5 Things Every Woman Needs to Hear (So I’m Telling You)

There are 5 things every woman needs to hear. In case you don’t have a woman in your life to tell you, let me:

• You’re not alone. You really, truly aren’t. Whatever you struggle with–discouragement, marital problems, a child who makes you feel like giving up, feelings of being overwhelmed–all other women struggle with those things too, at some point. The reason you might feel alone is due to another problem: we aren’t transparent enough with each other. You need to find a few women–true friends–with whom you feel free to share your heart, and be strengthened by that unity of experience.

• It will get better. Whatever the thing is, it will most likely get better. The overwhelmed feelings of having lots of little ones, or combating a messy house, or refereeing disputes–it’s a season, albeit a very looooong one, but it will pass, and the only thing for us to do right now is “mom-up” and do the very best we can, cushioning our days with prayer and communion with our Heavenly Father. It helps to accept that just like any other job, some days motherhood is just hard. It requires a whole lot of effort, preparation and work. Don’t let it take you by surprise.

Another thing: don’t enslave yourself by other’s expectations. God doesn’t require the moon.  He only requires a few things: to do justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with Him. To be imitators of Christ, to love our husbands and children, and to be busy at home. We add all the other stuff.

• Failing is normal. It really is. But we have to be careful: the fact that it’s normal, part of our weakness in the flesh, doesn’t give us license to be lazy, give up, or make excuses. It does, however, help us to know that everyone fails, no one is perfect, and even if you find yourself repenting for the same mistakes, frustrated by the same vices, that’s just a part a life. We are resilient. Your children are too. Messing up will not ruin them. Denying your failures will. The important thing is that you continue seeing failures for what they are: inevitable, and places of repentance that help us grow and help those around us learn humility by our willingness to be real about our shortcomings.

• You might need to do a health assessment. Recently as I relayed to a friend my struggle with PMS and other things (I struggle with mild depression too, on and off), she sympathized, but then told me about checking my progesterone levels. Which I had heard, but forgot, and just needed a friend who recently walked the same road to remind me. I also think aging women need to be taking Vitamin D, Magnesium and Calcium Citrate and Iron, at the least. I’m also going be adding Plexus to my nutrition regime as I’ve read all the amazing testimonials about its effects for fatigue and other health problems.

• You are not defined by your role as a wife or mother, or even friend or daughter. You are defined by your identity in Christ. And here it is: you are wholly, perfectly loved and watched after. No matter how bad you think you are at your job, it doesn’t lessen your worth as a child of the King. You are royalty, my friend, clothed in robes of righteousness not woven from your work, but from the imperishable blood of Christ. Live like a daughter of the King.