love our movie night…I’m addressing an amusement-addicted culture.

We have raised a generation of unyielding, out-of-control, angry or depressed adults, who can barely function without medication. (I know there are rare cases where sickness is truly present and needs medicated, but it can’t be that we’ve suddenly had such a sharp increase in “mental sickness” in the last decade–there has to be another answer.)

We’re dropping the ball, and we’re paying for it.

It’s why my heart breaks when motherhood is so undervalued; it’s not about “my need for recognition as a mother”…it’s about what is happening to a whole generation of children , left without the supernatural concern and intutition of parents in their most formative years, unequipped to deal with life on the simplest level, and then turning into adults who still bear the intense suffering of that unbringing.

Mothers, take the time. Weed those little gardens…tedious as it is, as many times as those weeds sprout up again…keep at it. It’s bigger than today.

Devotions, Advice & Renewal for When Motherhood Feels Too Hard

“The eBook? AMAZING!!!!! It’s what you need, I guarantee it!” -Jennifer, Renewing Housewives

$4.97

or get the Kindle version

April 7, 2009 20 comments

motherhood/family/parenting

Dr. Laura: In Praise of Stay-at-Home Moms

by Kelly Crawford April 7, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

She just cracks me up…wondering if anyone has heard of/read this book? I respect a whole lot of what Dr. Laura has to say…hoping this book is a real encouragement. I may have to get it!

April 7, 2009 11 comments

christian living motherhood/family/parenting

Gratitude in Grief–Weeping With Those Who Weep

by Kelly Crawford April 5, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

During the time we walked with our friend’s through the death of their baby, Kathy collected the pictures (thank you Trish) and made this video to give them…something to hold, something to remember.

It was truly beautiful to see the body of Christ gather around them, encircling them in love and prayers and tears.

This is a tribute to Baby Willie.

April 5, 2009 5 comments

christian living

Judge Not? Don’t Be Confused ~ A.W. Tozer Quote

by Kelly Crawford April 5, 2009

written by Kelly Crawford

“Many tender-minded Christians fear to sin against love by daring to inquire into anything that comes wearing the cloak of Christianity and breathing the name of Jesus. They dare not examine the credentials of the latest prophet to hit their town lest they be guilty of rejecting something which may be of God.

They timidly remember how the Pharisees refused to accept Christ when He came, and they do not want to be caught in the same snare, so they either reserve judgment or shut their eyes and accept everything without question. This is supposed to indicate a high degree of spirituality. But in sober fact it indicates no such thing. It may indeed be evidence of the absence of the Holy Spirit.

Gullibility is not synonymous with spirituality. Faith is not a mental habit leading its possessor to open his mouth and swallow everything that has about it the color of the supernatural. Faith keeps its heart open to whatever is of God, and rejects everything that is not of God, however wonderful it may be. Try the spirits is a command of the Holy Spirit to the Church.

We may sin as certainly by approving the spurious as by rejecting the genuine. And the current habit of refusing to take sides is not the way to avoid the question. To appraise things with a heart of love and then to act on the results is an obligation resting upon every Christian in the world. And the more as we see the day approaching.”
A.W. Tozer

“Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world. By this we know the Spirit of God: every spirit that confesses that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is from God; and every spirit that does not confess Jesus is not from God; this is the spirit of the antichrist, of which you have heard that it is coming, and now is already in the world. You are from God, little children, and have overcome them; because greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world. They are from the world; therefore they speak as from the world, and the world listens to them. We are from God; he who knows God listens to us; he who is not from God does not listen to us. By this we know the spirit of truth and the spirit of error.” 1 John 4:1-6

April 5, 2009 6 comments

Newer Posts

Older Posts

Kelly Crawford

Post Category

Author's Picks

Latest posts